1-A Groupchat
by RRanger0896
Summary: Deku starts a Group chat for class 1-A. This might have been a mistake.
1. Satan's Porno Collection

3:30 pm on a saturday.

**Izuku Midoriya** has created **1-A chat**

**Izuku Midoriya **has invited 19 others to **1-A Chat**

**Izuku Midoriya **has changed his username to **Deku**

**Deku: **This should be fun.

6:00 pm

**Denki Kaminari**: what have we here?

**Denki Kaminari **has changed his username to **Pikachu**

**Pikachu **has changed **Toru Hagakure**'s username to **Discount Sue Storm**

**Pikachu **has changed **Tsuyu Asui**'s username to **Froggy Style**

**Pikachu **has changed **Katsuki Bakugo**'s username to **Bomberman**

**Pikachu **has changed **Minoru Mineta**'s username to **Serial Grapist**

**Pikachu** has changed **Tenya Lida**'s username to **Sonic**

**Pikachu **has changed **Kyoka Jiro**'s username to **Bass Bitch**

**Pikachu **has changed **Mina Ashido**'s username to **Acid Trip**

**Pikachu **has changed **Mezo Shoji**'s username to** Tentacle Hentai**

**Pikachu **has changed **Hanta Sero**'s username to **Bootleg Spiderman**

**Pikachu **has changed **Shoto Todoroki**'s username to **Thermostat**

**Pikachu **has changed **Eijiro Kirishima**'s username to **Knuckles**

**Pikachu **has changed **Yuga Aoyama**'s username to **French Fry**

**Pikachu **has changed **Mashirao Ojiro**'s username to **Tails**

**Pikachu **has changed** Momo Yaoyorozu**'s username to **Deus Ex Machina**

**Pikachu **has changed **Ochaco Uraraka**'s username to** Anti-Grav**

**Pikachu **has changed** Koji Koda**'s username to **Ultra Furry**

**Pikachu **has changed **Rikido Sato**'s username to **Sugar Daddy**

**Pikachu **has changed **Fumikage Tokoyami**'s username to **Col. Sanders**

**Pikachu **has changed the group's name from **1-A Chat** to **Satan's Porno Stash**

**Pikachu:** my work here is done.


	2. The Fall Of Mineta

**Satan's Porno Colection**

7:00 pm

**Bomberman: **WHAT IN THE FRESH HELL IS THIS?

**Sonic:** Language Bakugo!

**Bomberman:** FUCK OFF LIDA

**Deku:** I'm beginning to think this was a big mistake.

**Bass Bitch:** Even bigger then Kaminari giving Mineta that box of porn.

**Bass Bitch:** It was like giving a monkey a loaded gun.

**Deku:** I don't think it was that bad.

**Deku:** A monkey can cause a lot of damage to others with a loaded gun, while Mineta with a box of porn can only cause damage to himself.

**Tails:** Doesn't he sleep in the room next to you?

**Deku:** Unfortunately, the sounds are bad but the smell is even worse.

**Deku:** It's like living next to a psycho midget german prostitute.

**Acid Trip:** How would you know that.

**Bomberman:** I'm wondering about that to.

**Deku:** I'm 90% sure my neighbor was a psycho midget german prostitute.

**Serial Grapist:** Do you have her number?

**Bomberman:** WHAT THE FUCK! THERE ARE SOME THINGS ONE MAN SHOULD NOT SAY TO ANOTHER MAN.

**Sonic:** While I disagree with the language used, I have to agree with Bakugo's statement. Mineta I will be telling Aizawa about your actions and the box of porn in your room.

**Discount Sue Storm: **DO IT! RAT OUT THAT BASTARD.

**Deku:** Let's change the subject.

**Deku:** Kaminari, why did you change all of the usernames?

**Pikachu:** Cause it was funny.

**Froggy Style:** I don't like mine.

**Froggy Style:** In fact.

**Froggy Style** has changed her username to **Froppy**

**Col. Sanders** has changed his username to **Tsukuyomi**

**Tsukuyomi:** Fuck you Kaminari.

**Deku** has changed the group name to **Fuck you Kaminari**

**Pikachu:** Why have you forsaken me Midoriya?

**Deku:** It amuses me.

**Anti-Grav:** I thought you were regretting this Deku?

**Deku:** I'm just gonna roll with it.

**Ultra Furry:** What's a furry?

**Bomberman:** ….

**Sonic:** ….

**Anti-Grav:** ….

**Bass Bitch:** ….

**Pikachu:** ….

**Deku:** …

**Deus Ex Machina:** ….

**Tails:** ….

**Bootleg Spiderman:** ….

**Tentacle Hentai:** ….

**Sugar Daddy:** ….

**Froppy:** ….

**Tsukuyomi:** ….

**Acid Trip:** ….

**Knuckles:** ….

**French Fry:** ….

**Discount Sue Storm:** ….

**Thermostat:** I don't know what it is either.

**Serial Grapist:** Well kids you see, sometimes a man has a particular interest

**Deku:** DON'T YOU DARE!

**Serial Grapist:** He puts on a suit kind of like a mascot costume

**Bomberman:** IF YOU CONTINUE THIS THEY WILL NOT FIND A BODY!

**Serial Grapist:** he then meets up with several like minded individuals

**Sonic:** Bakugo, Midoriya I will look the other way just this once. Do what you have to do.

**Serial Grapist:** They then bang each other.

**Deus Ex Machina:** Anyone hear a loud banging sound?

**Knuckles:** BakuBro and MidoriBro found Mineta and are taking turns beating him to a pulp.

**Knuckles:** They are tagging in and out like a Mexican wrestling team.

**Knuckles:** So Manly.

**Deku:** That was fun. Sorry Mineta ruined your innocence Koda.

**Bomberman:** Twat waffle deserved the beating we gave him.

**Deku:** Twat waffle. That's a new one.

**Deku** has changed **Serial Grapist**'s username to **Twat Waffle**

**Acid Trip:** Bakugo and Midori, World's best tag team crew. If the hero thing doesn't work out you can always make a living fighting for pesos in Tijuana.

**Deku:** Thanks?

**Bomberman:** ...?


	3. We Are Sex Bob-Omb

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Twat Waffle** \- Minoru Mineta

**Pikachu** \- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- French Fry

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

12:00 pm on a sunday

**Fuck You Kaminari**

**Bass Bitch:** Anyone hear that?

**Deus Ex Machina:** Hear what?

**Bass Bitch:** It sounds like drumming and playing guitar.

**Anti-Grav:** It could just be someone listening to music.

**Bass Bitch:** It doesn't sound like its coming from an mp3 player, it sounds like live music. I'm going to get to the bottom of this.

**Acid Trip:** What is up with her and music?

**Deus Ex Machina:** One could ask the same about you and your breakdancing hobby.

**Discount Sue Storm:** Everyone has their interests and hobbies Ashido.

**Bass Bitch:** I found it.

**Bass Bitch:** This is too good.

**Bass Bitch:** _Bomber& _

**Acid Trip:** When did Midori learn to play guitar?

**Anti-Grav:** When did they start a band?

**Discount Sue Storm:** What were they playing?

**Bass Bitch:** They were playing My Hero by Foo Fighters but without the bassline. Midoriya asked if I would like to fill in the bass line so that could be fun.

**Froppy:** What did you name your band?

**Deku:** Here's the thing.

**Bomberman:** this useless idiot hasn't come up with a good name yet.

**Deku:** It's important to get a name right. There was this one band from the UK called "The Show Has Been Canceled" but no one went to see them. Bit pointless really. They did reform like a month later under the new name "We Have Split Up" but still no one went to see them.

**Bomberman:** Some band you heard of?

**Deku:** Fine it was our band and it wasn't in the UK.

**Bomberman:** Dumbass

**Deku:** Didn't see you suggesting any good names.

**Bass Bitch:** Before you two manage to kill each other through a chatroom how does Sex Bob-Omb sound for a band name?

**Deku:** Isn't that from Scott Pilgrim vs The World

**Bomberman:** I like it.

**Deku:** Of course you like it. You like anything that implies explosions.

**Bass Bitch:** If The Killers can take their name from a fictional band from a movie, anyone can.

**Deku:** If that's the case

**Deku:** WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB.

**Bomberman:** Realy?

**Bass Bitch** has renamed the groupchat to **WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB**

**Bomberman: **REALY?

9:00 pm

**Pikachu:** Has anyone seen Mineta around? He hasn't shown up since he got beaten by Bakugo and Midoriya.

**Sonic:** Thanks for reminding me I almost forgot.

**Sonic** has invited **Offbrand Batman** to the chat

**Offbrand Batman:** ...Why offbrand Batman?

**Deku:** This is a shot in the dark but I'm gonna say it's cause you wear all black and operate only at night.

**Offbrand Batman:** Anyways, due to recent events and possession of contraband items Minoru Mineta has been expelled from UA. You will have a student from the General Studies class joining you on monday.

**Offbrand Batman** has left the chat

**Pikachu:** New student wonder who it is?

**Deku:** _*Smiles slyly*_

**Knuckles:** You know who it is bro?

**Deku:** Perhaps

**Acid Trip:** You gonna tell us who?

**Deku:** *_Backs away slowly*_

**Discount Sue Storm:** I'm kinda freaked out by Midoriya right now.

**Bomberman:** Not as funny as the time he mispronounced "philanthropist" as "Full On Rapist"

**Bomberman:** Poor bastard was doing an oral report on John D. Rockafeller Jr. and got nervous and said he was a full on rapist instead of a philanthropist. Even the teacher started laughing. That was a good day.

_**Author's note**_

_**I feel like playing a game. Try to guess all the references I have included so far. I will put the answers from the first three chapters at the end of the next chapter. Good luck.**_


	4. Introducing: Purple Haze

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Pikachu** \- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- French Fry

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB**

5:00 pm on a Monday

**Deku: **And that is just the first five steps to a prostate-assisted orgasm.

**Bass Bitch:** ….

**French Fry: **….

**Anti-Grav:** ….

**Bomberman: **….WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?

**Sonic:** Midoriya why do you even know that?

**Deku: **Being in the dorms is boring sometimes and I like googling fucked up shit when I'm bored.

**Pikachu: **Ok I just caught the end of that. I have finally finished cleaning Mineta's room out, btw why was there a blacklight just laying on the floor?

**Deku: **I was wondering where I left that. I needed to know how much bleach to get and I just couldn't fathom what I saw.

**Deku: **It was like a Jackson Pollock painting in that room.

**Deku: **If could have seen that he would become a celibate priest.

**Hitoshi Shinso **has joined the chat

**Hitoshi Shinso: **What in the fresh hell is this?

**Pikachu **has changed **Hitoshi Shinso**'s name to **Purple Haze**

**Purple Haze: **Why?

**Deku: **You hair is purple and you quirk kind of makes your mind feel hazy.

**Pikachu: **It's a weed joke.

**Sonic: **Those type of jokes are highly inappropriate. I demand you to desist this instant.

**Pikachu:** Relax class prez it's just a joke, besides weed is legal now and the age to use it here is 16 and I don't think anyone in our class smokes weed.

**Deku: **Well you see.

**Thermostat: **The thing is.

**Sonic: **Out with it.

**Bomberman: **Both Deku and Icy-hot smoke weed.

**Thermostat: **It helps with my anxiety.

**Deku: **I have pain from the damage in my arms.

**Sonic: **Don't they make medications that help with those problems.

**Deku: **I'm allergic to an ingredient in most pain pills.

**Deku: **Like blisters on the inside of every opening of my body.

**Deku: **EVERY opening.

**Tsukuyomi: **Is that why you would lock yourself in your room for days at a time?

**French Fry: **Is that also why you would scream while using the bathroom during those times?

**Deku: **Yes to both of you, also very observant.

**Bass Bitch: **TMI dude. TMI

**Thermostat: **The anti anxiety medications side effects are worse than what there supposed to be curing.

**Thermostat: **When I took them I couldn't keep any food down and if I skipped a dosage it would cause suicidal tendencies.

**Deku: **It's like natures cure-all.

**Purple Haze: **Could I get a happy sack from one of you? I have trouble sleeping.

**Deku: **I'll give you some Drizella, that usually helps make me sleepy. Just be careful, it's what I like to call a one hit wonder weed. Just one hit is all it takes.

**Anti-Grav: **MY WORLD IS SHATTERING!

**Discount Sue Storm: **Of all the people I thought would smoke weed, you were the very bottom of the list **DekuB.**

**Pikachu: **Maybe you should give Bakugo some weed.

**Bomberman: **WHAT WAS THAT YOU ELECTRIC RAT FUCK?

**Pikachu: **RUNNING NOW

**Pikachu: **He'll never find me here.

**Bomberman: **YOU CAN'T HIDE FOREVER

**Bass Bitch: **Very clever hiding in a washing machine in the laundry room.

**Pikachu: **JIRO, WHY?

**Bass Bitch: **Cause fuck you Kaminari that's why.

**Deku: **This is all on you Kaminari. You just had to play poke the bear. In fact.

**Deku** has renamed the chat to **Fuck you Kaminari: With A Vengence**

**Bomberman: **_Pikachu' _

**Deku: **please tell me you didn't put any bleach in there?

**Bomberman: **God no, I'm not a monster. I just set it to the gentle cycle. Besides I'm sure you can open a front-loader washer from the inside.

**Sonic: **BAKUGO I INSIST YOU LET HIM OUT THIS INSTANT.

**Bomberman: **Fine.

**Pikachu: **Lesson learned. Never play hide and seek with Bakugo,or hide in any laundry appliances.

**Authors Note**

**Answers: Chapter 2 - The whole conversation about the box of porn and the damage it can do is a reference to an episode of That 70's Show. The psycho midget german prostitute is a reference to a joke from a Craig Ferguson standup routine. and finally Bakugo's reaction to Mineta asking for her phone number is a reference to the end of Mallrats after Jason Lee's character gives an extremely inappropriate speech about his cousin masturbating on an airplane and the other guy asking if he finished. (Idea for another project I'm working on.) **

**Answers: Chapter 3 - the whole bit on band names is from the Gorillaz iTunes interview and "Full On Rapist" instead of philanthropist is from It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia.**

**Have fun finding the references in chapter 4.**

**Also you can find this on Archive of our own. Here's the link.**

/works/19665343/chapters/46582717#workskin

**Later.**


	5. The Rock Show

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Pikachu** \- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- French Fry

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Fuck you Kaminari: With A Vengence**

9:00 pm on a Friday

**Bomberman:** Ok extras everyone up on the roof now.

**Anti-Grav:** What's this all about?

**Sonic: **I am also wondering what's going on.

**Deku: ** Just go up there, trust me you'll love it.

When the students of 1-A got to the roof, to say they were surprised was a huge understatement. On the roof was Izuku Midoriya with a black Les Paul guitar, Kyoka Jiro with a purple Fender Strat bass, Hitoshi Shinso with a Casio keyboard and a blue Epiphone SG and Katsuki Bakugo sitting behind a Pearl double bass 8-piece drum kit. Izuku stepped up to the microphone and said "Ladies and gentlemen of 1-A, we are Sex Bob-Omb and welcom to our inaguarl show. " and with that the band started to play.

"**I want Neil Young on your phone speaker in the morning**

**And fuck him if he just can't see**

**This is how his songs are supposed to be heard**

**No more lectures on fidelity**

**I don't believe in mysticism**

**Only in what science proves**

**Like the sex appeal of your sick dance moves**

**Ooh, wee, ooh, wee**

**Put on your red beret, baby**

**Moonwalk naked across the room (Ooh)**

**Do something kinda unique to me**

**Do something that'll make me swoon (Ooh)**

**That's how I know that I'm not pretending**

**I know it's not make believe (Ooh)**

**It's only complicated if you want it to be**

**Do you know what I mean? It's byzantine**

**I want Hi-Chews, playlists, smoking on the roof**

**And I love the way you look at me**

**Tennessee Williams in Stuart Weitzman boots**

**Yeah, you're just too wild to believe**

**A fetish for athletic fashion**

**Running shoes and striped track suits**

**I never heard of Sparks before**

**But I'm so glad you shared them with me**

**Put on your red beret, baby**

**Moonwalk naked across the room (Ooh)**

**Do something kinda unique to me**

**Do something that'll make me swoon (Ooh)**

**That's how I know that I'm not pretending**

**I know it's not make believe (Ooh)**

**It's only complicated if you want it to be**

**Do you know what I mean? It's byzantine**

**Rollin', crashin', breakin', splashing**

**Givin', takin', makin', breakin' promises**

**You got me high when I was low**

**Negative ions, come save my soul (Soul, soul)**

**Put on your red beret, baby**

**Moonwalk naked across the room (Ooh)**

**Do something kinda unique to me**

**Do something that'll make me swoon (Ooh)**

**That's how I know that I'm not pretending**

**I know it's not make believe (Ooh)**

**It's only complicated if you want it to be**

**Do you know what I mean? It's byzantine**

**It's byzantine, it's byzantine**

**It's byzantine, it's byzantine"**

**_Song End, Next Song_**

**Some people like to gamble**

**But you, you always lose**

**Some people like to rock 'n' roll**

**You're always singing the blues**

**You got a nasty disposition**

**No one really knows the reason why**

**You got a bad, bad reputation**

**Gonna hang down your head and cry**

**Y'got bad, bad luck**

**Bad, bad luck**

**Y'got bad, bad luck**

**Bad, bad luck**

**Thirteen's my lucky number**

**To you it means stay inside**

**Black cat done crossed my path**

**No reason to run and hide**

**You're looking through a cracked mirror**

**No one really knows the reason why**

**Your enemies are getting nearer**

**Gonna hang down your head and cry**

**Y'got bad, bad luck**

**Bad, bad luck**

**Y'got bad, bad luck**

**Bad, bad luck**

**Some people go to church on Sundays**

**Others, they pray at home**

**You tell them that there ain't no God**

**That they're better off standing alone**

**You're always scratching at the eight ball**

**No one really knows the reason why**

**You get to the top and then you fall**

**Gonna hang your head down and cry**

**Y'got bad, bad luck**

**Bad, bad luck**

**Y'got bad, bad luck**

**Bad, bad luck**

**Y'got bad, bad luck**

**Bad, bad luck, c'mon give it to me**

**Bad, bad luck**

**Bad, bad luck, c'mon give it**

**_Song End, Next Song_**

**How can you see into my eyes like open doors?**

**Leading you down into my core**

**Where I've become so numb, without a soul**

**My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold**

**Until you find it there and lead it back home**

_**Wake me up**_**, Wake me up inside**

_**I can't wake up**_** ,Wake me up inside**

_**Save me**_**, Call my name and save me from the dark**

_**Wake me up**_**, Bid my blood to run**

_**I can't wake up**_**, Before I come undone**

_**Save me**_**, Save me from the nothing I've become**

**Now that I know what I'm without**

**You can't just leave me**

**Breathe into me and make me real**

**Bring me to life**

_**Wake me up**_**, Wake me up inside**

_**I can't wake up**_**, Wake me up inside**

_**Save me**_**, Call my name and save me from the dark**

_**Wake me up**_**, Bid my blood to run**

_**I can't wake up**_**, Before I come undone**

_**Save me**_**, Save me from the nothing I've become**

**Bring me to life**

**I've been livin' a lie, there's nothing inside**

_**Bring me to life**_

**Frozen inside, without your touch**

**Without your love, darling**

**Only you are the life**

**Among the dead**

_**All this time, I can't believe I couldn't see**_

_**Kept in the dark, but you were there in front of me**_

_**I've been sleeping a thousand years, it seems**_

_**Got to open my eyes to everything!**_

**Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul**

**Don't let me die here**

_**There must be something more!**_

_**Bring me to life!**_

_**Wake me up**_**, Wake me up inside**

_**I can't wake up**_**, Wake me up inside**

_**Save me, Call my name and save me from the dark**_

_**Wake me up**_**, Bid my blood to run**

_**I can't wake up,**_** Before I come undone**

_**Save me,**_** Save me from the nothing I've become**

_**Bring me to life**_

_**I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside**_

_**Bring me to life**_

**_Song End, Next Song_**

**Alright**

**I'm laying in bed**

**With a lit cigarette**

**Can't say if last night**

**Was a blonde or brunette**

**Megawatts is on the phone**

**Keeps blowing me up**

**And there's three shots of whiskey**

**In my coffee cup**

**I'm a bad mutha fucka, heeh**

**(Hehehehe)**

**I'm a bad mutha fucka**

**(I'M A BAD MUTHA FUCKA! Hehehe)**

**I can polish off a bottle**

**In the blink of an eye**

**I can drink all night**

**And not pay a dime**

**Just to soon kick your ass**

**As I take a piss**

**Fuck, even Chuck Norris**

**Don't want none of this**

**I'm a bad mutha fucka (Hehe)**

**I can pick up any chick**

**I meet at the bar**

**I can even take the one**

**Right off of your arm**

**I got a woman at home**

**Got a kid on the way**

**I got a girl in New York**

**And four more in L.A**

**I'm a bad mutha fucka**

**(Mutha fucka, hehehe)**

**I'm a bad mutha fucka (Hehe)**

**(Hahaha)**

**I got hookers by the hand**

**Four-five at a time**

**But they're the ones paying me**

**By the end of the night**

**Pimps hunt me down**

**And try to get the cash**

**And then me and Samuel Jackson**

**Bust a cap in their ass**

**We're bad mutha fuckas (Hæh!)**

**Bad mutha fuckas, come on**

**(Hahaha)**

**Writing bad checks**

**To the I.R.S**

**I'm a master at passing**

**Sobriety tests**

**(Hahaha!)**

**Selling dope to the Hot Topic**

**Kids at the mall**

**I'm like O.J. baby**

**I get away with it all**

**(Hahaha!)**

**It wasn't me**

**(Hahaha!)**

**I'm a bad mutha fucka (Hehehe)**

**And he's in jail mutha fucka, come on**

**I got a room in my house**

**For my ten foot bong**

**I'm pretty sure George Thorogood**

**Wrote me a song**

**I'm a bad, bad, bad**

**To the bone, mutha fucka**

**Bad to the bone**

**(Bad mutha fucka!)**

**There's only one motherfucker that may be badder than me**

**And that would be Rob Corddry**

**(Hahaha)**

**By the way**

**Before I sing this**

**You should know**

**I was raised Catholic**

**But**

**I'm a virgin alterboy**

**(hahaha)**

**I get stoned on sunday**

**Take my grandma to church**

**I pick up all the girls**

**In catholic skirts**

**Tell them that I got**

**A big van full of toys**

**Hell it looks better than the preacher**

**Jerking off little boys**

**He's WORSE than a bad mutha fucka**

**(Hahaha)**

**I'm a bad mutha fucka**

**He's a bad bad man**

**(HAHAHA!)**

**Just saying**

**Don't even know what to call that**

**Burning in hell?**

**My dad is so proud of me, hahaha**

**(Hahaha)**

**_Song End_**

"THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY" Izuku yelled into his microphone ending the show.

**Knuckles: **That was awesome

**Pikachu: **true dat

**Acid Trip: **Anyone notice while they were performing Midori kept stealing glances towards Jiro?

**Deus Ex Machina: **I'm pretty sure it's something musicians do while performing.

**Bass Bitch: **You just keep thinking that.

**Anti-Grav: **Are you being ominous?

**Anti-Grav:** I think she's being ominous.

**Authors Notes:**

**Chapter 4 Answers: "And that is just the first five steps to a prostate-assisted orgasm" is from Deadpool 2. The Jackson Pollock reference was from Guardians Of The Galaxy. The joke is based on the R&B singers sex abuse allagations. Drizella is a strain of weed. And finally the washing machine reference was from the old tv show My Name Is Earl. There is only one reference in chapter 5. As always have fun and catch you later.**


	6. Jealous Pikachu

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Pikachu** \- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Fuck you Kaminari: With A Vengence**

3:00 pm on a Saturday

**Acid-Trip:** So Jiro, Midori, you want to tell everyone what that ominism was about last night?

**Purple Haze:** Wait. You two still haven't told them yet?

**Acid-Trip:** Told us what? I DEMAND YOU TWO SPILL!

**Bass Bitch: **You just had to say something didn't you Shinso.

**Deku:** _Thanks Shinso_

**Acid-Trip: **So wait there is something going on between you two?

**Deku: **Might as well tell em' the truth.

**Bass Bitch: **Fuck, alright. Me and Izuku have been dating for the last few months now.

**Discount Sue Storm: **OMG CONGRATS YOU TWO.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Congratulations you two. I wish you the best.

**Sonic: **While I am happy for you both I must insist you keep all public displays of affection in a private setting.

**Bomberman: **DEKU! HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET A GIRLFRIEND BEFORE ME AND LITERALY ANYONE ELSE?

**Anti-Grav: **I can think of why he succeeded before you **Bomberman**

**Deku:** And that's why we haven't told anyone about it.

**Discount Sue Storm:** How did this even happen anyway?

**Purple Haze: **Go ahead and tell em', I was there, I'll back the facts.

**Deku:** You guys remember a few months ago when Mineta broke his penis when he tried to ride that home-made dirt bike me and Todoroki made after getting wasted?

**Acid-Trip: **remember it,I still watch the video when I need something to laugh at.

**Deku: **The little rat gave me three tickets to an outdoor music festival as a thank you for taking him to the hospital.

**Bomberman: **Figured he'd thank someone for saving his favorite body part.

**Deku: **I invited Shinso cause I figured it would tire him out so he would get a fuckin' nights sleep.

**Purple Haze: **That's why you invited me to that festival?

**Deku: **I then invited the residential music lover as the third person, cause why not?

**Bass Bitch:** We got their late cause traffic was a bitch,so we were stuck kinda far back from the stage.

**Bass Bitch: **This green-haired idiot then decided in his infinite wisdom to lift me onto his shoulders so I could see.

**Deku: **I Regret Nothing.

**Bass Bitch: **And we've been dating ever since then.

**Purple Haze: **It's all true, every word.

**Acid-Trip: **So cute, I'm so happy for the both of you.

**Private Chat betwen Jiro and Midoriya**

**Jax: **You okay with them knowing?

**That Green Gentleman: **I'm cool with it. Besides they were bound to find out eventually.

**Jax: **Cool. Love you, you sadomasochist idiot

**That Green Gentleman: **love you to Kyoka, and sadomasochist?

**Jax: **cause you regularly destroy you body while training.

**Fuck you Kaminari: With A Vengence**

**Pikachu: **What could she see in Midoriya that she doesn't see in any other guy?

**Bomberman: **Why the fuck are you asking stupid questions?

**Acid-Trip: **Are you jealous Kaminari.

**Pikachu: **I'M NOT JEALOUS, I'M JUST CURIOUS!

**Deus Ex Machina: **He's Jealous.

**Froppy **has renamed the chat to **Jealous Pikachu Is Jealous.**

**Pikachu: **Why

**Froppy: **Cause it never gets old.

**Authors Note:**

**Chapter 5 Answers: Uraraka lines about Jiro being ominous was lifted straight from the Community episode Digital Estate Planning.**

**Catch you later.**


	7. Electric Dumbass

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Pikachu** \- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Jealous Pikachu Is Jealous**

3:00 pm on a Sunday

**Knuckles: **Anyone know why there is a windowless brown van outside?

**Acid Trip: **I've been wondering about that.

**Deku: **It's mine. Late birthday gift from dad.

**Pikachu: **I think some kids painted the words "Rape Van" on the sides of it.

**Deku:** The thing is.

**Bass Bitch: **Wait for it.

**Deku: **I did that.

**Deku: **Seemed like a good Idea at the time.

**Bomberman: **WHY COULD YOU HAVE POSSIBLY THOUGHT THAT WAS A GOOD IDEA IN THE FIRST PLACE?

**Pikachu **has changed** Deku**'s username to** Green Mineta**

**Green Mineta **has changed his username to **Deku**

**Deku** has changed **Pikachu**'s username to **Electric Dumbass**

**Deku: **I was going to say it's because the locks are broken and I don't want anyone breaking in.

**Deku: **Would you want to break into a van if you thought you would be raped by the owner.

**Bass Bitch:** You were high weren't you?

**Deku: **I will neither confirm nor deny that.

**Electric Dumbass: **Why can't I change my username back?

**Deku: **You forgot I created this chat room didn't you? I god mod privileges and I disabled your abilities to change usernames multiple times, granted I did have to change the settings on your phone also.

**Electric Dumbass: **How did you even get my phone?

**Bass Bitch: **Are you being serious right now?

**Thermostat: **You literally leave it in the living room or on the kitchen counter every day.

**Deku: **It's true you always leave it in weird places. I happened to find it in the freezer.

**Deus Ex Machina:** You shouldn't be so careless.

**Deku: **Oh and Kaminari, delete your browser history.

**Electric Dumbass: **Midoriya why?

**Deku: **God Dammit man think of your mother.

**Electric Dumbass: **I'm not jerking off now.

**Bass Bitch: **….

**Bass Bitch: **Jesus Christ man you got issues.

**Purple Haze: **So how bad was his history?

**Deku: **This Bad.  /view/raiders-of-the-lost-ark-face-melt-bloody-gif-3579922

**Bomberman: ** /Delete+my+browser+history/funny-pictures/5577825/1

**Acid Trip: **Bakugo sending memes?

**Knuckles: ** /gifs/community-troy-barnes-donald-glover-kojJ5hf9DluM0

**Acid Trip: **I think Kiri might be drunk.

**Knuckles: ** memes/detail/1637519?refGallery=tags&page=1&tag=trailer%20park%20boys

**Authors Note:**

**Chapter 6 Answers: The broken penis is a reference to Johnny Knoxville who broke his penis in the exact same way. And That Green Gentleman is a song by Panic! At The Disco.**

**Later**


	8. Movie Night

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Electric Dumbass **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**WARNING: SOME OF THE STUFF IN THIS CHAPTER IS EXTREMELY DARK. iF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ IT I HAVE MARKED WHERE IT BEGINS AND WHERE IT ENDS. ME, AND DON'T ENDORSE OR CONDONE THE ACTIVITIES MENTIONED IN THIS CHAPTER. IF THIS OFFENDS ANYONE I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE BUT YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. **

**Jealous Pikachu Is Jealous**

5:00 pm on a Monday

**Electric Dumbass: **Anyone up for a movie night?

**Sonic: **It's monday.

**Deku: **That's more of a friday or saturday activity.

**Electric Dumbass: **I didn't mean tonight.

**Deku: **When then?

**Electric Dumbass: **Friday night good for everyone?

**Bass Bitch: **I got nothing better to do.

**Deku: **I'm in

**Acid Trip: **I thought we agreed, no more movie nights.

**Bass Bitch: **Only so Mineta would stop suggesting porno movies and he's not here anymore so…..

**Acid Trip: **MOVIE NIGHTS BACK ON.

**WARNING: YOU HAVE REACHED THE DARK STUFF. PROCEED WITH CAUTION**

**Bass Bitch: **BTW Kaminari, what ever happened to Mineta. I figured you kept in touch, you know cause perves stick together.

**Electric Dumbass: **Last I heard he was arrested for masterbaiting with a watermelon on a street corner while shouting obscenities at women and the elderly.

**Deku: **Close it was an eggplant, not a watermelon.

**Electric Dumbass: **How do you know that.

**Deku: **Cause my mother was one of the women he shouted at. She's also the one who called the police.

**Deku: **Also that perv didn't have the arm strength to hold a watermelon for that long.

**Bomberman: **HE DID WHAT TO AUNTY INKO? I SHOULD GO INTO HIS JAIL CELL OR HALFWAY HOUSE AND BEAT HIS ASS SO HARD HE WON'T EVEN BE RECOGNIZABLE AS A HUMAN.

**Knuckles: **Just like Henry Cavil in Justice League.

**Deku:** Don't worry about it Kachan. Besides, from what I heard he was sentenced as an adult so I guess he finally got to experience sex, just not in the way he expected.

**Bomberman: **Deku what do you mean by that ...oh now I get it.

**Electric Dumbass: **I'm sorry, but I'm completely lost.

**Bass Bitch: **I think what their trying to say is….

**Bass Bitch: **Mineta is now the eggplant.

**Electric Dumbass: **I would feel bad for him but he did kind of bring it on himself

**Deku: **True

**END OF THE DARK STUFF WE NOW TAKE YOU BACK TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED CHAPTER.**

**Electric Dumbass: **Anyone got any suggestions for a movie this Friday? Cause I was gonna suggest Die Hard.

**Anti-Grav: **I feel like we watched that one recently.

**Deku:** We didn't watch it, we literally lived out Die Hard last summer. Remember?

**Acid Trip: **Wait, WHAT?

**Deku: **Right you and several others weren't there.

**Deku: **Long story short me, Kachan, Lida, Uraraka, Yaoyorozu, Kyoka, Todoroki, Kirishima, Kaminari and Mineta basically lived out the plot of Die Hard during the I-Island incident.

**Bass Bitch: **Complete with terrorists looking to steal some powerful and valuable device, scaling the outside of a building, a rooftop fight, and our Bruce Willis ending up shirtless.

**Froppy: **Who was your Bruce Willis?

**Anti-Grav: **Deku was Bruce Willis.

**Bomberman:** And that metal wolf guy was Alan Rickman.

**Electric Dumbass: **Holly shit we did live out Die Hard. I can now die a happy man.

**Deku: **If I might be able to suggest something.

**Bomberman: **Nobody wants to see some hero movie or a documentary Deku.

**Anti-Grav: **He's right Deku. oh my god, I actually agreed with Bakugo on something. Give me a sec here.

**Bass Bitch: **Anyone knows what that was about?

**Deus Ex Machina: **She's checking her pulse, sniffing the air and pinching herself.

**Anti-Grav: **Ok, I'm not dying and in some weird dying dream, I'm not having a stroke and this is not a dream.

**Deku: **Well fuck you guys to. I was gonna suggest we watch Pulp Fiction.

**Bomberman:** Oh

**Anti-Grav: **Sorry Deku

**Deku:** it's alright. Like my dad says when he's been drinking "Well sweet sarsaparilla and suck my own dick" He's an alcoholic. The fun kind. Remember Kachan?

**Bomberman: **It's true. His dad would drink a bottle of Old Grandad and let me and Deku hit him with random things.

**Deku: **Baseball bats, pepper spray, bear repellent, cattle prods and at one point a tube-sock full of arcade tokens.

**Bomberman: **A side effect of fire breathing is a regenerating factor to heal burns and other wounds.

**Deku: **Remember when we actually broke a wooden baseball bat on his chest?

**Bomberman:** Yeah. Does he still drink that much?

**Deku:** Yeah but he switched the whiskey for vodka. Doctor's orders.

**Bomberman: **Here's to you Uncle Hisashi, you crazy drunk Irish bastard.

**Anti-Grav: **Wait Deku's Irish?

**Deku: **Half on dad's side. I'm not sure what mom is.

**French Fry: **You learn something new everyday. That just leaves me to ask….

**Deku: **No, I will not teach you how to make vodka out of potatoes.

**Electric Dumbass: **You can do that?

**Deku: **You can make any fruit or vegetable into a type of alcohol. Potatoes for vodka. Corn for whiskey. Your fruits are used for wines. Agave is used for tequila. And of course your grains like wheat, rye and barley for beer.

**Sonic: **Midoriya, how is it you know all this?

**Deku: **I'm Irish, we have been perfecting the means to get drunk for centuries. Duh.

**Authors Note: Chapter 7 Answers: The Rape van and the reasons behind it was from Workaholics. Midoriya telling Kaminari to delete his history was from Doctor Who and the memes used were taken from Raiders of The Lost Arc, Cyanide and Happiness, Community and Trailer Park Boys. Again I apologize for the dark turn this took in the beginning. That might be the darkest thing I have ever written at this point.**

**Later**


	9. The Noodle Incident

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Electric Dumbass **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Jealous Pikachu Is Jealous**

7:00 pm on a Thursday

**Deku: **Again, I apologize for the incident yesterday and let's move on.

**Electric Dumbass: **All is forgiven but still I didn't know anyone could do that.

**Bass Bitch: **You'd be surprised what Izuku can get up to while cross faded.

**Purple Haze: **I'm still wondering where he got the rockets. The roller skates I understand, but don't you need to be 18 years old to get fireworks.

**Bomberman: **I'm just wondering if the donkey survived.

**Knuckles: **I'm more shocked that it led to a lifetime ban from all the Burger Kings in the world.

**Deku: **I see that as a complete win. Those tacos are disgusting, and the sauce alone will make your heart feel like it's going to rip out of your chest like that scene in Alien with John Hurt and the chest burster.

**Bomberman: **It's a fucking burger resturaunt, why are they selling tacos?

**Sonic: **What happened exactly?

**Anti-Grav: **This has to be a good story.

**Deku: **None of us are aloud to say what happened at the Burger King. Court order.

**Deus Ex Machina: **What exactly were you even planning in the first place.

**Deku: **I don't even remember what I originally planned. Just that I wanted a slushie and that was the closest place to my mom's apartment. It just so happened I was enjoying a joint at the time and I had been drinking Madd Dogg from a Dixie cup all day.

**Bomberman: **But what about the donkey?

**Deku: **Oh it's dead. It could not have survived that.

**Bass Bitch **has renamed the chat to **Drinks, Drugs and Donkeys 101.**

**Bomberman: **Had to have been less painful then when that kid punched you in the balls.

**Deku: **It was like that scene in One Punch Man.

**Bomberman: **That bad huh?

**Bass Bitch: **I saw an X-Ray of it, one of them ended up retreating to his sternum.

**Ultra Furry: **Why did they X-Ray your balls?

**Tails: **It's standard procedure to X-Ray the entire body if a patient comes in that beaten up.

**Tsukuyomi: **you know, to make sure there is no internal bleeding.

**Electric Dumbass: **I thought the blood was supposed to be on the inside.

**Bomberman: **Not in places in the body where it's not supposed to be. That would lead to a painful and unpleasant death.

**Deku: **Besides my arms and junk there was no other damage to my body.

**Purple Haze: **I'm pretty sure they were more shocked to see your tattoo.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Wait, Midoriya has a tattoo?

**Purple Haze: **Yeah it was a Pikachu on the inside of his right thigh.

**Bass Bitch: **How did you get to see that area of Izuku anyways?

**Purple Haze: **You forgot that the showers are comunal in the dorms didn't you?

**Deku: **Also friends see each others junk from time to time.

**Froppy: **I don't think that's true?

**Deku: **We must watch different pornos then.

**Bomberman **has changed **Electric Dumbass**'s username to **Deku's Thigh Tattoo**.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **Seriously,WHY?

**Bomberman:** Cause it's funny

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **IT'S NOT FUNNY ANYMORE!

**Deku: **It's still funny.

**Authors Note: Chapter 8 answers: Mineta's crime was taken from the stars tour in GTA V where they showed where Lazlow was arrested for the exact same reason. His prison experiences is a reference to the end of Mallrats with the villains fate. Everyone probably got the Die Hard references. Midoriya and Bakugo hitting Midoriya's dad with various objects to an old Mad TV sketch called Kenny Rogers' Jackass (look it up, it's the funniest thing I have ever seen) His dad getting doctor's orders to switch from whiskey to vodka was a reference to Motorhead's singer and bass player Lemmy switching to vodka at the end of his life on doctor's orders. The line "Well sweet sarsaparilla and suck my own dick" is from The Eric Andre Show.**

**Later**


	10. Drunk Deku

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Drinks, Drugs and Donkeys 101.**

8:00 pm on a Friday

**Bomberman: **Bad news extras. We're gonna have to cancel movie night. There has been an incident.

**Deus Ex Machina: **When you say incident what do you mean?

**Deku: **WHATS UP COCKSUCKERS?

**Discount Sue Storm: **I think it might have to do with that.

**Sonic:** Midoriya, such language is not appropriate in a class setting. What have you to say for yourself?

**Deku: **Yes I do in fact.

**Sonic: **And that being?

**Deku: **Use your speed and hit me from behind.

**Sonic:** ….

**Acid Trip: **Ok, Bakugo, explain.

**Bomberman: **I was gonna say he got a quart of pure moonshine and drank the whole jar full. This is just how he gets when he's drunk.

**Acid Trip: **Is there anything that can sober him up real quick?

**Deku: **Your pink lips and perky tits Pinky Pie.

**Acid Trip: **Should I be more concerned about the fact that he said that, or that I liked it?

**Bomberman: **Don't ask questions like that when he's like this.

**Deus Ex Machina:** It could lead to even more embarrassing moments

**Deku: **Momo. Momo. MOOOOOMOOOOO.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Oh God no.

**Deku: **We could create something together.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Fuck this, I'm out.

**Anti Grav:** Kind of smooth. I give it 8/10.

**Deku: **Have you been using your quirk on me when i'm not looking?

**Anti Grav: **Oh fuck me

**Deku: **Oh I intend to.

**Thermostat: **I'm laughing my ass or right now.

**Deku: **Hey Shoto, is all your hair two separate colors or just the hair on your head?

**Bass Bitch: **Todoroki just set the couch on fire and incased himself in ice.

**Deku: **Hey Kyoka, you want to engage in something fun? You can tie me up with your earphone jacks.

**Bass Bitch: **While that sounds fun, I'm gonna have to respectfully decline. Your drunk and it just wouldn't be right.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **What wouldn't be right?

**Bass Bitch: **Taking advantage of a drunk person, even if it's my boyfriend.

**Bomberman: **Respect.

**Knuckles: **So Manly.

**Acid Trip: **So that means if he was sober you would be into it?

**Bass Bitch: **No, but he won't remember any of this when he sobers up and I want to see the look on his face when he reads up on this so I guess I'm camping outside of his door tonight.

**Discount Sue Storm: **That's not creepy at all Jiro.

**Froppy: **Wait does that mean you two have done things before?

**Bass Bitch: **All I'm saying is second base. That's all you are going to know.

**Acid Trip: **Second base, really? You two have been dating for three months and thats how far you've gone.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **As a man I can say if I were to get to third base, I'd try to take it all the way to home plate. Also it's Midoriya, what do you expect?

**Acid Trip: **He's been pretty aggressive the last few minutes.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **Thats drunk Midoriya, not regular Midoriya.

**Froppy: **You know what they say about alcohol though. It brings your true self out.

**Bomberman: **No it just lowers your inhibitions.

**Bomberman: **I remember one time he stripped down to his underwear, jumped on a kitchen counter and started singing the song Enormous Penis by Da Vinci's Notebook.

**Knuckles: **Realy?

**Bass Bitch: **Please tell me you took a video?

**Bomberman: **I did. Fortunately his dad and uncle joined him and it was before the Pikachu Tattoo. I got a video of him getting the tattoo also if your interested.

**Anti-Grav: **What's Deku's uncle like?

**Bomberman: **Somehow he's dumber than Lumpy from Happy Tree Friends. He at one point left out his gun and his two year old son got it and shot him in the balls. Deku's uncle, not himself and Deku wasn't born yet at that point.

**Bomberman: **I think his wife divorced him at that point and managed to get full custody of Sean. I think he's a let's player on youtube now.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **Midoriya's family is awesome.

**Acid Trip: **I would very much like to see those videos.

**Bomberman: **Well Deku has finally passed out. Just let me leave him some Gatoraid and some Tylenol and flip him on his side and I'll bring down both videos.

**Acid Trip: **This is gonna be so great.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **Anyone want to talk about the fact that Bakugo took care of drunk Midoriya?

**Bass Bitch: **Nobody has a deathwish idiot.

**Bomberman: **Also I don't want him Hendrixing.

**Knuckles: **Hendrixing?

**Bass Bitch: **Choking on your own vomit in your sleep. It's how Jimi Hendrix died.

**Bomberman: **Better then how Deku's uncle died.

**Bass Bitch: **How did he die?

**Bomberman: **He was on one of those double decker buses in London. The bus hit a pothole and he fell down the stairs and broke his neck.

**Bass Bitch: **How was that worse?

**Bomberman: **The way he landed looked like he was trying to blow himself.

**Authors Note: Chapter 9 Answers: The chapter name, Noodle incident, is something from the past that is sometimes referred to but never explained, with the implication that it's just too ludicrous for words—or perhaps too offensive for depiction—and the reality that any explanation would fall short of audience expectations. Questions about it are often met with "You Don't Want To Know…" drinking Madd Dogg from a Dixie cup is from GameSocietyPimps' Christopher Walkenthrough series. I kind of gave you the One Punch Man Reference.**

**Later**


	11. The Rock Show 2

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Drinks, Drugs and Donkeys 101.**

7:00 pm on a Saturday

**Deku: **I apologize for everything that i might have said or done yesterday let's move on.

**Knuckles: **You got drunk, hit on us, passed out, woke up and suplexed Kaminari.

**Bass Bitch: **Not that were complaining.

**Knuckles: **Recovery Girl said the back brace will come off tomorrow.

**Deku: **I now have to go to regular AA meetings now thanks to that.

**Bomberman: **That's probably a good thing.

**Deku: **Those meeting are depressing AF.

**Bass Bitch: **how long do you have to go to those meetings?

**Deku: **Twice a week for one month.

**Bomberman: **Now with that out of the way, roof, now, EVERYBODY.

The students of 1-A made there way to the roof and saw the members of Sex Bob-Omb with their instruments and for some reason Shinso was holding a set of bagpipes. Izuku then yelled out "WE'RE SEX BOB-OMB AND WE'RE HEAR TO MAKE YOU THINK ABOUT DEATH AND GET SAD AND STUFF" With that the band started playing. Nothing could have prepared them.

**_Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced_**

**I play in a band, we're the best in the land**

**We're big in both Chelsea and France**

**I play one mean guitar and then score at the bar**

**There's a line of chicks waiting for their chance**

**So come on now honey, I'll make you feel pretty**

**These other gals mean nothing to me**

**Let's finish these drinks and be gone for the night**

**'Cause I'm more than a handful, you'll see**

**So kiss me, I'm shitfaced**

**I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown**

**In the trousers, she kissed me**

**And I only bought her one round**

**I can bench press a car, I'm an ex-football star**

**With degrees from both Harvard and Yale**

**Girls just can't keep up, I'm a real love machine**

**I've had far better sex while in jail**

**I designed the Sears Tower, I make two grand an hour**

**I cook the world's best duck flambé**

**I'll take the pick of the litter, girls jockey for me**

**I don't need these lines to get laid**

**So kiss me, I'm shitfaced**

**I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown**

**In the trousers, she kissed me**

**And I only bought her one round**

**I'm a man of the night, a real ladies delight**

**See my figure was chiseled from stone**

**One more for the gal then I'll escort her home**

**Come last call, I'm never alone**

**I've a house on the hill with a red water bed**

**That puts Hugh Hefner's mansion to shame**

**With girls by the pool and Italian sports cars**

**I'm just here in this dump for the game**

**So kiss me, I'm shitfaced**

**I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown**

**In the trousers, she kissed me**

**And I only bought her one round**

**So kiss me, I'm shitfaced**

**I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown**

**In the trousers, she kissed me**

**And I only bought her one round**

**Ahh, fuck it. Who am I shitting?**

**I'm a pitiful sight, and I ain't all that bright**

**I'm definitely not chiseled from stone**

**I'm a cheat and a liar, no woman's desire**

**I'll probably die cold and alone**

**But just give me a chance, 'cause deep down inside**

**I swear I got a big heart of gold**

**I'm a monogamous man, no more one night stands**

**Come on, honey, let me take you home**

**So kiss me, I'm shitfaced**

**I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown**

**In the trousers, she kissed me**

**And I only bought her one round**

**So kiss me, I'm shitfaced**

**I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown**

**In the trousers, she kissed me**

**And I only bought her one round**

**So kiss me, I'm shitfaced**

**I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown**

**In the trousers, she kissed me**

**And I only bought her one round**

**So kiss me, I'm shitfaced**

**I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown**

**In the trousers, she kissed me**

**And I only bought her one round**

**_Boyz In The Hood_**

**Woke up quick at about noon**

**Just thought that I had to be in Compton soon**

**I gotta get drunk before the day begins**

**Before my mother starts bitchin' about my friends**

**About to go and damn near went blind**

**Young niggas on the pad throwin' up gang signs**

**I went in the house to get the clip**

**With my Mac10 on the side of my hip**

**I bailed outside and I pointed my weapon**

**Just as I thought, the fools kept steppin**

**I jumped in the fo' hit the juice on my ride**

**I got front and back side to side**

**Then I let the alpine play**

**I was pumpin' new shit by NWA**

**It was "Gangster Gangster" at the top of the list**

**Then I played my own shit, it went somethin' like this:**

**Cruisin' down the street in my 6-fo'**

**Jockin' the bitches, slappin' the ho's**

**I went to the park to get the scoop**

**Knuckle-heads out there cold shootin' some hoop**

**A car pulls up, who can it be?**

**The fresh El Camino rollin Kilo G**

**He rolls down the window and he starts to say**

**It's all about makin' that G.T.A**

**Cuz the boyz in the hood are alwayz hard**

**Come talkin' that trash and we'll pull your card**

**Knowin' nothin' in life but to be legit**

**Don't quote me boy, I ain't said shit ...**

**Bored as hell and I wanna get ill**

**So I go to a place where my homeboyz chill**

**The fellas out there try to make that dollar**

**I pulled up in the 6-4 impala**

**Greeted with a 40 and I start drinkin'**

**And from the 8-ball my breath start stinkin'**

**I gotta get my girl to rock that body**

**Before I left I hit the bacardi**

**Pulled to the house get her out of the pad**

**And the bitch said something to make me mad**

**She said somethin' that I couldn't believe**

**So I grabbed the stupid bitch by her nappy ass weave**

**She started talkin' shit, would'nt you know?**

**I reached back like a pimp and I slapped the ho'**

**And her father stood up and he started to shout**

**So I threw a right-cross and knocked his old ass out**

**Cuz the boyz in the hood are alwayz hard**

**Come talkin' that trash and we'll pull your card**

**Knowin' nothin' in life but to be legit'**

**Don't quote me boy, I ain't said shit ...**

**Punk ass trippin IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT**

**Homies score a key, gonna fly, punk ass fly**

**_Val Kilmer_**

**I always thought my movie**

**Would be a comedy**

**Not quite the tragedy that its become**

**More slapstick than chickflick**

**More Caddyshack than Breakfast At Tiffany's**

**So, thank me at the podium**

**For a lifetime of contribution**

**Turn on the cameras**

**Someone cue the extras**

**Hair and makeup to the set**

**Because the big screen's calling**

**Final casting call**

**Its your big shot baby your the next big star**

**Of another stupid movie**

**'bout a guy with a broken heart**

**Is falling apart**

**Your headed for the cutting room floor**

**And in the sequel honey**

**I'm the guy who gets the girl**

**So if you miss my movie**

**Get the DVD**

**Check out the chemistry**

**Between you and me**

**Less 'Raising Arizona'**

**More 'Steel Magnolias'**

**So when you walk down that red carpet**

**I hope you trip and fall**

**I hope someone squirts you with a watergun**

**A super soaker filled with pee**

**Because the big screen's calling**

**Final casting call**

**Its your big shot baby your the next big star**

**Of another stupid movie**

**About a guy with a broken heart**

**Is falling apart**

**Your headed for the cutting room floor**

**And in the sequel honey**

**I'm the guy who gets the girl**

**All apologies**

**To Kevin Costner**

**And that chick from monster**

**Give me Adam Sandler**

**Will Ferrell, Belushi and even Val Kilmer**

**He was funny in 'Real Genius'**

**"What about 'Top Gun'?"**

**"No, 'Top Gun' wasn't funny"**

**"Whatever"**

**Top secret was funny too**

**But he sucked as Batman**

**Because the big screen's calling**

**Final casting call**

**Its your big shot baby your the next big star**

**Of another dumb movie**

**About a guy with a broken heart**

**I'm falling apart**

**Steven Spielberg's calling and he's sending a car**

**It's your big shot baby, you're the next big star**

**Of another stupid movie**

**About a guy with a broken heart**

**Who's falling apart**

**Your headed for the cutting room floor**

**But in the sequel honey**

**I'm the guy who gets the girl**

**I'm the guy that gets the girl**

**That gets the girl**

**I'm the guy that gets the girl**

**Adam Sandler, Will Ferrell, Belushi and Akroid, Chris Farley, Bill Murray in 'Stripes'**

**Eddie Murphy till 90, Chris Rock and John Candy, the cast of Hollywood Knights**

**Mike Myers, Jim Carrey and the Farelly Brothers are more my style**

**'Terms of Endearment' I didn't get it**

**I'd much rather shut up and smile**

**_American You_**

**Man, you got it all worked out**

**Don't you? Old pair of shoes**

**Never wear your heart on your sleeve**

**Cause it don't go with the suit**

**You got a bad, bad woman with a young little pretty face**

**They told you not to go get married**

**But you went and did it anyway**

**Singin', oh sweet sounds of American you**

**Never miss a Sunday service, never got tattoos**

**Every time we drive by wavin', I see right through**

**Doo doo doo doo doo doo, fuck you too**

**Mama said steer clear of the devil**

**So you never played in the road**

**Always lookin' on the bright side**

**So you never see the potholes**

**You got a house on a hill**

**Big news, that's a big deal**

**Big party with your big time friends**

**Man, imagine how that feels**

**Singin', oh sweet sounds of American you**

**Never miss a Sunday service, never got tattoos**

**Every time we drive by wavin', I see right through**

**Doo doo doo doo doo doo, fuck you too**

**Doo doo doo doo doo doo, fuck you too**

**I believe in the modest dream, ain't lookin' for a pot of gold**

**A 6 pack and some good marijuana, I can watch my mama roll**

**I believe I could buy a few things like a house with a nice pool**

**Invite my nobody friends to the party and we'll pee in it, fuck you**

**You got a blue-collar father who drinks Budweiser out the bottle**

**20 dollars, an old Impala, a baby's mama**

**You work hard, you don't beg, you don't borrow**

**Night at the factory, daytime job at McDonald's**

**Your daddy told you that girl was nothin' but a problem**

**But you fell in love 'cause to you she was like a supermodel**

**And they told you not to go get married**

**But you went and did it anyway**

**It ain't no problem**

**You make somethin' out of nothin', you make money for a livin'**

**Pushin' buttons, diggin' ditches, flippin' burgers in the kitchen**

**With the vision, you've been dreamin', you've been savin'**

**You've been given nothin' but shit**

**But you take it cause you're patient in this prison**

**Fuck everybody dissin', it ain't them who gotta live in this skin**

**With all these tattoos that you got that fuckin' offends them**

**If it's you that I'm speakin' to, you must be my extension**

**I take my drink up and sip it, take my hat off and tip it**

**Slumerican**

**Oh sweet sounds of American you**

**Never miss a Sunday service, never got tattoos**

**Every time we drive by wavin', I see right through**

**Doo doo doo doo doo doo, fuck you too**

**Doo doo doo doo doo doo, fuck you too**

**_That Green Gentleman (Things Have Changed)_**

**Things are shaping up to be pretty odd**

**Little deaths in musical beds**

**So it seems I'm someone I've never met**

**You will only hear these elegant crimes**

**Fall on your ears from criminal dimes**

**They spill unfound from a pretty mouth**

**And everybody gets there, everybody gets their**

**And everybody gets their way**

**I never said I missed her when everybody kissed her**

**Now I'm the only one to blame**

**Things have changed for me, and that's okay**

**I feel the same, I'm on my way and I say**

**Things have changed for me, and that's okay**

**I want to go where everyone goes**

**I want to know what everyone knows**

**I want to go where everyone feels the same**

**I never said I'd leave the city**

**I never said I'd leave this town**

**A falling out we won't tiptoe about**

**Well, everybody gets there, everybody gets their**

**And everybody gets their way**

**I never said I missed her when everybody kissed her**

**Now I'm the only one to blame**

**Things have changed for me, and that's okay**

**I feel the same, I'm on my way and I say**

**Things have changed for me, and that's okay**

**I feel the same, and I say**

**Things have changed for me (Well, things have changed for me)**

**And that's okay (Come on, everybody, let's dance and sing)**

**I feel the same (I'm singing it all night long)**

**And I say (Come on, everybody, yeah, join along, I'm singing)**

**Things have changed for me (Well, things have changed for me)**

**And that's okay (Come on, everyone, let's dance and sing)**

**I feel the same (I'm singing it all night long)**

**And I say (Come on, everybody, yeah, sing along)**

**Things have changed for me**

**And that's okay**

**I'm on my way and I say**

**Things have changed for me**

**_Concert End_**

"THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY" Izuku yelled ending the concert

**Drinks, Drugs and Donkeys 101.**

**Deku: **Ok I played one of the songs of my people.

**Acid Trip: **I can't believe you played an Eazy-E song with acoustic guitars.

**Knuckles: **So manly.

**Froppy: **Is nobody going to say anything about Midoriya saying the N-word?

**Deku: **I will not censor myself when singing someone else's words.

**Deku: **Besides, Mel Gibson said way worse and people still enjoy his movies.

**Bomberman: **FUCK MEL GIBSON!

**Purple Haze **has renamed the chat **FUCK YOU MEL GIBSON!**

**Purple Haze: **Well that's a thing now.

**Authors Note: Chapter 10 Answers: Deku's opening line was Tifa's first line in TeamFourStar's Final Fantasy VII Machinabridged series (Fun Fact: Justin Briner the english VA for Deku also voices Cloud in Final Fantasy VII Machinabridged) some of the lines said by Drunk Deku were from Sonnie Celanna's story Class 1-mAyday (A Chatroom fic) check it out there's the baseball dating metaphor. His uncle getting shot in the balls is a reference to Trailer Park Boys. His cousin is a reference to Jacksepticeye, cause one of the reviews mentioned him. His uncle's death is a reference to a Demitri Martin joke about double decker buses.**

**Songs Used:**

**Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced by Dropkick Murphies**

**Boyz In The Hood by Eazy-E (Covered by Dynamite Hack)**

**Val Kilmer by Bowling For Soup**

**American You by Yelawolf**

**That Green Gentleman (Things Have Changed) by Panic! At The Disco**

**Later**


	12. Cards Against Humanity

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**FUCK YOU MEL GIBSON!**

3:00 pm on a Sunday

**Knuckles:** So anyone up to play a game?

**Sonic: **Kirishima, is this the best use of our time?

**Knuckles: **Considering its 3:00 on a sunday, yes.

**Acid Trip: **What were you wanting to play Kiri?

**Knuckles: **Cards Against Humanity

**Acid Trip: **I'm in

**Bomberman: **Sounds fun, I'm in

**Bass Bitch: **This should be fun.

**Anti-Grav: **I've never played before. I want in.

**Froppy: **I'm in.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **So in.

**Deus Ex Machina: **I'm in also

**Thermostat: **Same

**Deku: **Sounds fun.

**Knuckles: **Common Room, five minutes

"Ok here goes. I may not be much to look at, but I fuck like BLANK." Kirishima read to the group. Within seconds the other nine put down their white cards. "I may not be much to look at, but I fuck like, "Republicans" "Grammar nazis who are alsop regular nazis", "Happy Daddies with happy sandals", "Hipsters", "Vikings", "A man on the brink of orgasm", "Lady Gaga", "The hottest MILF in Dallas" kirishima read out. "I'm gonna have to give it to Happy Daddies with happy sandals" Kirishima answered. "Yes" Mina said while grabbing the black card.

"Why can't I sleep at night?" Momo read from a black card. After a minute all white cards were sent in. "Why can't I sleep at night? "Gay thoughts" "Forty-five minutes of finger blasting" "The sound of my roommate masturbating" "Mogan Freeman's voice" "Masturbation" "Goblins" Crystal meth" Momo read out. "Forty-five minutes of finger blasting wins this round." Momo announced. "Cool" Kirishima said getting his black card.

"Yeah that's so hot. I'm so close. Talk about BLANK again! OH I'M CUMMING!" Tsuyu read out loud. "How sad it will be when Morgan Freeman dies" "BATMAN!" "Lou Gehrig's Disease" "Daniel Radcliffe's delicious asshole" "Authentic Mexican cuisine" "Flightless birds" "Kids with ass cancer" Mouth herpes" ''this has to go to BATMAN! Ribbit" Tsuyu said to the group. "Alright" Jiro said while claiming the black card

"Whats my ultimate fantasy?" Jiro read out. "Fucking me good and taking me to Red Lobster" "Pussy lips of all sizez" "Teaching my son to love the Red Socks and hate minorities" "David Bowie flying in on a tiger made of lightning" "The vagina hole" "Having your titties sucked while sucking on titties" "Wringing out a sopping wet maxi pad into Donald Trump's mouth" "Getting your ass ate" "Ok no doubt about it but Wringing out a sopping wet maxi pad into Donald Trump's mouth wins this" Jiro said. No one said anything as Izuku grabbed the black card.

"What brought the orgy to a grinding halt?" Ururaka read out. "Pedophiles" "Running out of semen" "Seeing grandma naked" "Getting naked and watching Nickelodeon" "Jerking off into a pool of children's tears" "Child protection services" "Licking that pussy right" "A gentle caress of the inner thigh" Ururaka read. "Child protection services wins this." Izuku grabbed another card. "What the fuck is going on?" Bakugo asked.

"James is a lonely boy. But when he discovers a secret door in his attic he meets a magical new friend" Mina read from a black card. "Oh God, this is so bad, I have to give it to this one, I'm gonna have to read it aloud. James is a lonely boy. But when he discovers a secret door in his attic he meets a magical new friend: Anne Frank." Mina said. Everyone lost their shit as Izuku grabbed the black card while laughing his ass off. "I think we're done with this today." Kirishima said.

**FUCK YOU MEL GIBSON!**

**Bass Bitch: **That's my favorite green haired idiot

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **You seem awfully excited about Midoriya having a fucked sense of humor.

**Bass Bitch: **I'm so proud of him

**Knuckles: **ok, who are you and what have you done to Jiro?

**Deus Ex Machina: **Relax Kirishima.

**Deku: **What's going on now?

**Anti-Grav: **Your girlfriend is practically drooling about you having a messed up sense of humor.

**Bomberman: **Control your woman you Irish fuck

**Deku: **You had to bring up that I'm Irish this time. You just needed to have something procede fuck didn't you?

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST GET HER TO STOP.

**Deku: **Alright.

**Acid Trip: **Ok Midori just came in doing his lightning thing and just picked up Jiro and ran off.

9:00 pm on a sunday

**Deku: **Ok she's passed out.

**Bomberman: **What exactly did you do for several hours?

**Deku: **That's between me and her.

**Knuckles: **Look at Midoriya, protecting his GF's privacy. So manly.

**Deku: **It did involve a few joints and a copy of Pink Floyd's The Wall.

**Bomberman:** I thought you were in AA

**Deku: **That's just for drinking, not weed.

**Deku: **It's called AA for a reason.

**Anti-Grav:** He has a point.

**Acid Trip: **How was the meeting this morning Midori.

**Deku: **Depressing, one guy was all like alcohol ruined my life, alcohol made me burn my house down. That's not alcohol, that's crack. When I get drunk I just want to take my pants off and sing.

**Bomberman: **I have the video to prove it.

**Deku: **It's not always Enormous Penis and it's not always on your mother's birthday.

**Acid Trip: **Wait his mother's birthday?

**Deku: **Kachan's mother. She seemed to enjoy the show. She was throwing singles at me the whole time.

**Bomberman: **She was drunk to. I think.

**Anti-Grav: **You think she was drunk or she was drunk.

**Deku: **She was drunk. She tried to order a pizza using a gamecube controller.

**Bomberman: **She also tried to give me and Deku the sex talk.

**Deku: **I don't know what the Alligator Fuckhouse is but I'm sure after that bit is when I started drinking.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo **has renamed the chat to **Alligator Fuckhouse**

**Deku: **Why?

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **Cause you almost broke my spine, dick.

**Knuckles: **Seems like a fitting revenge. BTW I looked up what an Alligator Fuckhouse is

**Purple Haze: **What is it?

**Knuckles: **one person bites the neck of the other, locks their arms and legs down and goes into a deathroll, all while maintaining insertion.

**Deku: **How?

**Knuckles: **Urban Dictionary.

**Bass Bitch: **Of course.

**Deku: **Oh hey you're awake. You should get back to sleep.

**Bass Bitch: **Kind of hard to sleep when your phone keeps pinging every few seconds.

**Bass Bitch: **Also I might need something warm to cuddle up to so I can get back to sleep.

**Deku: **Alright night everybody.

**Authors Note: chapter 11 answers: Fuck you Mel Gibson refrences the fact that Mel Gibson is a racist, anti-semetic asshole.**

**Later**


	13. Digging Up The Past

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Alligator Fuckhouse**

7:00 pm on a monday

**Deku: **Oh God what have I done?

**Anti-Grav: **What's wrong, Deku?

**Deku: **Kyoka was playing Sims 4 on my gaming PC.

**Anti-Grav: **That seems like a completely normal thing.

**Deku: **I kinda had some mods installed and well….

**Bomberman:** What he's trying to say is that he had some sex mods installed and the gf played them. Am I right on this one Deku?

**Deku: **Right on the fucking head Kachan.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **So Jiro played what is essentially a porn game you had on your PC?

**Deku: **Uh, yeah.

**Bass Bitch: **Hey, Izuku, just relax. Besides it's completely normal to have an interest in sexual matters. Didn't they teach you that in sex ed?

**Bomberman: **Actually, due to Deku being a late bloomer and being technically quirkless our school didn't bother letting him take sex ed cause they thought he wasn't what they considered "Breeding Material"

**Bass Bitch: **That's horrible. The fact that a school would do that to a student. It's just wrong.

**Anti-Grav: **Did your family do anything to the school for that?

**Deku: **They are trying to get a lawyer to take the case.

**Knuckles: **MidoriBro seriously, how are you so normal?

**Deku: **Liquor and weed mostly. Violent video games help also.

**Acid Trip: **So getting back to something lighter, Midori, your a PC gamer, right?

**Deku: **Yeah. I like mods as you can tell.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **I prefer Xbox. Less expensive.

**Acid Trip: **Playstation here.

**Sonic: **I thought Xbox and Playstation allowed modding now?

**Deku: **Only for like two games, Skyrim Remastered and Fallout 4 allowed modding but not to the extent of what can be done on PC.

**Anti-Grav: **What do you mean Deku?

**Deku: **Well with some mods I installed on GTA V add things like zombie apocalypse or the Green Goblin and his glider and weapons from Spider-Man. And I mean the awesome Green Goblin from the 2002 movie and not the shitty one from the Amazing Spider-Man 2.

**Tsukuyomi: **Revelry in the dark.

**Purple Haze: **Personally I like turning the zombies from Left 4 Dead 2 into teletubbies.

**Froppy: **I always kind of found those things kind of creepy.

**Froppy: **Not Mineta creepy, but still very creepy, like the villian from any kids movie.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Nothing is more creepy then that thing.

**Deku: **I know how creepy he is first hand. I let him borrow the laptop I use for stuff like school projects and that perv somehow managed to download seventeen different porn viruses in less than a half-hour.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **Speaking of that Mineta sent me a text message asking me to send nudes of all you girls. Don't worry, I told him to fuck off. I'm not going to let that perv's demands get me into trouble.

**Bass Bitch: **Please tell me you blocked his number?

**Deku's Thigh Tattoos: **Even better, I have been screencapping all of his messages and posting them on facebook, twitter, instagram, snapchat and tinder all with a picture of him with the caption "DON'T DATE THIS GUY, YOU'LL FIND SOMEONE MUCH BETTER!" I also posted his number on several of those casual encounters websites under the Men Seeking Men section.

**Deku: **Why didn't you just make him a grindr account?

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **Cause that will not affect his day to day life. I'd be the one getting all the messages and dick pics. This way he gets all the dick pics and messages.

**Acid Trip: **I never thought I would say this but good job Kaminari.

**Deku: **Good prank

**Deus Ex Machina:** Normally I would be against your actions but it is Mineta and he does deserve it.

**Bomberman: **Did Ponytail just throw shade?

**Anti-Grav: **You know it. By the way props to you Kaminari.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **Oh, I'm not done yet.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo** has renamed the chat to **Deku's Pornno Collection**

**Deku: **Oh this how you gonna play?

**Deku** has changed **Deku's Thigh Tattoo **to **Pikachu's Idiot Brother**

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother:** Midoriya why?

**Deku: **Oh, I'm not done yet.

**Deku **has renamed the chat to** Fuck You Kaminari 3: THE RECONING**

**Bass Bitch: **There's the Sinnamon Roll I fell in love with.

**Acid Trip: **Izuku Midoriya and Kyoka Jiro, Roast King and Queen of UA.

**Deku: **Better then what I have been called in the past.

**Bomberman: **How many times are you going to make me apologize for calling you a Drug Addicted or Alcohol Addicted or Sex Addicted degenarate?

**Deku: **Just once would be nice.

**Bomberman: **Hm, No.

**Deku: **Go screw yourself Kachan.

**Authors Notes: Chapter 12 answers: Deku's story about AA was from Tracy Morgan's Staying Alive special. I found Alligator Fuckhouse by googleing the phrase "messed up sex moves" Izuku saying Night Everybody is a reference to a reocuring joke from Animaniacs.**


	14. Prostitute or Politician

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Fuck You Kaminari 3: THE RECONING**

5:00 pm on a Tuesday

**Deku:** And that is why the movie American Beauty is pure pornography.

**Froppy: **I never thought about it that way.

**Deus Ex Machina:** Kind of makes one see the movie in a whole new way

**Knuckles: **I never saw it. Not enough fight scenes. Not really my style.

**Acid Trip: **It's true. Remember when we were watching Titanic at movie night and he stood up and said out loud "Where's the fightin'?"

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **Maybe for the next movie night we should just choose some dumb action film.

**Bomberman: **I guess we should ask Deku what he recommends.

**Bomberman: **But no hero films or documentaries.

**Deku: **Let's see dumb action movie, no hero movies or documentaries. Shoot Em' Up. It's dumb, it's an action film and it's got some funny moments.

**Discount Sue Storm: **I think I saw that one with Mina once. Was that the one where King Arthur killed that guy with a carrot.

**Knuckles: **Ok that brings up more questions. Like King Arthur? And how could you kill someone with a carrot?

**Deku: **The actor who played him also played King Arthur in the 2003 movie. Also way better portrait of King Arthur.

**Knuckles: **But the carrot. How did he kill someone with the carrot?

**Deku: **Ok that settles it. Common room. Now. Where watching Shoot Em' Up right now.

7:00 pm on a Tuesday

**Knuckles: **I know it's probably too soon to say it. **BEST. MOVIE. EVER. **

**Anti-Grav: **That wasn't a movie. It was art.

**Sonic: **I find it rather hard to believe that they wouldn't contact a hero or the police about a guy and a gun manufacturer trying to kill a newborn baby.

**Bomberman: **It's a movie four-eyes.

**Deku: **Plus he did clearly explain why in the movie.

**Bass Bitch: **I don't think any politician would sell out his beliefs that quickly.

**Bomberman: **You better believe it Earlobes. Take a look at the politicians in the United States.

**Deku: **That is true. Their president is calling video games a threat to public safety despite the fact he licensed his name and likeness for a video game in the late 90's.

**Deku: **The lesson of today is that all politicians will do or say anything to up their approval ratings.

**Acid Trip:** So all politicians are whores is what your saying.

**Deku: **Yep. Besides, anyone can be a whore. Be it politician or prostitute.

**Deus Ex Machina: **That's an interesting way of putting it.

**Authors Notes: Chapter 13 answers: All the mods mentioned are in fact real. All the references on Sex Ed classes are a shot at how Sex Ed is taught in parts of the United States. The porn viruses are a reference to an encounter I overheard at a computer repair place while picking up a new hard drive. The prank pulled on Mineta is based on an actual prank I was told I could get in trouble if I tried to pull it on another student. Bakugo and Midoriya's conversation at the end was from Archer. Also wrapping up the Hellsing Abridged reference I had going on since the beginning. Go watch Shoot Em' Up It's the best shit movie ever made.**

**Later**


	15. Mineta's Porn Library

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Fuck You Kaminari: THE RECONING**

8:00 pm on a Friday

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **Ok. I think I just realized something

**Bass Bitch: **Why do I suddenly have a feeling of dread?

**Deku: **Kalm down Kyoka. Kaminari explain.

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **Well the thing is…

**Twat Waffle: **DADDY'S BACK YOU BITCHES!

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **That about sums up what I was going to say. You forgot to kick him from the chat.

**Twat Waffle: **So anyone got something to say to me?

**Deku: **So how was it like being a living fleshlight in jail?

**Twat Waffle: **THAT. DIDN'T. HAPPEN.

**Bass Bitch: **Can you sit sown or do you need one of those inflatable donuts?

**Twat Waffle: **YOU QUIET DOWN YOUR NON-EXISTENT TITS!

**Knuckles: **Oh shit.

**Acid Trip: **Any volunteers to tell Mineta's parents about why their son was beaten into a grape and semen flavored paste?

**Twat Waffle: **Wait, What?

**Bomberman: **You can insult Deku all you want, but he will not put up with anyone insulting his girlfriend.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Monoma from 1-B found that out the hard way.

**Anti-Grav: **Could they repair the shattered testicles?

**Discount Sue Storm: **They could fix one, not both of them.

**Twat Waffle: **Nothing you could say could ever make me scared. I survived jail I got nothing to be afraid of suckers.

**Bomberman: **Should we tell him.

**Twat Waffle: **OH GOD, MIDORIYA JUST CRASHED THROUGH MY WALL WITH AN ANGRY LOOK ON HIS FACE. HELP ME SUCKERS!

**Twat Waffle **has been banned from the chat by **Deku**

**Deku: **Don't worry I'm not going to kill him. Chase him, hurt him and give him a scare yes.

**Bass Bitch: **Did you take my taser?

**Deku: **Yeah I took it. I got him tied to a desk chair and well let's see what happens when i introduce taser to balls.

11:00 am on a Saturday

**Deku:** Ok so last night I lost my cool and attacked Mineta in his home. I was in the wrong on this one and I apologize. Also Kyoka, I will get you a new taser.

**Picachu's Idiot Brother: **You nearly shoved a taser up his ass and told him you wanted to know what grape smelled like if cooked from the inside.

**Purple Haze: **You might need some therapy.

**Bomberman: **I'm all for violence against those who deserve it but that may have been a bit too far.

**Sonic:** Oh right, that reminds me.

**Sonic **has invited **Offbrand Batman** to the chat

**Offbrand Batman:** Ok after some complaints from the family of Minoru Mineta and the actions of Midoriya last night any time a student wants to leave campus they are required to have at least one student accompany them. Midoriya you are required to send a letter of apology to the family of Minoru Mineta and attend therapy sessions once a week with Hound Dog. Any refusal to any of these conditions will result in immediate expulsion. Are we clear?

**Deku: **Crystal. Sir.

**Offbrand Batman: **Good.

**Offbrand Batman **has left the chat

**Bass Bitch: **Ok Izuku, you've got AA twice a week, and now therapy once a week. If you keep getting into these incidents you won't have any time to yourself, or me.

**Deku: **At least I only have two weeks of AA left.

**_Private chat between Momo and Jiro_**

**Momo: **Are things going ok for you two?

**Jiro: **Things are going fine between me and Izuku. Just the other night we went to the dirt theatre and watched their showing of the 1978 version of Dawn Of The Dead.

**Momo: **Was it you or him who suggested it?

**Jiro: **He was the one who chose the date but I was the one who took him to the dirt theatre in the first place. It was our first date after all.

**Momo: **Well that sounds fun.

**Jiro: **Are you jealous?

**Momo: **What, no, I'm not jealous.

**Jiro: **Sure

**_Fuck You Kaminari: THE RECONING_**

**Deku: **So anyone want to know what Mineta's room was like?

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Something tells me you'll tell us no matter what we say.

**Deku: **The whole room smelled like the inside of what I assume an adult store viewing area smelled like and for some reason he had his porn collection on display on a bookshelf in alphabetical order also organised by genre. It was like one of those library shelves with the ladder with wheels on it, It was also around like three walls. The fourth one had his tv and shit against it.

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **So your saying he sleeps in a porn library.

**Froppy **has renamed the chat to **Porn Library**

**Acid Trip: **Ok that settles it. Tsu your my new best friend.

**Anti-Grav: **I think Tsu might be everyone's best friend at this point.

**Authors Note: Chapter 14 answers: Clive Owen was the actor from Shoot Em' Up who also played King Arthur in 2003. All the references to US politics was just a way of including some political satire. BTW Donald Trump actually did license his name and image and provided voice over for the game Donald Trump's Real Estate Tycoon (Published by Activision by the way)**

**Later**


	16. The Rock Show 3

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Bold - Izuku singing**

_**Bold Italics - Jiro singing**_

**Bold Underlines - Shinso singing**

**Porn Library**

7:00 pm on a Saturday

**Deku: **And that's why it's called a Montreal Meat Pie.

**Purple Haze: **So basicly it's just four canadians fucking a meat pie?

**Bomberman: **The Fuck. Why?

**Deku: **Cause being in the waiting room at therapy sucks and I like googling weird shit.

**Acid Trip: **Makes sense. You think you guys can perform for us again.

**Deku: **I'm game if the others are.

**Bass Bitch: **I'm cool with it.

**Purple Haze: **I'm in.

**Bomberman: **Fuck it, I'm in. ROOF. NOW.

"YOU ALL KNOW THE DRILL AT THIS POINT!" yelled Izuku as the band started playing

.

**_First World Anarchist_**

_**Screw your rules**_

_**I'm not your tool**_

_**I'm a First World Anarchist**_

_**Stupid signs**_

_**I'll cross those lines**_

_**I'm a First World Anarchist**_

_**If your door says push**_

_**Then I'm pulling**_

_**So don't try to tell me**_

_**What to do**_

_**I'm a First World Anarchist**_

_**10 items or less**_

_**Ring up 11**_

_**Like a First World Anarchist**_

_**No shirt no shoes**_

_**Gimme service**_

_**Society you're so oppressive**_

_**I fight back against the system**_

_**Took my tag**_

_**Off my mattress**_

_**I'm a First World Anarchist**_

_**White pants look great**_

_**After labor day**_

_**On a First World Anarchist**_

_**I drink my wine**_

_**From a beer stein**_

_**I wear my shades**_

_**In the night time**_

_**I wash my face**_

_**With body wash**_

_**My lyrics don't rhyme**_

_**Perfectly**_

_**Society you're so oppressive**_

_**Come join me and fight the system**_

_**Screw your rules**_

_**We're not your tools**_

_**We're First World Anarchists**_

_**We don't follow signs**_

_**We're crossing lines**_

_**We're First World Anarchists**_

_**Nah na na na na na nah**_

**_To Binge_**

_**Waiting by the mailbox, by the train**_

_**Passin' by the hills 'til I hear the name**_

_**I'm looking for a saw to cut the chains in half and all I want is**_

_**Someone to rely on as**_

_**Thunder comes a-rolling down**_

_**Someone to rely on as**_

_**Lightning comes a-staring in again**_

**I'll wait to be forgiven**

**Maybe I never will**

**My star has left me**

**To take the bitter pill**

**That shattered feeling**

**Well, the cause of it's a lesson learned**

**"Just don't know if I could roll into the sea again**

**Just don't know if I could do it all again," she said—it's true"**

_**Waiting in my room, and I lock the door**_

_**I watch the coloured animals across the floor**_

_**And I'm looking from a distance**_

_**And I'm listening to the whispers**_

_**And oh, it ain't the same, when you're falling out of feeling and you're**_

_**Falling in and caught again**_

_**Cau-au-au-aught again**_

**I'm caught again in the mystery**

**You're by my side, but are you still with me?**

**The answer's somewhere deep in it, I'm sorry but you're feeling it**

**But I just have to tell you that I love you so much these days**

**Have to tell you that I love you so much these days, it's true**

**My heart is in economy**

**Due to this autonomy**

**Rolling in and caught again**

**Cau-au-au-aught again**

**Cau-au-au-aught again**

_**(Cau-au-au-aught again)**_

**My heart is in economy**

**Due to this autonomy **_**(Cau-au-au-aught again)**_

**Rolling in and caught again**

**Cau-au-au-aught again**

**_Werewolf Women of the SS_**

**They are the black widows, baby**

**Off the streets of Berlin**

**Pure wolf is the mission**

**She-devils of sin**

**They're in control now**

**Strasser, you are through**

**You are gonna worship**

**Everything that they do**

**Werewolf women of the SS**

**Howl, baby, howl**

**Howl, baby, howl**

**Welcome to number thirteen**

**This is where it begins**

**Up ahead you will suffer**

**Stripping off your skin**

**Here comes the ladies**

**Super women of death**

**Gretchen and little Eva**

**Pure blood on their breath**

**Werewolf women of the SS**

**Howl, baby, howl**

**Howl, baby, howl**

**_Why Don't You Get A Job_**

**My friend's got a girlfriend**

**Man, he hates that bitch**

**He tells me every day**

**He says, "Man, I really gotta lose my chick**

**In the worst kind of way."**

**She sits on her ass**

**He works his hands to the bone**

**To give her money every payday**

**But she wants more dinero just to stay at home**

**Well, my friend, you gotta say**

**"I won't pay, I won't pay ya, no way**

**Na-na, why don't you get a job?"**

**Say, "No way," say, "No way-ya, no way**

**Na-na, why don't you get a job?"**

**I guess all his money, well, it isn't enough**

**To keep her bill collectors at bay**

**I guess all his money, well, it isn't enough**

'**Cause that girl's got expensive taste**

**"I won't pay, I won't pay ya, no way**

**Na-na, why don't you get a job?"**

**Say, "No way," say, "No way-ya, no way**

**Na-na, why don't you get a job?"**

**Well, I guess it ain't easy doing nothing at all**

**But hey man, free rides just don't come along**

**Every day**

**Let me tell you about my other friend now**

**My friend's got a boyfriend**

**Man, she hates that dick**

**She tells me every day**

**He wants more dinero just to stay at home**

**Well, my friend, you gotta say**

**"I won't pay, I won't pay ya, no way**

**Na-na, why don't you get a job?"**

**Say, "No way," say, "No way-ya, no way**

**Na-na, why don't you get a job?"**

**"I won't give you no money, I always pay**

**Na-na, why don't you get a job?"**

**Say, "No way," say, "No way-ya, no way**

**Na-na, why don't you get a job?"**

**Hey!That's something everyone can enjoy**

**_Sad Song_**

**I saw a bad moon risin'**

**We fell asleep for days**

**Until a new sun rises**

**We kept driving for days**

**Oh, for days**

**Ain't it funny how it goes when feelings start to change?**

**We won't fall away til we're laughing to the sad songs playing**

**The tears we're fakin' fade**

**Cause we go a longer way**

**Now were laughin' to a sad song**

**I saw a new sun rising**

**We fell asleep for days**

**Oh, until a bad moon follows**

**We see how far we'll stray**

**Oh, we'll stray**

**Ain't it funny how it goes when feelings start to change?**

**We won't fall away til we're laughing to a sad song playing**

**Tears we're fakin' fade**

**Cause we go a longer way**

**Now were laughin' to a sad song**

**Here we go!**

**Ain't it funny how it goes when feeling start to change?**

**We won't fall away til we're laughing to a sad song playing**

**Tears we're fakin' fade**

**We go our separate ways**

**And we're laughing to a sad song**

**Everybody's laughing to a sad song**

**(Everybody's laughing to a sad song)**

**We're still laughing to a sad song**

**_The Way I Feel Inside_**

**Should I try to hide**

**The way I feel inside**

**My heart, for you?**

**Would you say that you**

**Would try to love me too?**

**In your mind**

**Could you ever be**

**Really close to me?**

**I can tell the way you smile**

**If I feel that I**

**Could be certain, then**

**I would say the things**

**I want to say tonight**

**But 'til I can see**

**That you'd really care for me**

**I will dream**

**That someday you'll be**

**Really close to me**

**I can tell the way you smile**

**If I feel that I**

**Could be certain, then**

**I would say the things**

**I want to say tonight**

**But 'til I can see**

**That you'd really care for me**

**I'll keep trying to hide**

**The way I feel inside**

"Later Bitches" Izuku yelled ending the show.

**Porn Library**

**Acid Trip: **Who knew Shinso was such a good singer?

**Anti-Grav:** And here I thought Deku was the lead singer.

**Thermostat: **You should have seen this coming to be honest.

**Deku: **Glad you enjoyed our performance. BTW Kyoka, you want to maybe go out tomorrow. The AA therapist got arrested for dealing drugs after he tried to sell me meth a few days ago. I'm starting to get some real mixed messages from that place.

**Bass Bitch: **I would love to.

**Bomberman: **Is anyone gonna say anything about the AA therapist selling drugs?

**Knuckles: **That seems oddly specific.

**Authors Note: Chapter 15 answers: "Daddy's back you bitches" was the first spoken line in GTA IV.**

**Songs Used**

**First World Anarchist - The Dollyrots**

**To Binge - Gorillaz ft. Little Dragon**

**Why Don't You Get A Job - The Offspring**

**Sad Song - Troy Baker**

**The Way I Feel Inside - The Zombies**

**Later**


	17. Epic Burn Ward

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Porn Library**

5:00 pm on a Monday

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **And that is why I named my penis that.

**Bass Bitch: **Dude...What the actual fuck is wrong with you?

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **It's a guy thing.

**Bass Bitch: **I don't think that's what Dave Grohl had in mind when he wrote Everlong

**Discount Sue Storm: **I highly doubt all guys do that.

**Deku: **….

**Bomberman:** ….

**Bootleg Spideman:** ….

**Thermostat:** ….

**Knuckles:** ….

**Purple Haze:** ….

**Bass Bitch: **Et Tu Izuku?

**Acid Trip: **I guess it is an actual guy thing.

**Tsukuyomi: **I overheard Mineta calling his Excalibur.

**Deus Ex Machina: **And like that you have ruined King Arthur for me.

**Acid Trip: **Ok why did all of you do that and why do you know what Mineta called his?

**Tsukuyomi: **You do remember that my room was right next to his and the walls were not thick enough to block him out.

**Deku: **He was strangely loud for one person. As to why I did it, it was for a joke at the time and it kind of stuck. And now I will never escape The Cock Ness Monster.

**Anti-Grav: **Eh...8.5 out of 10.

**Bomberman: **The General. Those commercials were annoying AF.

**Discount Sue Storm: **I was expecting him to say The Executioner.

**Bomberman: **Fuck thats actualy better

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Armageddon. I used to play a lot of World Of Warcraft.

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **That'sWoW motherfucker.

**Thermostat: **Pedro.

**Ultra Furry: **Pedro?

**Thermostat: **I name all of my favorite things Pedro.

**Bomberman: **Deku, make sure Icy-Hot gets a vasectomy as soon as possible.

**Deku: **Noted.

**Knuckles: **Lower Horn. I watch a lot of Futurama.

**Acid Trip: **We have to watch that episode as a group one day.

**Purple Haze: **The Clarinet. You can figure out why.

**Anti-Grav: **Anyone else picture him saying that with a completely straight face?

**Tails: **I can't not picture him saying it with a straight face.

**Tsukuyomi: **How did we end up talking about this?

**Deku: **I think someone mentioned the Foo Fighters and their song Everlong was brought up. BTW I've seen Kaminari changing and I think Small Bump would be more accurate.

**Acid Trip: **Toasty

**Bass Bitch: **Flawless Victory.

**Anti-Grav: **FATALITY.

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **Midoriya, WHY?

**Deku: **Cause fuck you thats why. And that's Deku Dice Clay to you.

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **….

**Froppy **has changed **Deku**'s username to **Deku Dice Clay**

**Deus Ex Machina **has renamed the chat to** Epic** **Burn Ward**

**Deku Dice Clay: **You to are the best.

**Froppy: **Thanks for the compliment.

**Deus Ex Machina: **If roasting Kaminari is involved you know I'm in.

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **Why is everyone against me?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Ok everyone maybe we should leave Kaminari alone for a while.

**Pikachu's Idiot Brother: **Thanks Midoriya

**Deku Dice Clay **has changed **Pikachu's Idiot Brother**'s username to **EverSmall**

**Deku Dice Clay: **Starting right now.

**EverSmall: **OK THAT'S IT

**EverSmall **has invited **Offbrand Batman** to the chat

**EverSmall: **Aizawa please tell them to stop making fun of me.

**Offbrand Batman: **Why would I do that? Your suffering is my entertainment and I don't have cable. If you others need any ammo for later according to his parents he cried while getting his school pictures taken, he has an irrational fear of artichokes and he cried while watching Clerks. Have fun.

**EverSmall: **WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?

**Offbrand Batman: **Cause you woke me from my nap. That's why. Oh and Midoriya. Nice username.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Thanks?

**Offbrand Batman **has left the chat

**Acid Trip: **Did Aizawa actually join us in making fun of Kaminari?

**Discount Sue Storm: **I think he did.

**Anti-Grav: **Let's see. No fireballs shooting from the ground. No raining blood or brimstone. And no swarms of locust. The end times are not upon us. Yet.

**Tsukuyomi: **Revelry in the dark.

**Authors Note: Chapter 16 Answers: Montreal Meat Pie is from an old Machinima series called Sonic For Hire (I think Rooster Teeth is doing new episodes of it now) The AA therapist selling drugs was from Paradise PD along with Izuku's comments about it. I forgot to put in the last note that Werewolf Women Of The SS is a Rob Zombie song. I have to know, does anybody look up the songs I put in the rock show chapters? I'm legit curious about that. BTW I feel immense shame from writing this chapter and feel like I need to drown myself in Holy Water or sit down in the shower with a bottle of liquor and Don't Worry, Be Happy playing on repeat.**

**Later**


	18. Kaminari Is A Bunny's Bitch

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku Dice Clay** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**EverSmall **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

7:00 pm on a Wednesday

**Epic Burn Ward**

**Ultra Furry: **Has anyone seen my rabbit?

**Tails: **No

**Sugar Daddy: **No

**French Fry: **No

**Tentacle Hentai: **No

**Bootleg Spiderman: **I think Kaminari is using him to try and pick up chicks.

**Ultra Furry: **He WHAT?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Key word try. As soon as they got to the common room your rabbit bit him in the hand and hid under the couch. I didn't even know rabbits could bite.

**Ultra Furry: **Normally they might nip you on occasion but they won't bite to draw blood unless they feel threatened or you invade their territory.

**Bass Bitch: **Wait. So your saying Kaminari got beaten by a bunny?

**EverSmall: **I wouldn't say beaten persay.

**Deku Dice Clay: **He bit you in the patch of skin between your thumb and index finger and you started screaming like the first girl to die in a slasher film.

**EverSmall: **His teeth went in deep.

**Deku Dice Clay: **It's like a papercut.

**EverSmall: **Paper cuts hurt.

**Bass Bitch: **That implies you read. I have never once seen you read. Not even a comic book.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Ok leave Kaminari alone. I saw it in a documentary movie once that bunnies they kill people. I think it was called Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

**EverSmall: **Seriously. That bite hurt.

**Bomberman: **You think that was painful, you should hear about Deku and the men's room attendant.

**Bass Bitch: **I don't think I heard that one.

**Acid Trip: **This has got to be good.

**Anti-Grav: **Tell the story.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Ok fine. So my dad took me with him on one of his business trips to the states the summer before UA. He took me to this place where for some reason the men's room had no urinals and all the stalls were the ones you have to pay to get into.

**Knuckles: **Those are real?

**Anti-Grav: **Making money off of people having to use the bathroom. That's a pure villain's idea.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Anyways I decided to just sneak into one of the stalls because I figured the bathroom attendant wouldn't care. I mean if I had a job that bad I wouldn't enforce the pay toilets. Unfortunately he did not like me sneaking in so he grabbed me by my belt loops, tazed me and just really beat the everloving shit out of me.

**Bass Bitch: **Please tell me you didn't….

**Deku Dice Clay: **No I didn't. Turns out that's just an urban legend. Anyways I got beaten up pretty bad in a men's room and still have the scar on the top of my head from the encounter.

**Anti-Grav: **How did your dad react to all of this?

**Deku Dice Clay: **He thought it was funny as hell. Looking back I can see how funny it was but mom didn't see the humor in it and now she wont let me travel with him alone.

**EverSmall: **And how does that make you better then me?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Cause that guy was the size of fucking Mike Tyson. You got bitten by a woodland creature about the size of a american football.

**EverSmall **has renamed the chat to **Beaten in the Men's Room**

**Deku Dice Clay **has renamed the chat to **Kaminari is a bunny's bitch**

**Deku Dice Clay **has removed naming privileges from **EverSmall**

**Deku Dice Clay: **Nobody change the chat name or Kaminari's username if he asks you to.

**Froppy: **Why am I not surprised about any of this?

**Knuckles: **I'm wondering where Kaminari gets the ideas he comes up with.

**Deus Ex Machina: **I think Mineta might have been the idea guy in that relationship.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Makes sense.

**Authors Note: Chapter 17 Answers: The obvious Julius Caesar reference, Excalibur as a penis name is from Game Grumps, Small Bump is a song by Ed Sheeran (It was one of the first things that came up when looking up the word small on Spotify) The obvious Mortal Kombat reference, and of course the Andrew Dice Clay reference.**

**Later**


	19. The Music Box

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku Dice Clay** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**EverSmall **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

8:00 pm on a Thursday

**Kaminari is a bunny's bitch**

**EverSmall: **I'm bored

**Deku Dice Clay: **Here I sent you some links for some games you can download

**_Private chat between Jiro and Midoriya_**

**Jax: **What exactly did you send him?

**That Green Gentleman: **Just a bunch of horror themed versions of old Msrio and Sonic games.

**Jax: **Was that Cthulhu version of Super Mario World in the list?

**That Green Gentleman: **That was like the top of the list

**_Kaminari is a bunny's bitch_**

11:00 pm

**EverSmall: **Well thanks Midoriya, now I won't be able to sleep tonight.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Which one did you play?

**EverSmall: **The one with the music box.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Which ending did you get?

**EverSmall: **The one with all memories of Mario being erased from existence. Why?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Ah one of the bad endings.

**EverSmall: **Wait, one of the endings. How many endings are there?

**Deku Dice Clay: **By my count, 10 and that's counting the optional Arc download.

**EverSmall: **10 endings. And there are bad endings?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Yeah. You have to admit that it looks pretty good despite using RPG Maker XP.

**EverSmall: **What's that exactly?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Are you kidding me? RPG Maker XP is a game engine used to make RPGs. It's been outdated since 2008.

**EverSmall: **Hey, I didn't know.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Thats ok and now you know. Doesn't mean I'm not gonna make fun of you for it.

**EverSmall: **Seriously though, you will have to give me a list of more games to try out.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Alright cool. I was planning on taking Eri out to the playground tomorrow you can come with and we can talk game suggestions then ok.

**EverSmall: **Ok cool. I'm in.

6:00 pm on a saturday.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Ok Kaminari is a badass.

**Froppy: **What caused this?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Ok, I took Eri to the playground and Kaminari came with so we could discuss games. I went to the restroom and when I got back I saw Eri crying and Kaminari beating the everloving shit out of some 13 year olds. And I;m talking like six of them.

**Bomberman: **Why the fuck was Pikachu beating up middle schoolers?

**Deku Dice Clay: **I later found out from Kaminari that those kids decided to try and bully Eri and he couldn't let that go on.

**Sonic: **So Kaminari was protecting a six year old from older kids who decided to pick on someone smaller and weaker than them.

**Deku Dice Clay: **That's not even the best part. Apparently they were fans of the hero Mirko, who just happened to be passing by. She basically publicly shamed the six kids and praised Kaminari in full view of a park full of strangers who were all shooting disapproving glances at them and praising Kaminari. In fact

**Deku Dice Clay **has changed **EverSmall**'s username to **Raichu**

**Raichu: **Thanks for that. I honestly think literally any of us would have done the exact same thing though. Well maybe not Mineta. Last time we went out to that amusement park he literally tried to do the "He's Not Coming"

**Anti-Grav: **What's the He's Not coming?

**Raichu: **It's when you tell a girl who is waiting for her date that "He's not coming"

**Sonic: **Is that why you guys separated from me and Tokoyami.

**Raichu: **I did not know what he was planning at the time. All I know is I told him it wasn't a good idea.

**Acid Trip: **That just seems wrong

**Deku Dice Clay: **The time he tried to convince a girl his penis grants wishes was way worse.

**Bass Bitch: **Did that even work?

**Deku Dice Clay: **How do I phrase this elegantly? Let's say you took the dumbest bar girl and she was drunk, high and had a whole frontal lobotomy leaving little to no intelligence in her brain. She would not even fall for this.

**Raichu: **Better than the time that me, Midoriya, Sero and Kirishima saw that episode of Seinfeld and had our own version of the contest.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Yeah I unfortunately remember that. Only we tried to see who could do it the most in 24 hours.

**Acid-Trip: **You guys actually tried that.

**Bass Bitch: **Is that why you had trouble walking for those few days?

**Deku Dice Clay:** We ended up in the hospital that day.

**Knuckles: **Extreme dehydration.

**Bootleg Spiderman:** And burning off almost all the skin down there.

**Discount Sue Storm: **How did they fix it?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Skin grafts. They took mine from the back of my upper thigh area.

**French Fry: **Isn't the upper thigh area your ass?

**Raichu: **I would say something but I'm in the same boat. As are Kirishima and Sero.

**Authors Note: Chapter 18 Answers: Shockingly no references in the last chapter.**

**Sometime next week I will be posting chapter 20 of this and I think I should do something special for it. I'll do a Q&A where I will answer your questions. They can be about what I do in my offtime or about my writing and thought process or even what i've been watching and doing lately. There will be some ground rules however.**

**I will not give out my any information I don't want revealed (Names, location, gamertags, ETC)**

**No politics and religion**

**No racist, sexist, bigoted and xenophobic questions**

**If you have a question either leave it in the reviews or PM it to me.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	20. Deku's Support GroupQ&A

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku Dice Clay** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Raichu **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

5:00 pm on a Sunday

**Kaminari is a bunny's bitch**

**Deku Dice Clay **has renamed the groupchat to **EAT ASS, SUCK A DICK, SELL DRUGS**

**Sonic: **Midoriya that is highly inappropriate. Do you have anything to say for yourself.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Why yes Lida. I do have something to say.

**Anti-Grav: **I don't see a problem with it.

**Bomberman: **It's just something he says when he's been drinking. Oh God. That means.

**Acid Trip: **He's done with AA

**Deku Dice Clay:** _Whenever life gets you down. Keeps you wearing a frown. And the gravy train has left you behind._

**Raichu: **Is he really doing this?

**Knuckles: **My body is ready. Come at me, I'm a brave boy.

**Deku Dice Clay: **_And when you're all out of hope. Down at the end of your rope. And nobody's there to throw you a line_

**Thermostat: **What's going on

**Tsukuyomi: **What a mad bouquet of darkness.

**Deku Dice Clay: **_If you ever get so low that you don't know which way to go. Come on and take a walk in my shoes. Never worry 'bout a thing, got the world on a string. 'Cause I've got the cure for all of my blues_

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Come on just say the words

**Purple Haze: **I am with him and Jiro right now and I can confirm he is singing this while he's typing it.

**Deku Dice Clay: **_I take a look at my enormous penis. And my troubles start a-meltin' away. I take a look at my enormous penis. And the happy times are coming to stay. I gotta sing and I dance when I glance in my pants. And the feeling's like a sunshiney day. I take a look at my enormous pe-e-e-nis. And everything is goin' my way._

**Knuckles: **Ok. I'mnot that brave.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Just an FYI I'm completely sober right now.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Then Why?

**Deku Dice Clay: **You all should know me by now Momo. Once I get the urge to sing, I just got to sing. Also I DO have an enormous penis. I also wanted to brag.

**Deus Ex Machina:** ...I'm just gonna go jump off the roof right now.

**Sonic: **Yaoyorozo. NO. If you die then it's just me here to keep them from destroying the place.

**Anti-Grav: **Again. I give it an 8.5 out of 10.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Thank yo Uraraka. That's why we're friends.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Anyone remember when Midoriya was just a shy little cinnamon roll.

**Froppy: **Now he's a pure Sinnamon Roll.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Thank you.

**Raichu: **There's also the fact he likes trans girls.

**Deku Dice Clay: **KAMINARI YOU BITCH! I TOLD YOU THAT IN CONFIDENCE.

**Bomberman: **So wait that means that…

**Tentacle Hentai: **Midoriya…

**Ultra Furry: **Is…

**Sugar Daddy: **Pansexual…

**Deku Dice Clay: **Alright fine, It's true. I just never thought gender was an important factor when dating. So yes. I'm pansexual.

**French Fry: **All I can say is. CONGRATULATIONS ON COMING OUT MIDORIYA.

**Sonic: **I agree with Aoyama's statement. Congratulations my friend and thanks for trusting us enough to eventually tell us what we already know.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Wait. You all already knew. Why didn't you tell me? This has been weighing on me for a long time now.

**Anti-Grav: **It was something you did while drunk. You would hit on all of us except for Mineta. You would tell us and I quote, "I don't care what you've got, let's just make out a bit."

**Bass Bitch: **It's true we just waited for you to say something while sober but you never did.

**Deku Dice Clay: **So wait. You knew also. And you don't have any problem with it?

**Bass Bitch: **If I had any problems with it would I still be with you.

**Deus Ex Machina: **It's true. She even told me that watching you struggle with keeping it hidden was painful to watch.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Well thanks everybody, and sorry I made you all feel uncomfortable.

**Anti-Grav: **You didn't make us feel uncomfortable. At least not as much as Mineta did.

**Bomberman: **Relax Deku. I knew they would be cool with it if you just came out. Their probably more upset that you thought you needed to hide it from everyone.

**Knuckles: **Wait BakuBro. You knew the whole time? Why didn't you say anything?

**Bomberman: **I grew up with him what do you expect. It also wasn't my place to say anything.

**Thermostat: **Midoriya. I respect that you were able to trust us all. But I must warn you all not to let this out to the public. If this gets out then there will be some who will condemn Midoriya for his "Lifestyle choice" as they like to say it is.

**Raichu: **What do you mean Todoroki?

**Bomberman: **What he means is a percentage of the population will demonize Deku cause he's not straight. He's not gay either but they will say he is unable to be a hero because of it. They also think it's a choice and it can be changed with a little treatment and religion. Man-made, rewiring of a pre-disposition, playing God.

**Purple Haze: **It's true. The president of the United States banned Transgenders from military service with a tweet.

**Deku Dice Clay: **I have my own theory on that one. It happened because of a pussy-grabing gone wrong.

**Raichu: **Sorry for outing you Midoriya

**Deku Dice Clay: **It's ok Kaminari. It probably would have gotten out someway.

**Raichu: **But Still. In fact.

**Raichu** has renamed the groupchat to **Deku Support Group**

**Deku Dice Clay **has renamed the groupchat to **EAT ASS, SUCK A DICK, SELL DRUGS**

**Deku Dice Clay: **It's not necessary. Besides, I like this name better.

**Q&A TIME**

**The Keeper of Worlds asked: How far are you in MHA manga and what's the best scene or arc you're looking forward to in the coming anime seasons?**

**I'm at the point in the manga where they just announced the hero rankings and Endeavor is fighting High End. The arc I'm looking forward to is the Overhaul arc cause I want to see if their going to make it as dark as in the manga.**

** asked: will you be using other characters more? I don't think I see Uraraka amd Momo in the group chat a lot. I would love to see you utilize the entirety of the class and not just IzukuBakusquad.**

**I am trying to use all the characters involved in Class 1-A. I have too think about what jokes work and which characters they work with. I'm also trying to get some of the 1-B students involved along with more teachers and pro heros and possibly the League of villians.**

**fanman (Guest) asked: why is there an entire chapter that is straight up just song lyrics from actual songs**

**First of all there are three chapters of it and I like to reference random rock songs and I figured if I had them in a band performing them readers would listen to the songs later.**

**question asker (Guest) asked: what motivated you to make three entire chapters that are nothing but song lyrics thrown in a row and why isnt this fanfic taken down already for being a weak chat fanfic that breaks the rules**

**For the first answer look at the answer to fanman's question. Second, it's because I also use the Rock Show chapters and the chapter where they played Cards Against Humanity as a plot device so it technically does follow the rules. Also If you don't like it, don't read it. I'm not forcing you to read it.**

**Over On AO3**

**William Sloan asked: Are you a Pokemon fan? I think I just came to the haunting realization that most My Hero fans are also Pokemon fans, but I'm not entirely sure.**

**I'm not a Pokemon fan. I actually didn't get into any anime or manga until I was in my late teens (17-19) I watched one episode of DBZ when Cell absorbed Android 18 when I was four and that kept me away from anime for years. Most of the Pokemon facts I got were from Smash Bros and the internet.**

**Stephano1294 asked: What are you top 5 Mha ships? Who is your least favourite character in Mha and why? What is your favourite moment in Mha?**

**I'm gonna rapid fire the first part**

**IzuAsui**

**IzuJiro**

**IzuMina**

**IzuPony**

**IzuMomo**

**My least favorite character is Mineta. He's only useful twice. Once in the USJ and once in the movie, of course they had to bribe him with the empty promise of a harem. My favorite moment was the final battle between All Might and All For One. It's just so epic.**

**Thanks for the questions. I hope you all enjoyed sending them, I enjoyed answering them. If this is something you want to see again feel free to send more questions and I'll answer them. I might even make this it's own thing instead of at the end of a chapter if I get enough questions. Also thanks for supporting this up to 20 chapters. I honestly didn't think this would do good enough to make it that far (I didn't think I'd make it to 10) I really apreciate it.**

**Authors Note: Chapter 19 Answers: The games mentioned are real and free to download. The whole thing about Kaminari and Eri was suggested by the reader The Keeper of Worlds on . He suggested I gave Kaminari a win that involved protecting Eri. The thing about Mineta doing the He's Not Coming is a reference to both How I Met Your Mother and the MHA School Briefs light novels. Their version of the contest is from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, along with the line about their skin being burnt off. The skin graft location is one of the parts of the body where they actually take skin from when you need a skin graft. **

**As Always**

**Later**


	21. Kaminari Memes and Cosplay

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku Dice Clay** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Raichu **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

6:00 pm on a Monday

**EAT ASS, SUCK A DICK, SELL DRUGS**

**Acid Trip: **Ok, I need some help.

**Anti-Grav: **What do you need help with?

**Acid Trip: **I got a picture of Kaminari right after he overuses his quirk and I need the perfect caption to make it into a meme.

**Anti-Grav: **Oh, ok. How about...When THe Weed Hits Just Right.

**Acid Trip: **Good so far.

**Bass Bitch: **When Netflix Brings Back Your Favorite Series.

**Acid Trip: **Awesome.

**Raichu: **When Your Girl Finally Lets You Get To Third Base.

**Acid Trip: **You to Kaminari?

**Raichu: **You just have to laugh at yourself once in a while.

**Acid Trip: **True.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Swiggity Swooty, I'm Coming For That Booty.

**Acid Trip: **Ok that wins my contest.

**Deku Dice Clay: **What contest?

**Deus Ex Machina: **I think he might have been talking to Jiro.

**Bass Bitch: **Why couldn't you send that in a private message?

**Deku Dice Clay: **And miss out on you getting all flustered. No way.

**Tails: **At least he's not getting all rapey like Mineta was.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Are you wanting Midoriya to hit on you like that.

**Deku Dice Clay: **I'll do it to.

**Tails: **Why? Just, Why?

**Bomberman: **This is just getting weird.

**Purple Haze: **Agreed.

**Knuckles: **Did they just…

**Raichu: **Agree on something?

**Froppy: **Nobody smells toast right now, right?

**Sonic: **I highly doubt we're all having a stroke.

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Don't be so sure. I'm currently watching Midoriya do his Godfather impression right now. BTW Koda, Midoriya is using your bunny for this.

**Ultra Furry: **So that's where she is.

**Deku Dice Clay: **You'll get her back unharmed. Besides, she was already in the room and I brought the swiveling chair from my room.

**Ultra Furry: **She likes when you scratch behind the ears.

**Bootleg Spiderman: **But why are you in a pimp suit?

**Deku Dice Clay: **How is this a pimp suit?

**Raichu: **It's not a pimp suit. It's just a regular suit with a duster instead of a blazer.

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Duster?

**Sonic: **A trench coat that goes down to the feet.

**Tentacle Hentai: **Why are you dressed like that anyways?

**Deku Dice Clay: **I just got back from a cosplay event.

**Knuckles: **Who were you going as?

**Deku Dice Clay: **I went as Spike Spiegel from Cowboy Bebop.

**Acid Trip: **I thought he just wore a blazer with the sleeves rolled up.

**Anti-Grav: **When he needs to get serious he wears a duster so he can carry more weapons.

**Bass Bitch: **Literally every time he goes to some costume event he choses something that he has to put in the least effort. Got a blue suit and a brown duster. Dresses as Spike Spiegel.

**Acid Trip: **But his eyes are the wrong color.

**Deku Dice Clay: **BTW thanks for the brown contacts Momo.

**Deus Ex Machina: **No problem.

**Anti-Grav: **Did you go alone?

**Deku Dice Clay: **No. Kachan went as Jet Black and Kyo went as Faye.

**Acid Trip: **I NEED PICTURES.

**Bass Bitch: **No.

**Bomberman: **No.

**Deku Dice Clay: **I'll show you later.

**Authors Note: Chapter 20 answers: The song he sang was Enormous Penis by Da Vinci's Notebook. Kirishima's reaction is from JonTron. Deku's statement about being inspired to sing is from Final Fantasy VII Machinabridged by teamfourstar (Deku's VA also played Teen Gohan in the Android 13 movie) Bakugo's quote "Man-made, rewiring of a pre-disposition, playing God." is from the Macklemore song Same Love. Izuku's theory on why transgenders were banned from the military is a Jim Jefferies joke.**

**BTW I have a poll going on for a potential universe for Into the Dekuverse on my profile. Vote on what you want to see in a potential universe. I'm also planning something new so look out for that (It will be rated Mature for violence)**

**As Always**

**Later**


	22. Anime Dubs

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku Dice Clay** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Lida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Raichu **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

5:00pm on a Wednesday

**EAT ASS, SUCK A DICK, SELL DRUGS**

**Raichu:** Anyone notice that All Might's voice sounds like the english dub version of Piccolo from Dragon Ball Z?

**Bomberman: **The fuck are you on about now?

**Raichu: **It seems a lot of us sounds like characters from Anime English dubs. Like you sound like Hide from Tokyo Ghoul.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Holly shit, your right!

**Bomberman: **You know Deku sounds like the guy teamfourstar has playing Cloud and Teen-Gohan in their Final Fantasy VII Machinabridged and Dragon Ball Z Abridged.

**Anti-Grav: **I can hear it in my head now.

**Froppy: **You know Ochako, you kinda sound like Nami from One Piece.

**Anti-Grav: **And you sound like Stocking from Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt.

**Deus Ex Machina: **You shouldn't throw stones if you live in glass houses Asui.

**Froppy: **Shut it Scarlet!

**Deus Ex Machina: **I don't get it.

**Bass Bitch: **She means you sound like Erza from Fairy Tale.

**Raichu: **And you sound like Lan Fan from Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood.

**Acid Trip: **Speaking of which, anyone notice that when Lida's angry he sounds like Scar from Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood and like Lawrence from Spice and Wolf when he's not angry?

**Sonic: **And you sound like Petra from Attack on Titan.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Who do I sound like?

**Tsukuyomi: **Emi Yusa from The Devil Is A Part-Timer.

**Discount Sue Storm: **And you sound like Satan from the same series.

**Purple Haze: **You know Kaminari sounds like Genshiro Saji from High School DxD.

**Knuckles: **And you sound like Yang from Gangsta.

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Nice one Dende.

**Knuckles: **?

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Dragon Ball Z.

**Thermostat: **I'm so confused.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Oh, right, Wave here doesn't watch anime.

**Thermostat: **Wave?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Akame ga Kill.

**Authors Note: Chapter 21 answers: Kind of gave away all the answers in the last chapter. This one got way to meta. I have a poll for ItD on my profile, vote on it (Jackass is currently winning).**

**As Always**

**Later**


	23. Stick Shifts and Shark Penises

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku Dice Clay** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Raichu **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

5:00 pm on a Friday

**EAT ASS, SUCK A DICK, SELL DRUGS**

**Raichu: **Hey Midoriya, can I borrow your van?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Why?

**Raichu: **I need to move some stuff for my parents, you know furniture and shit.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Oh, well in that case...No.

**Raichu: **Why?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Cause I know for a fact you don't have a driver's license.

**Raichu: **But you let Jiro drive it.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Cause she has a license. Also she wanted to learn to drive stick.

**Raichu: **I thought you called it the Rape Van?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Stick shift, you know, manual transmission.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Can you drive a stick?

**Raichu: **Well, no.

**Deku Dice Clay: **And there's my point. I'll drive you there but I'm not letting you drive a stick. You have enough things that will distract you.

**Raichu: **Well, thanks for agreeing to drive me there.

**Deku Dice Clay: **No problem.

8:00 pm

**Acid Trip: **Ok since when can Midori drive stick?

**Bomberman: **That would be his dad's doing.

**Anti-Grav: **His dad?

**Bomberman: **Yeah, he would not let Deku learn to drive or take his road test in an automatic. Said it was to make sure he really learned to drive.

**Knuckles: **Is any of that true?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Every word. Dad says manuals are easier to repair and if you can drive one, you can pretty much drive anything.

**Deus Ex Machina: **But isn't driving stick like really hard?

**Deku Dice Clay: **At first it can be, all you need to do is find the sweet spot. Each car is different.

**Bass Bitch: **True, bit of advice, don't try to learn in a van, learn in a smaller car.

**Bomberman: **Didn't you have to learn in your dad's compensator?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Most horrifying experience in my life.

**Bass Bitch: **Why?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Cause he parked it on an incline and said to get it moving forward or you aren't learning to drive.

**Thermostat: **Compensator?

**Bomberman: **One of those huge pickups people drive if they use it for their job or are trying to compensate for something.

**Thermostat: **What are they trying to compensate for?

**Purple Haze: **Most of the time, small penises.

**Purple Haze: **While I'm on the subject, is it penises or penie? I don't ever use the plural and they never mention the plural on shark week.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Shark week?

**Purple Haze: **Yeah, on shark week they say that in some species of sharks the male has two penises.

**Knuckles: **That explains why there so confident.

**Deku Dice Clay: **And so angry.

**Purple Haze: **?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Two penises, no hands. They must be like "AHHHH! I'LL TRADE YOU A PENIS FOR A HAND!"

**Deku Dice Clay: **If I had a nickel for every time I've said or heard that.

**Acid Trip: **Ok Kaminari and Kirishima are now on the floor laughing.

**Sonic: **Midoriya that is not appropriate for a class setting.

**Deku Dice Clay: **But we're not in class, we're in our rooms right now.

**Bass Bitch: **And I'm with him right now. Although he actually did the shark thing while saying it, even held his hands behind his back.

**Anti-Grav: **Now that's dedication.

**Deus Ex Machina: **So Shoto has your father tried to make any effort with you to mend things over?

**Thermostat: **No, not yet.

**Deus Ex Machina: **It'll happen.

**Deku Dice Clay: **My dad once tried to make up for not being there for much of my childhood. He left a case of Guinness in the back of my van.

**Anti-Grav: **How did you know it was him?

**Deku Dice Clay: **He was passed out in the back with half the beers drank.

**Acid Trip: **Your dads awesome.

**Bomberman: **Better than your uncle, I think he's on drugs.

**Sonic: **Bakugo, that is very inappropriate to say that about someone's family.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Oh, he is on drugs. When I was trying to think of things to say to Kyoka on our first date I asked him for some good lines and he gave me a straw.

**Deku Dice Clay: **But still, who thought smoking weed while watching movies was a good couples activity.

**Bass Bitch: **That reminds me what's the plans for the next movie night?

**Deku Dice Clay: **I was thinking Half Baked while smoking some Moondrops.

**Discount Sue Storm: #RelationshipGoals**

**Authors Note: Gave away the answers in the last one. I'm going to put up another poll for ItD so find that on my profile.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	24. Disney and Piercings

Class usernames (as of now)

**Deku Dice Clay** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Acid Trip** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Raichu **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

12:00 pm on a Saturday

**EAT ASS, SUCK A DICK, SELL DRUGS**

**Anti-Grav: **Anyone see Deku and Jiro today?

**Deus Ex Machina: **I think their spending the day with Eri.

**Acid Trip: **That's where they are? I thought he was on a bender and she was trying to stop her or something?

**Bomberman: **It's noon.

**Purple Haze: **And he's with a small child.

**Sonic: **What kind of degenerate do you take him for?

**Discount Sue Storm: **Obviously the kind who gets drunk in front of children at noon.

**Acid Trip: **Hey, I'm sorry.

**Sonic: **Not the ones you should be apologizing to Ashido.

**Anti-Grav: **You should apologize to **Deku Dice Clay **and **Bass Bitch **when they get back.

**Acid Trip: **Ok, got it.

5:00 pm on a Saturday

**Deku Dice Clay: **So when did Disney movies get so predictable?

**Thermostat: **What do you mean?

**Deku Dice Clay:** They all follow the same formula, parents die in tragic incident, kid becomes hero, learns of the value of friendship and family, everyones happy in the end.

**Raichu: **Don't worry, Eri will get out of the Disney phase eventually, I think.

**Knuckles: **BTW what did you and Jiro do with Eri today?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Nothing much, took her to a playground near here, got some Disney movies for her to watch when she's here, and well…

**Bass Bitch: **This idiot managed to get his ear pierced.

**Anti-Grav: **Wait, What?

**Bass Bitch: **Eri wanted to get her ears pierced, but we decided she needed to know how to take care of a piercing before she got one, and since mine were already done, well, you can guess the rest.

**Froppy: **Ok, I've been meaning to get mine done so I need to know how it felt?

**Deku Dice Clay: **It only hurt for like a second, it felt weird having the needle in my ear while the piercist was getting the earring ready.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Did they use a gun or something?

**Bass Bitch: **No, they just used a thick needle and did it by hand. They said it hurts way less to do it that way then with the gun.

**Knuckles: **Did they give you any instructions on how to clean it?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Just use antibacterial soap and warm water on it three times a day.

**Discount Sue Storm: **What does the ring look like.

**Bass Bitch: **They gave him a U shaped ring with pointed tips on the ends. It looks really cool.

**Deku Dice Clay: **Very punk looking.

**Acid Trip: **NOICE!

**Deku Dice Clay **has changed **Acid Trip**'s username to **Ninja Mina**

**Ninja Mina: **SOMEONE FINALLY GETS MY REFERENCES!

**Sonic: **Wait, what reference?

**Raichu: **Are you fucking shitting all over both of my nuts?

**Deku Dice Clay **has changed **Raichu**'s username to **Denki Sexbang**

**Sonic: **Midoriya this is highly inappropriate, what have you to say for yourself?

**Deku Dice Clay: **Come at me scrublord, I'm ripped!

**Denki Sexbang **has changed **Deku Dice Clay**'s username to **RuberDeku**

**Bomberman: **What do you expect at this point?

**Sonic: **For everyone to keep it PG

**RuberDeku: **Don't count your chickens before they egg.

**Authors Note: Chapter 23 answers: Izuku's experiences learning stick are from when I first tried to learn to drive a stick. The thing about shark penises and the plural of the word penis is from a Craig Ferguson routine (I'm Here To Help) along with the shark impresion, Izuku's dad's way of making an effort is from That 70's Show. I have a poll going on my profile for ItD, vote on it.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	25. Trolling and 70's Porn

Class usernames (as of now)

**RubberDeku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Denki Sexbang **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

7:00 am on a Sunday

**EAT ASS, SUCK A DICK, SELL DRUGS**

**Knuckles: **Anyone hear a banging sound last night?

**French Fry: **It was like right next to my room, so yes.

**Tsukuyomi: **It was also next to my room.

**Purple Haze: **Sounds like a certain couple had fun last night.

**Deus Ex Machina: **No, they didn't.

**Denki Sexbang: **How do you know?

**Deus Ex Machina: **Cause Jiro said last night she was staying with her parents.

**Ninja Mina: **A likely story.

**RubberDeku: **It's true, she was.

**Tsukuyomi: **Then what was that crashing sound?

**RubberDeku: **If you must know, I was smoking some awesome weed.

**Anti-Grav: **Ok nothing strange yet.

**RuberDeku: **However, one thing my dad didn't write down in the note he left in the box that it was palliative care pot.

**Ultra Furry: **Palliative care pot?

**RubberDeku: **Medical weed prescribed when the doctor knows your going to die and there is nothing that can be done but ease their suffering. Anyways this stuff got me so ridonculously high that as soon as a Hardes commercial came on, I sort of charged my TV and now it's broken.

**Denki Sexbang: **So you got high and ran into your TV cause a fast food commercial came on.

**Ninja Mina: **Why am I not surprised?

**Thermostat:** Happens to the best of us.

**Bomberman: **Getting ridonculously high or charging your TV?

**Thermostat: **Yes.

5:00 pm on a Sunday

**Bass Bitch: **Ok I need to know. Why is there a giant box with a combination lock in my boyfriends room?

**Denki Sexbang: **Something his dad sent him.

**Ninja Mina: **Apparently it's full of really strong weed.

**RubberDeku: **Among other things.

**Anti-Grav: **What does that mean exactly?

**RubberDeku: **He said in the note that the box was full of happiness. All that was in there was pot, booze and porn.

**Denki Sexbang: **Get rid of the pot and booze and you'll have Mineta's idea of happiness.

**Bass Bitch: **BTW Izuku, it might be time to send Mineta another message.

**RubberDeku: **Alright let me shave real quick then I'll get the burner phone.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Wait. What?

**Ninja Mina: **I'm kinda curious now.

**Bass Bitch: **We have been trolling Mineta by having Izuku send flirty messages and fake nudes to him and posting his responses on reddit.

**Deus Ex Machina: **What do you mean by fake nudes?

**Bass Bitch: **You know, stuff like sending pictures of his elbow taken to look like an ass, the hand vag. Stuff like that.

**RubberDeku: **Ok I'm finished shaving around my nipple so we can take an up close picture of that and send it to him.

**Bass Bitch: **And we're all ready for the ultimate reveal.

**Tentacle Hentai: **Ultimate reveal?

**RubberDeku: **The fake nudes but where you can see me pulling off the fake nudes. You know flexing my arm together, me and Kaminari doing the hand vag and a picture of me shirtless pointing to the shaved nipple.

**Ninja Mina: **You two are pure evil. I love it.

7:00 pm on a Sunday

**RubberDeku: **Ok I have a literal goldmine here.

**Deus Ex Machina: **What do you mean by goldmine?

**RubberDeku: **The porn in the box is shockingly worth a lot of money. Like enough to buy a new gaming pc, a lot.

**Bass Bitch: **HOW?

**RuberDeku: **Original prints from the 70's, rare stuff and the facts perverts will pay anything for porn. On ebay I already sold about $300 American to a grapeboi69. No prizes for guessing who that is.

**Froppy: **It's Mineta.

**RubberDeku: **I said NO PRIZES.

**Bomberman: **How much was in that box exactly?

**RuberDeku: **I've only sold about a sixth of it.

**Anti-Grav: **lets see, six times 300. That's about $1800 in porn

**Ninja Mina: **That's a lot of porn.

**RubberDeku: **Ok that's enough for now. I think after all that I'm gonna have to take a bottle of what I think is Old Grandad with me while I shower. I hope whatever I did in the past life was fun, because I definitely pissed someone off back then to deserve this.

**Boomberman: **Goddammit Deku.

**Authors Note: Chapter 24 answers: Pretty much every classic Disney movie before the nineties (And some during and after) followed that formula. Ninja Mina, Denki Sexbang and RuberDeku are references to Ninja Sex Party and Game Grumps (Ninja Brian, Danny Sexbang and RubberNinja (Ross O' Donovan)), they also use the quotes of their namesakes. (I'm low-key wanting a tv tropes page for this) I have a poll for ItD, vote on it.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	26. THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL

Class usernames (as of now)

**RubberDeku** \- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Denki Sexbang **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

8:00 pm on a Tuesday

**EAT ASS, SUCK A DICK, SELL DRUGS**

**RubberDeku: **Fucking Rockstar.

**Purple Haze: **Problem?

**RubberDeku: **Rockstar made a launcher for their games on PC and it keeps freezing GTA V after 20 minutes.

**Bomberman: **But didn't you buy the physical copy?

**RubberDeku: **I did but it still launches with the new launcher and the game keeps freezing at the worst times.

**Denki Sexbang: **So what are you going to do?

**RubberDeku: **I tried contacting Rockstar support but they tried telling me it was a problem with my graphics card, even though I just replaced it. (Thanks Dad)

**Knuckles: **Do you have problems with any other games?

**RubberDeku: **No, just GTA V.

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Just wait till the next update and that might fix it. If not then just stop playing it altogether and stop buying their games.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Don't forget to talk about it on social media. Get the word out.

**Ninja Mina: **SHOUT IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS!

**Discount Sue Storm: **Get one of those planes with the banner.

**Anti-Grav: **Tattoo it on your ass.

**RubberDeku: **Wait, what was that last one?

**Anti-Grav: **John Oliver said it on his show about how the Trump presidency was not normal.

**Denki Sexbang: **THE GLOVES ARE OFF! THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL ARE ON!

**Froppy **has renamed the group chat to **THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**RubberDeku: **Remind me to get ** Sugar Daddy **to bake a cake for my new favorite holiday: Tsuyu Appreciation Day.

**Froppy: **I'm flattered.

**RubberDeku: **TSUYU IS MY NEW GOD!

**Bomberman: **I thought you were in that cult your dad started?

**RubberDeku: **He only started it to get out of doing jury duty. I only agreed to it because he gave me the position of Mega Pope. He's the Grand Dragon.

**Bomberman: **Is that why they had him serve 30 days in jail instead of community service for the Chuck E Cheese incident?

**Bass Bitch: **What incident?

**Bomberman: **Yeah for Deku's fourth birthday his dad took us to Chuck E Cheese and the singing mouse pissed him off so he put some skee balls in a tube sock and brained him.

**RubberDeku: **We're not allowed in Chuck E Cheese any more.

**Knuckles: **Your dad's awesome.

**Denki Sexbang: **Can I join your church, Mega Pope Midoriya?

**RubberDeku: **The Pillsbury Doughboy accepts your request.

**Ninja Mina: **The Pillsbury Doughboy?

**RubberDeku: **That just happened to be the first thing that came to his mind when he got the idea to form a cult at jury duty.

**Ninja Mina: **I'm in.

**RubberDeku: **MORE SOULS FOR THE DOUGHBOY!

**Sonic: **Everyone calm the fuck down.

**Anti-Grav: **IIDA SWORE! DEKU YOU OWE ME A HUNDRED NOW!

**RubberDeku: **Couldn't wait till Christmas, could you Iida?

**Sonic: **You two bet on when I'd swear?

**Anti-Grav: **About a month ago. Deku had around Christmas time and I had early October.

**RubberDeku: **Great, now what am I gonna do with the sheet music for Easy-E's Christmas song?

**Tails: **Did you say Easy E had a christmas song?

**French Fry: **Obviously our resident Pon D'amour is pulling our legs

**RubberDeku:** I'm not it's called Merry Mothafuckin' X-mas. Also Pon D'amour?

**Deus Ex Machina: **It translates to candy apple, it's a nickname you give to sweetest among all. Doesn't really fit you though, I'd go with Asticot, ment for a crazy guy.

**Ninja Mina: **How did we go from gaming to Tsuyu Appreciation to cults to offensive X-mas songs to French nicknames?

**RubberDeku: **I don't know.

**Denki Sexbang: **All that's going through my mind right now is that time Midoriya decided to do that acoustic version of Baby Got Back while he was on painkillers last week.

**Anti-Grav: **I didn't know whether to be offended or impressed by that.

**Discount Sue Storm: **I was a little bit of both. I was offended by how impressed I was.

**Deus Ex Machina: **He did make that song more bearable to listen to.

**Bass Bitch: **Also less objectifying.

**Froppy: **It was pretty funny hearing him refer to himself as Izzy M during the song.

**Bass Bitch **has changed **RubberDeku**'s username to **Izzy M**

**Purple Haze: **Gentleman, you know what to do!

**Bootleg Spiderman: **I want 'em real thick and juicy

**Knuckles: **So find that juicy double

**Izzy M: **Izzy M's in trouble

**Denki Sexbang: **Beggin' for a piece of that bubble

**Tentacle Hentai: **I'm not sure if they planned that…

**Ultra Furry: **Or it just happened randomly.

**Sugar Daddy: **You all scare me.

**Tsukuyomi: **Revelry In The Dark.

**Authors Note: Chapter 25 answers: the thing about Palliative Care Pot was from Jay Mohr, Happiness being drugs and pornno was from Sonic For Hire (I replaced crack with pot), him charging his TV was from The Office (US version), Trolling with fake nudes is from Workaholics. If you want to know what an acoustic version of Baby Got Back sounds like look up Jonathan Coultan's version. Also Easy-E actually wrote a Christmas song called Merry Mothafuckin' X-mas, it's on spotify and youtube. Don't forget to vote on my poll and also check out The Deku with The Mouth (it blew up more than I expected it to).**

**As Always**

**Later.**


	27. Date R Drugs, Gay Porn, and Memories

Class usernames (as of now)

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Denki Sexbang **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**A little warning: this chapter may get into M rated territory: There will be jokes about date rape, porn, masterbation, various termanology of gay sex (thanks Historical Roasts), drugs, child abuse, and depresion. You have been warned.**

8:00 pm on a Saturday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Bass Bitch: Izzy M** why did I find date rape drugs in under your matress?

**Ninja Mina: **This ought to be good.

**Izzy M: **I use them when I see something I don't want to remember.

**Anti-Grav: **What do you mean something you don't want to remember?

**Izzy M: **Stuff like crime scene photos from Muscular and Moonfish's murders and catching Mineta jerking off. That poor melon.

**Bass Bitch: **I can see anyone taking pills to forget that. BTW have you heard anything about Mineta lately?

**Izzy M: **According to the guy who sells me weed, a grape headed midget has been buying poppers by the box full.

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Ok I've seen every episode of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia but I still don't quite know what poppers are.

**Discount Sue Storm: **We may never know.

**Knuckles: **I just looked it up on Urban Dictionary.

**Ninja Mina: **Well, we're waiting.

**Knuckles: **It refers to a small, usually brown bottle of solvents or the solvents themselves, which are sniffed, usually during homosexual sex by the bottom. Amyl Nitrate boosts blood pressure, relaxing the anus and making anal sex more comoftable. Also known as snappers.

**Denki Sexbang: **WHY WOULD HE BUY THOSE?

**Izzy M: **And like that I'm going to need a forget me pill.

**Bass Bitch: **Oh God. What happened?

**Izzy M: **One of my friends just texted me. He does freelance editing work and aparently Mineta hired him to edit some videos and well, Mineta now does gay porn. And apparently...he's a bottom.

**Bass Bitch: **I'm gonna need one of those pills also.

**Bomberman: **Please tell me you have enough for all of us?

**Izzy M: **I do. Anyone wants one I'm selling them. $5 a pill, it's a bargain so you can erase all memory of that knowledge.

**Deus Ex Machina: **In that case I'll gladly pay for everyone's pill.

**Izzy M: **Pleasure doing business with you today.

**Izzy M **has deleted all messages from the past 2 hours

12:00 pm on a Sunday

**Denki Sexbang: **So why don't I remember anything from last night?

**Izzy M: **I don't know but I don't remember anything either and all the chat logs from last night were deleted so I'd say we're probably better off not knowing.

**Bass Bitch: **I'm just gonna change the subject here. Has anyone seen any good movies recently?

**Knuckles: **I saw Joker a few days ago.

**Izzy M: **How was it?

**Knuckles: **It was amazing. Joaquin Phoenix did an amazing job, and that ending, I could tell you how it ends but that would not do it justice. You have to see the whole movie to truly know how it ends.

**Izzy M: **I might just wait for the Blu-Ray. Ever since the overhaul raid I can't go into any crowded place without people getting suspicious of me.

**Bass Bitch: **I get the same looks and I wasn't even involved in it.

**Denki Sexbang: **I just saw Spiderman Far From Home. Jake Gyllenhaal was amazing in it. For the first half of the movie you sympathize with him then it's revealed the whole time he was the real villain. Just amazing.

**Bass Bitch: **Your man-crush is showing. Also he was pretty convincing.

**Knuckles: **I just rewatched Nightcrawler.

**Izzy M: **Which one was that?

**Knuckles: **The one where the crime scene photographer starts recording the aftermath of violent crimes to sell to a reporter for lots of money.

**Purple Haze: **Donie Darko was pretty good.

**Izzy M: **No thanks, reminds me too much of my childhood. Lousy traumatic childhood.

**Sonic: **Is there something we need to know about Midoriya?

**Izzy M: **Just that most of my childhood was not that great where my uncle was concerned.

**Bass Bitch: **It's true. I only met the man once for like five minutes and in that time he shook Izzy down for money, yelled at him to "Be a man" when he complained about having to pay him, and hit on me in front of Izzy and his parents.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Jesus Christ.

**Thermostat: **And I thought I had a rough childhood.

**Bomberman: **Rough was an understatement. Deku's uncle pretty much used every type of abuse on him except sexual, however he came close once.

**Knuckles: **Wait, what?

**Bomberman: **Yeah, during Aunt Inko's birthday a couple years ago that asshole was talking about how Deku would be more subservient if Aunt Inko and Uncle Hisashi would beat him. He then looked at me and Deku and said he would have to come up with a new form of punishment while he was grabbing his crotch. I never saw a man go down that fast after getting punched.

**Denki Sexbang: **Well, I want to kill him now.

**Bomberman: **Uncle Hisashi legit nearly tried. I remember that prolapsed asshole threatened to press charges against Uncle Hisashi and Aunt Inko but my parents pointed out that any judge would immediately have him locked up for child abuse. They also recorded the whole thing.

**Izzy M: **I still watch that video when I'm trying to fall asleep at night.

**Bomberman: **At this point Deku's parents decided to have me and him learn to fight. Deku's dad trained us to fight like MMA fighters. Something about not wanting us alone with that man without a way to fight back if needed.

**Anti-Grav: **Ok Deku, how are you so normal?

**Izzy M: **Who says I'm normal?

**_Private chat between Jiro and Momo_**

**Momo: **He is ok, right?

**Jiro: **Some nights are worse than others.

**Momo: **Explain.

**Jiro: **Some night he will wake up and just start crying. It's not as terrifying as the sleepwalking though.

**Momo: **Sleepwalking?

**Jiro: **Some nights he will just get up, grab a black sharpie and just draw X's on all the doors.

**Momo: **Is that why once a week there is a black X on my door?

**Jiro: **Yeah, Seeing that and knowing I can't help him really hurts sometimes.

**Momo: **Just do small things to help him and don't outright ask him if he needs help. If he asks for help, then help him.

**Jiro: **Thanks Momo. Your way cheaper than any therapist.

**Authors Note: I apologize for how dark this got. Normally I will put in several pop culture references but I've been thinking about my life up till this point so...a lot of the dark stuff comes from my own life. Anyways Chapter 26 answers: The stuff about Rockstar is from my own frustrations with the game (Now I know why they were giving San Andreas for free), of course the John Oliver references, worshiping the Pillsbury Doughboy is from GameSocietyPimps' Morgan Freeman Far Cry 5 video, and of course the Jonathan Coultan references. I promise the next one will be more lighthearted and fun.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	28. Sleepwalking and Middle School Memories

Class usernames (as of now)

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Denki Sexbang **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

8:00 pm on a Friday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Anti-Grav: **So, how bad was everyone's schools before UA?

**Tails: **Not bad just boring.

**Denki Sexbang: **They would send me to the zoo during all standardized tests.

**Bomberman: **Now you've opened the floodgates.

**Ninja Mina: **This can't be good.

**Bass Bitch: **Oh God. It's happening.

**Izzy M: **It's all coming back to me. Oh my God! I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs! I watched a prostitute stab a clown! Our basketball hoop was a rib cage – a rib cage! Why did you bring me here? I blocked all this stuff out for a reason! Oh, Lord, some guy with dreads electrocuted my fish! All my life I've tried to forget the things I've seen — a crackhead breastfeeding a rat, a homeless man licking a Hot Pocket off the third rail of the G train! I've seen a blind guy bite a police horse! A puppy committed suicide after he saw our bathroom! I once bit into a burrito and there was a child's shoe in it! I've seen a hooker eat a tire! A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy's! The sewer people stole my skateboard! The projects I lived in were named after Zachary Taylor, generally considered to be one of the worst presidents of all time! I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! They were very drunk!

**Knuckles: **Was any of that true? I can't tell anymore.

**Bomberman: **some is, some isn't.

**Thermostat: **Which ones are true?

**Izzy M: **I'm gonna let you figure that out.

**Deus Ex Machina: **This is by far the weirdest things you have said at this point.

**Izzy M: **You should hear my middle school did for my "Sex Ed" leason.

**Bass Bitch: **I thought Bakugo said they wouldn't let you take sex ed cause of your late bloomer status.

**Izzy M: **They purposely showed me and all the other "Undesirables" the movie Teeth to try and scare us from wanting to have sex ever.

**Purple Haze: **Did it work?

**Izzy M: **Oh hell no. I might not know about certain things conerning sex, but I do know there is no such thing as Vagina Dentata.

**Bass Bitch: **Vagina Dentata?

**Izzy M: **The movie Teeth was about a woman who had teeth in her vagina that would bite off any unwanted invaders.

**Denki Sexbang: **That sounds terrifying.

**Izzy M: **Well it was a horror movie from the mid 2000's so…

**Ninja Mina: **So does that mean you and Jiro have?

**Bass Bitch: **No we haven't gone that far, although we do sleep together most nights.

**Izzy M: **Not in a sexual way but in the same way a married couple does. Just cuddling and a little bit of sleepwalking on occasion.

**Tentacle Hentai: **Sleepwalking?

**Izzy M: **I sleep walk on occasion. At least once a week.

**Tsukuyomi: **What do you do while sleepwalking?

**Izzy M: **At least once a week I will sleepwalk and grab a black sharpie and draw Xs on all the doors in the building.

**Ultra Furry: **So that explains the black Xs I wash off my door once a week.

**Bass Bitch: **I try to lead him back to one of our beds when this happens but it's harder than you'd think.

**Ninja Mina: **Why don't you just wake him up?

**Bomberman: **Your not supposed to wake up a sleepwalker. They tend to get violent and Deku has a quirk that breaks his bones if he miss uses or over uses it.

**Sonic: **It's better to ease them back to their bed without waking them in this situation.

**Anti-Grav: **Let's change the subject.

**Ninja Mina: **What's a good horror movie to watch on Halloween?

**Izzy M: **I usually watch the Evil Dead movies every year.

**Bass Bitch: **Slumber Party Massacre 2 is pretty funny for a horror movie.

**Izzy M: **You showed me that one. I thought the song and dance number was fucking funny. Unnecessary but funny.

**Izzy M: **BTW anyone mind if I invite some people in here?

**Sonic: **Your the admin. You can invite whoever you want.

**Izzy M: **Got it.

**Izzy M **has added **Miro Togata** and **Nejire Hado** to the groupchat

**Nejire Hado **has changed her username to **CutieDevil**

**Miro Togata**has changed his username to **Swole Vault Boy**

**CutieDevil: **What's this? Groupchat?

**Swole Vault Boy: **What brought this on? Why isn't Tamaki here?

**Izzy M: **I thought you two would be fun to add here and I asked Tamaki if he wanted in on this but he said and I quote: "Leave me the fuck out of it"

**Swole Vault Boy: **He would say that.

**CutieDevil: **Well this looks like it's going to be fun.

**Izzy M: **That it is.

**Authors Note: Chapter 27 Answers: All the stuff about Izuku's uncle and his childhood came from my actual childhood (Don't feel bad for me, I've already been working on putting all that behind me). Izuku using date rape drugs as a memory eraser is from the show Arested Development. Anyways it finally happened. I got Nejire and Miro in the groupchat.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	29. Halloween and MeiDay Parade

Class usernames (as of now)

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Denki Sexbang **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

2:00 pm on a Thursday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**CutieDevil: **So anyone have any plans for tonight?

**Ninja Mina: **We're having a halloween party in the dorm tonight.

**Izzy M: **I'm taking Eri trick or treating before the party.

**Bass Bitch: **I'm going with.

**Knuckles: **I can say that everyone else is gonna be at Mina's party

**CutieDevil: **I'm planning on dragging Mirio to a halloween party at the 3-A dorms.

**Swole Vault Boy: **Can't believe I agreed to that. Or that I agreed to dress up as Tin-Tin.

**CutieDevil: **You lost a bet.

**Izzy M: **Well I need to get costumed up.

**Bass Bitch: **Same

11:00 pm on a Thursday

**Anti-Grav: **That was interesting.

**Ninja Mina: **That was fun.

**Denki Sexbang: **I can't believe Midoriya brought Eri to the party. Not that I'm against it.

**Ninja Mina: **But that costume she had on was so cute.

**Deus Ex Machina: **I'm still not sure what she was dressed as.

**Izzy M: **She was dressed as a Pikachu. It's why Kaminari acted like he was being electrocuted when she hugged him.

**Anti-Grav: **By the way Deku, why were you dressed as a Mad Max reject?

**Izzy M: **My Fallout wanderer costume. I asked Hatsume to help me with it and she went a bit overboard. In fact.

**Izzy M **has added **Mei Hatsume** to the groupchat

**Mei Hatsume **has changed her username to **MeiDay Parade**

**MeiDay Parade: **Get it? MeiDay Parade, like the band.

**Bass Bitch: **Ok Izzy, she gets a point for that one.

**MeiDay Parade: **So I'm going over your Ideas and I'm sorry to say that whoever wanted the Pheromone Cologne, I'm sorry but it's unfeasable to make a spray that make women want to have sex with you and even if it was, I still wouldn't do it.

**Denki Sexbang: **That was Mineta and he was kicked out like three months ago.

**MeiDay Parade: **Oh. Well it actually is feasible but I was not going to tell him that.

**Bass Bitch: **How is it we are still hearing about that...thing.

**Bomberman: **Thing?

**Bass Bitch: **I couldn't think of anything better. Plus Eri is sleeping between me and Izzy.

**Froopy: **Adorable. Also ** Bass Bitch** nice Piper Wright costume.

**Bass Bitch: **Thanks. I still think Bakugo's Roy Mustang costume was clever AF.

**Bomberman: **I still can't believe Foureyes dressed as Maes Hughes.

**Knuckles: **I think Mina's Amy Rose costume was kind of lazy.

**Ninja Mina: **You really gonna say that after you went as Sōma Yukihira?

**Denki Sexbang: **She's got you there Kirishima.

**Knuckles: **You gonna go there Ric Flair?

**Anti-Grav: **So who suggested karaoke? Cause Deku singing Ninja Sex Party's Orgy For One was funny AF.

**Froppy: **Don't forget about Kirishima singing an acoustic version of Boyz In The Hood.

**Bass Bitch: **And Kirishima getting drunk and doing a metal version of the Pokemon theme.

**Ninja Mina: **I'm still upset you wouldn't let us watch the Alien movies.

**Sonic: **Ashido we discussed this. Not everyone can handle movies like that. I wouldn't let Midoriya play The Devil's Rejects for the same reason.

**Izzy M: **It wasn't Devil's Rejects, it was House Of 1,000 Corpses.

**CutieDevil: **So how was the party?

**Bass Bitch: **Alright for a halloween party.

**Izzy M: **Could have been better could have been worse. Eri had fun though.

**Swole Vault Boy: **At least she was able to have a good time.

**Izzy M: **Everyone wasd taking pictures wityh her.

**Swole Vault Boy: **Bit of spelling errors there.

**Izzy M: **Eri is sleeping on my dominant arm sothat's my cue to stop for the night.

**Bass Bitch: **Can confirm. Also She's not taking off her Pikachu costume.

**Authors Note: Happy Halloween: Chapter 28 Answers: Izuku's rant about his time in middle school is from Tracy Morgan's character on 30 Rock remembering his childhood. The movie Teeth is a real movie. Kaminari getting sent to the zoo during standardized tests is from Big Mouth. The rest of the references are kind of obvious.**

**ANNOUNCEMENT: Around Chapter 30 of this I'm gonna be releasing a new version of this that takes place about ten years after this. It's mostly because I have some jokes that if I did them in this they would be completely inappropriate (More so then the stuff I put in this already). It would be ok to put those jokes in a chat-fic that takes place after they graduate from UA.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	30. Memories

**It is recommended that you listen to Memories by Weezer while reading this chapter.**

Class usernames (as of now)

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Denki Sexbang **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

7:00 pm on a Friday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Ninja Mina: **Anyone remember when Bakugo and Midori beat Mineta like a tag team?

**Denki Sexbang: **I saved a screenshot from that

**Denki Sexbang **has posted a screenshot

**Knuckles:** BakuBro and MidoriBro found Mineta and are taking turns beating him to a pulp.

**Knuckles:** They are tagging in and out like a Mexican wrestling team.

**Knuckles:** So Manly.

**Deku:** That was fun. Sorry Mineta ruined your innocence Koda.

**Bomberman:** Twat waffle deserved the beating we gave him.

**Deku:** Twat waffle. That's a new one.

**Deku** has changed **Serial Grapist** 's username to **Twat Waffle**

**Acid Trip:** Bakugo and Midori, World's best tag team crew. If the hero thing doesn't work out you can always make a living fighting for pesos in Tijuana.

**End Screenshot**

**Bomberman: **Good times.

**Izzy M: **I'm shocked he didn't bleed purple.

**Sonic: **What about the time Midoriya tried to explain a niche masteerbation technique.

**Knuckles **has posted a screenshot

**Deku: **And that is just the first five steps to a prostate-assisted orgasm.

**Bass Bitch:** ….

**French Fry: **….

**Anti-Grav:** ….

**Bomberman: **….WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?

**Sonic:** Midoriya why do you even know that?

**Deku: **Being in the dorms is boring sometimes and I like googling fucked up shit when I'm bored.

**End Screenshot**

**Anti-Grav: **Kinda less shocking since Deku finally came out as pansexual.

**Denki Sexbang: **I still am not so sure what that means entirely.

**Izzy M: **You know, Pansexual, I'm sexualy attracted to pots and pans.

**Sonic: **I'm sure that's not what it means Midoriya.

**Bass Bitch: **He knows. He just wanted to make a bad joke to make light of an awkward discussion.

**Froopy: **Still not as weird as Midoriya getting banned from Burger King.

**Deus Ex Machina **has posted a screenshot

**Purple Haze: **I'm still wondering where he got the rockets. The roller skates I understand, but don't you need to be 18 years old to get fireworks.

**Bomberman: **I'm just wondering if the donkey survived.

**Knuckles: **I'm more shocked that it led to a lifetime ban from all the Burger Kings in the world.

**Deku: **I see that as a complete win. Those tacos are disgusting, and the sauce alone will make your heart feel like it's going to rip out of your chest like that scene in Alien with John Hurt and the chest burster.

**End Screenshot**

**Izzy M: **I think I can say that all of you know that based on the evidence that I sent that donkey through the window of that Burger King.

**Bomberman: **Fuck Burger King.

**Denki Sexbang: **Does anyone still have any screenshots from when Jiro taught us about informed consent?

** Izzy M **has posted a screenshot

**Deku: **Hey Kyoka, you want to engage in something fun? You can tie me up with your earphone jacks.

**Bass Bitch: **While that sounds fun, I'm gonna have to respectfully decline. Your drunk and it just wouldn't be right.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **What wouldn't be right?

**Bass Bitch: **Taking advantage of a drunk person, even if it's my boyfriend.

**Bomberman: **Respect.

**Knuckles: **So Manly.

**Acid Trip: **So that means if he was sober you would be into it?

**End Screenshot**

**Izzy M: **The next morning was...awkward.

**Bass Bitch: **Almost as awkward as the Alligator Fuckhouse?

**Bomberman **has posted a screenshot

**Deku: **She was drunk. She tried to order a pizza using a gamecube controller.

**Bomberman: **She also tried to give me and Deku the sex talk.

**Deku: **I don't know what the Alligator Fuckhouse is but I'm sure after that bit is when I started drinking.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo **has renamed the chat to **Alligator Fuckhouse**

**Deku: **Why?

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **Cause you almost broke my spine, dick.

**Knuckles: **Seems like a fitting revenge. BTW I looked up what an Alligator Fuckhouse is

**Purple Haze: **What is it?

**Knuckles: **one person bites the neck of the other, locks their arms and legs down and goes into a deathroll , all while maintaining insertion.

**Deku: **How?

**Knuckles: **Urban Dictionary.

**Bass Bitch: **Of course.

**End Screenshot**

**Discount Sue Storm: **Enlightening.

**Bootleg Spiderman: **As enlightening as Midoriya's gaming habits?

**Izzy M: **Oh God! Please NO.

** Thermostat **has posted a screenshot

**Deku: **Oh God what have I done?

**Anti-Grav: **What's wrong, Deku?

**Deku: **Kyoka was playing Sims 4 on my gaming PC.

**Anti-Grav: **That seems like a completely normal thing.

**Deku: **I kinda had some mods installed and well….

**Bomberman:** What he's trying to say is that he had some sex mods installed and the gf played them. Am I right on this one Deku?

**Deku: **Right on the fucking head Kachan.

**Deku's Thigh Tattoo: **So Jiro played what is essentially a porn game you had on your PC?

**End Screenshot**

**Tentacle Hentai: **Not as bad as Midoriya's school memories.

** Anti-Grav **has posted a screenshot

**Izzy M: **It's all coming back to me. Oh my God! I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs! I watched a prostitute stab a clown! Our basketball hoop was a rib cage – a rib cage! Why did you bring me here? I blocked all this stuff out for a reason! Oh, Lord, some guy with dreads electrocuted my fish! All my life I've tried to forget the things I've seen — a crackhead breastfeeding a rat, a homeless man licking a Hot Pocket off the third rail of the G train! I've seen a blind guy bite a police horse! A puppy committed suicide after he saw our bathroom! I once bit into a burrito and there was a child's shoe in it! I've seen a hooker eat a tire! A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy's! The sewer people stole my skateboard! The projects I lived in were named after Zachary Taylor, generally considered to be one of the worst presidents of all time! I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! They were very drunk!

**Knuckles: **Was any of that true? I can't tell anymore.

**Bomberman: **some is, some isn't.

**Thermostat: **Which ones are true?

**Izzy M: **I'm gonna let you figure that out.

**End Screenshot**

**Knuckles: **Was any of that true?

**Izzy M: **The stuff that's feasible is true. The pack of dogs didn't take over and successfully run a Wendey's. It was a Subway.

**Ultra Furry: **Your messing with them, aren't you?

**Thermostat: **As much as I've enjoyed this trip down memory lane, can we stop?

**Izzy M: **I agree

**Authors Note: Chapter 29 Answers: Mei's username is a reference to the band Mayday Parade. 30 chapters. WOOOOOOO. I'm sorry I did a clip...Show?...Chapter? I wanted to try something new.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	31. Bangkok and 1-B

Class usernames (as of now)

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Denki Sexbang **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

5:00 pm on a Thursday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Anti-Grav: **Anyone see Deku anywhere today?

**Sonic: **Now that you mention it. I don't think he's been here all day.

**Bomberman: **He's with his parents. Apparently something came up that needs his attention.

**Ninja Mina: **What do you think it is?

**Sonic: **I don't think you need to know what's going on.

**Ninja Mina: **Jiro, I know you know what's going on. So spill.

**Bass Bitch: **I won't say what it is but the phrases: Bangkok, transgender hooker, and face tattoo were involved

**Denki Sexbang: **Sounds like a dated comedy from the 2000's

9:00 pm

**Izzy M: **Ok that was...Interesting.

**Bass Bitch: **Baby steps.

**Izzy M: **Ok you see, during his recent trip to Bangkok my dad and his friend got real drunk and he got a face tattoo and his friend got chlamidia from a transgender hooker.

**Bomberman: **What is he gonna do about the tattoo?

**Izzy M: **He was gonna laser it off but I suggested he get a tattoo in the same color as his skin tone to cover it with no scarring being left.

**Bass Bitch: **Smart.

**Denki Sexbang: **Your dads awesome.

**Ninja Mina: **Bangkok. Tijuana's abusive stepfather.

5:00 pm on a Friday

**Denki Sexbang: **If Jesus could walk on water, could he swim on land?

**Izzy M: **Probably not.

**Sonic: **If I may.

**Sonic **has invited **Itsuka Kendo**, **Setsuna Tokage**, **Ibara Shiozaki**, **Pony Tsunotori**,** Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu**, and **Nieto Monoma **to the groupchat

**Itsuku Kendo **has changed her username to **Battle Fist**

**Setsuna Tokage **has changed her username to **Reptar**

**Ibara Shiozaki **has changed her username to **Do It For The Vine**

**Pony Tsunotori **has changed her username to **My Little Pony**

**Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu **has changed his username to **Literal Iron Man**

**Nieto Monoma **has changed his username to** Genderswapped Rouge**

**Genderswapped Rouge: **Why are we in this pitiful excuse of a groupchat?

**Battle Fist: **Behave yourself.

**Reptar: **They invited us. Have some courtesy.

**Do It For The Vine: **The bible says love thy neighbor.

**My Little Pony: **Besides it's only you who hates them.

**Battle Fist: **Why do you hate them anyways?

**Genderswapped Rouge: **Because they get more attention than us.

**Izzy M: **I wouldn't call getting attacked by villians "getting attention" I'd call it getting attacked by villains.

**Genderswapped Rouge: **But it still gets you attention.

**Knuckles: **Therapy and getting told by a doctor their "won't be any permanent damage" is not the attention you want. Trust me.

**Genderswapped Rouge: **Whatever.

**Izzy M: **Is he always like that?

**My Little Pony: **Always.

**Literal Iron Man: **He has a cork board that has all of your "Accomplishments" tacked to it.

**Do It For The Vine: **I've tried telling him that Jesus loves him multiple times but that only makes him mader.

**Reptar: **We've told you. It's because he's an atheist.

**Literal Iron Man: **He even says when your not around that religion is for idiots.

**Izzy M: **Ok now I'm not religious but I'm not an atheist but I don't think religion is for idiots.

**Do It For The Vine: **What do you mean your not religious?

**Izzy M: **My dad was catholic and when I was young we would practice the catholic religion but my mother saw a nun hit me with the yardstick because I reached for a crayon with my left hand.

**Bass Bitch: **WHAT...WHAT THE FUCK!

**Izzy M: **They thought left handedness was a sign of the devil. I wasn't even left handed. It was on my left side so I reached with my left hand.

**Knuckles: **So you weren't…

**Izzy M: **Molested by a priest? No. I was a virgin alter boy.

**Anti-Grav: **That's a relief.

**Do It For The Vine: **Not all priests were like that.

**Literal Iron Man: **Makes the South Park jokes more messed up.

**Knuckles: **What jokes?

**Literal Iron Man: **In one of the video games there's a fight with priests and one of them uses a rosary stye anal beads as a weapon.

**Izzy M: **That was The Fractured But Whole. The first one you had to dodge your dad's balls during a bossfight.

**Purple Haze: **I came in at the worst time.

**Bomberman: **Can't be the worst thing you've walked in on.

**Purple Haze: **Walking in on Midoriya and Jiro after their date night was almost as bad. So much smoke.

**Ninja Mina: **Spill. NOW.

**Purple Haze: **They were smoking weed and Jiro was painting on Midoriya.

**Izzy M: **Last time I do X.

**Bass Bitch: **I had a good time.

**Izzy M: **Everyone has a good time on X.

**Authors Note: No answers for chapter 30. X=ecstasy, introduced some of the 1-B students, finally. BTW Tokages original username was Hot Yoshi.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	32. Spelling Corections and Special Requests

Class usernames (as of now)

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Denki Sexbang **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Do It For The Vine **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Genderswapped Rouge** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

7:00 pm on a Saturday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Bass Bitch:** I'm sorry but this is bugging me.

**Reptar: **What

**Izzy M **has changed **Genderswapped Rouge**'s username to **Genderswapped Rogue**

**Genderswapped Rogue: **Why the fuck have you messed with my name. It was perfect.

**Bass Bitch: **You mis-spelled Rogue.

**Genderswapped Rogue: **Shut it bitch. You and that bastard boyfriend of yours don't scare me.

**Izzy M: **Hi Monoma

**Genderswapped Rogue: **Ohhh shit…

**Izzy M: **Did I hear you call me a bastard?

**Genderswapped Rogue: **…..

**Izzy M: **Cause I think you meant ball-buster.

**Do It For The Vine:** He just dropped his phone and ran as fast as he could.

**Battle Fist: **Thanks for the new way of shutting him up.

**Izzy M: **Your welcome.

**My Little Pony: **Does anyone else think Midoriya looks like a Pokemon trainer?

**Reptar: **He does.

**Izzy M: **If anything Kaminari looks like a Pokemon trainer.

**Denki Sexbang: **Thank you for that one.

**Bass Bitch: **How would that play out?

**Ninja Mina: **With him fighting a Pikachu over an Arby's sandwich while holding a bong between his legs.

**Izzy M: **Greatest mental image ever.

**Bass Bitch: **Even better than the image from when Mineta was punted off a bridge?

**Izzy M: **Yes. Much better than that.

**Literal Iron Man: **At least it wasn't like the time Monoma tried to break Bakugo's spirit.

**Reptar: **Calling Bakugo a pussy. How did that sound like a good idea to him?

**Battle Fist: **I was with my parents that day.

**Denki Sexbang: **I think Bakugo burnt all the skin off his hands that day.

**My Little Pony: **So he had second degree burns all over his torso and Midoriya destroyed one of his balls.

**Izzy M: **His left nut is in my trophy case.

**Bass Bitch: **He dipped it in bronze.

**Izzy M: **Don't worry about me. I'm damaged.

**Reptar: **What?

**Anti-Grav: **He had a bad childhood.

**Knuckles: **Neglectful school, alcoholic father, dead uncle, abusive uncle and a youtuber cousin.

**Izzy M: **And a morman uncle. Don't forget the morman uncle.

**Denki Sexbang: **Sounds like a standup routine.

**Ninja Mina: **From a very damaged comedian.

**My Little Pony: **How is he so…

**Froppy: **Normal.

**My Little Pony: **Let's go with that.

**Izzy M: **Drugs and alcohol.

**Genderswapped Rogue: **So you 1-A bastards are on drugs now? How the mighty have fallen.

**Izzy M: **Maybe you should smoke a joint and find yourself.

**Battle Fist: **I agree with Midoriya.

**Genderswapped Rogue:** I will copy your quirk, shove my fist up your ass with your quirk so you will spend the rest of your life shiting in a bag.

**Battle Fist: **You couldn't get to my ass. You couldn't even get to copy my quirk.

**Literal Iron Man: **And like that she knocked him out.

**Reptar: **It was like he was Kenny Rogers in that Jackass parody.

**Do It For The Vine: **Not even Jesus could have saved him.

**Battle Fist: **Shiozaki I give you expressed permission to throw a bible at Monoma whenever you think he "Needs Jesus in his life"

**Do It For The Vine: **Got it.

**Izzy M: **Have fun.

**Do It For The Vine: **I will.

**_Private Chat Between Izuku and Kyoka_**

**Jax: **It's time.

**That Green Gentleman: **You sure?

**Jax: **My room tonight.

**That Green Gentleman:** Why not my room?

**Jax: **Because you have to many posters up and the eyes follow you around the room.

**That Green Gentleman: **Got it. Also taking down all my posters. Those eyes are starting to creep me out.

**Jax: **FOCUS! My. Room. Tonight.

**That Green Gentleman: **See you tonight.

**Authors Note: Chapter 31 answers: The Bangkok trip is from The Hangover Part II, Kaminari's question, "If Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?" And Izuku's Answer, "Probably not" are from Bo Burnham's song #Deep, Monoma thinking religion is for idiots is a description of Brian's beliefs on Family Guy, the line "I'm a virgin alter boy" is from the Hinder song Bad Mothafucka.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	33. Aftermath

Class usernames (as of now)

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Denki Sexbang **\- Denki Kaminari

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Bootleg Spiderman** \- Hanta Sero

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Do It For The Vine **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Genderswapped Rouge** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

11:00 am on a Sunday

**Class Of 1-A Fem Squad**

**Ochaco-Taco: **Anyone hear any strange noises last night?

**IvisaBitch: **I heard it to.

**Genderswapped Edward Elric: **I think I heard someone yell the phrase "Snootchie Bootchies" multiple times

**Froppy: **I think it sounded like Midoriya's voice that said it.

**Alien Queen: **So does that mean?

**Hot Knives Chau: **What are you talking about?

**Alien Queen: **Admit it!

**Hot Knives Chau: **Admit what?

**Ochaco-Taco:** The sounds coming from your room last night. What were they?

**Hot Knives Chau: **Noises? What noises?

**InvisaBitch: **Your sex noises.

**Hot Knives Chau:** THERE WEREN'T ANY SEX NOISES COMING FROM MY ROOM! YOUR JUST IMAGINING THINGS!

**InvisaBitch: **You do realize our rooms are on the same floor right?

**Ochaco-Taco: **And I'm right above you.

**Froppy: **Also you were really loud. I could hear what I can assume to be Midoriya's safe word and I'm on the top floor.

**Alien-Queen: **Sounded like you had fun last night.

**Hot Knives Chau: **Ok.

**InvisaBitch: **How was it?

**Hot Knives Chau: **Haven't you heard that saying? A gentleman never asks and a lady never tells.

**InvisaBitch: **Damn you Jiro.

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Knuckles: **Hey Midoriya, how come you didn't come play video games last night?

**Izzy M: **I had something I had to do last night.

**Ninja Mina: **Something named Jiro perhaps.

**Izzy M: **MINA YOU BITCH!

**Sonic: **Midoriya, calling your female classmates something that vulgar is extremely inappropriate.

**Izzy M: **Sorry Iida. Sorry Ashido.

**Ninja Mina: **Just the reaction I was hoping for.

**Denki Sexbang: **What?

**Ninja Mina: **There's a reason why he was looking dehydrated this morning. And why Jiro was walking funny.

**Bootleg Spiderman: **So that means…

**Denki Sexbang: **Midoriya and Jiro…

**Bootleg Spiderman: **Finally parked the hot-rod in the garage.

**Izzy M: **That was the Best. Euphemism. Ever. Of all time.

**Discount Sue Storm: **And it's totally true.

**Anti-Grav: **I was in the room right above. Let's just say Deku's very...Whats the phrase I'm looking for Momo?

**Deus Ex Machina: **Snootchie Bootchies.

**Izzy M: **If anyone needs me I'll just be jumping off the roof now.

**Bass Bitch: **Damn you all.

**Denki Sexbang: **WE'RE NOT WORTHY

**Bootleg Spiderman: **WE'RE NOT WORTHY

**Reptar **has changed **Bootleg Spiderman**'s username to **Wayne**

**My Little Pony **has changed **Denki Sexbang**'s username to **Garth**

**Wayne: **Shwing.

**Garth: **I really don't have to much to say right now.

**Genderswapped Rouge: **How is it that Mr. Glass Cannon can get some when I can't?

**Battle Fist: **He's got that thing that you don't have.

**Genderswapped Rouge: **And what's that.

**Do It For The Vine: **A likable personality.

**My Little Pony: **He doesn't brag about how he's better than everyone else on a constant basis.

**Reptar: **He doesn't look like an 80's villain like you do.

**Literal Iron Man: **Oh my God it's true. He looks like the villian from every 80's teen movies.

**Reptar **has changed **Genderswapped Rouge**'s username to **Johnny Lawrence**

**Izzy M: **He does kind of look like the villain from The Karate Kid.

**Johnny Lawrence: **SHUT YOUR MOUTH YOU BARNEY STINSON MOTHERFUCKER!

**Izzy M: **I've only been with one person. Not 230. Also

**Izzy M **has banned **Johnny Lawrence **from the groupchat.

**Izzy M: **Suck on that you Justin Bieber looking asshole.

**Authors Note: Chapter 32 answers: Izuku's interaction with Monoma is from Tifa and Rude's second meeting in Final Fantasy VII Machinabridged, Izuku's jokes about his childhood are from Christopher Titus' standup.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	34. Gloryholes and Secret Plans

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Wayne** \- Hanta Sero

**Garth **\- Denki Kaminari

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Do It For The Vine **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Johnny Lawrence** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

7:00 pm on a Monday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Izzy M: **Should I add him back?

**Sonic: **It would be the proper thing to do but…

**Anti-Grav: **He's a prolapsed asshole and he deserves to be banned.

**Garth: **Are you talking about Monoma or Mineta.

**Bomberman: **Either one is pretty bad.

**Bass Bitch: **I say we let him in just so we can fuck with him.

**Izzy M: **In that case.

**Izzy M **has added **Johnny Lawrence **to the groupchat

**Johnny Lawrence: **Why am I back?

**Izzy M: **Shits and giggles.

**Bass Bitch: **We also needed that asshole that everyone loves to hate and we got rid of Mineta months ago so he's out.

**Reptar: **Why did he get expelled exactly?

**Froppy: **He was a sexuall predator to all the female students.

**Izzy M: **He had the best excuse ever though. He said to Nezu and I quote "I know that no means no but her ass ment yes."

**My Little Pony: **I can see why he was expelled for that. In America that can get you arrested.

**Izzy M: **Of course they also found the gloryholes in the locker rooms and the bathrooms.

**Battle Fist: **those walls were brick.

**Reptar: **And six inches thick.

**Izzy M: **It's kind of funny if you think about it.

**Wayne: **He thought his dick was that big.

**Wayne: **It wasn't. I saw him in the locker room.

**Izzy M: **And the mellon incident.

**Do It For The Vine: **Mellon incident?

**Izzy M: **You don't want to know. Also.

**Izzy M **has changed **Do It For The Vine**'s username to **Poison Ivy**

**Reptar: **How did none of us think of that?

**Johnny Lawrence: **Cause we are trying to be better than those 1-A tossers.

**My Little Pony: **Tossers?

**Garth: **The same as a wanker.

**Discount Sue Storm: **How's your scrotum doing Monoma?

**Johnny Lawrence: **How's it going knowing nobody can see you?

**Discount Sue Storm: **At least I still have all the parts of my body intact.

**Johnny Lawrence: **Oh you invisible bitch.

**MeiDay Parade: **Oh by the way, invisible girl. That device you requested is ready.

**Ninja Mina: **What device.

**MeiDay Parade: **I built her a device that she wears on her neck that will make her able to control her quirk. I got the idea from that device from the I-Island incident. It looks like a choker.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Thanks you terrifying woman.

**MeiDay Parade: **Your welcome.

**Knuckles: **So we can see Hagakure now?

**Izzy M: **Neat.

**_Private chat between Izuku and Kyoka_**

**That Green Gentleman: **Do they know anything?

**Jax: **They know nothing.

**That Green Gentleman: **Good. Operation Merry Motherfuckin' X-mas is on.

**Jax: **You really need to figure out how to come up with better names for these things.

**That Green Gentleman: **Says you.

**Jax: **Says the guy who named his best move Full Cowl.

**That Green Gentleman: **I think it's an okay name.

**Jax: **You couldn't go with something like...All Spark or Brawler?

**That Green Gentleman: **Shit. Those are way better.

**Jax: **told you. Oh and I'm the alpha tonight.

**That Green Gentleman: **Oh god no.

**Authors Note: Chapter 33 Answers: Snootchie Bootchies is from Jay and Silent Bob. I read the phrase "Finally parked the hot-rod in the garage." on TvTropes (Not sure where it's from). Kaminari and Sero's new usernames are from Wayne's World, along with the phrase "We're not worthy". Izuku's reaction to the phrase "Finally parked the hot-rod in the garage." is from Red vs Blue. Johnny Lawrence was the villain from the first Karate Kid movie.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	35. Plans and Invasions of Privacy

**There is an announcement following this chapter.**

**And now for your regularly scheduled groupchat.**

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Wayne** \- Hanta Sero

**Garth **\- Denki Kaminari

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Poison Ivy **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Johnny Lawrence** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

6:00 pm on a Tuesday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Johnny Lawrence: **Ok why was one of you 1-A bastards walking around naked in the snow?

**Swole Vault Boy: **What?

**CutieDevil: **The green haired one who took out Overhaul.

**Sonic: **Well, you see…

**Anti-Grav: **It's kind of a funny story.

**Bomberman: **Deku wanted to mess with Pichu and Shitty Hair so he hid inside the couch.

**Ninja Mina: **Unfortunately the couch was leather.

**Garth: **It was interesting seeing Midoriya get birthed from a couch.

**Knuckles: **It was like seeing a cow birth.

**Izzy M: **I know it's cold and snowing but I don't feel the cold at all.

**Sonic: **Midoriya. I insist you come inside and put some clothes on this instant.

**Izzy M: **You and your rules. Wear pants outside. Don't sew yourself into a couch. Don't brew alcohol in the basement.

**Garth: **We have a basement?

**Izzy M: **Where did you think those weird sounds were coming from?

**Garth: **I thought those sounds were from Tokoyami.

**Tsukuyomi: **Well fuck you to.

**Wayne: **Wait. Midoriyas been making alcohol in the basement?

**Izzy M: **I was doing it in my room originally. Turns out toilet wine isn't that great.

**Ninja Mina: **Toilet wine? How exactly?

**Izzy M: **I'm glad you asked. You see you mix together juice from about 6 to 10 oranges, 4 packets of ketchup or raisins, two slices of moldy bread, 2 cans of fruit cocktail, and about 60 packets of sugar in a plastic bag and pour warm water over it for five to seven days.

**Bass Bitch: **Is that why there was a garbage bag in your toilet that one time?

**Izzy M: **Yes. it is what they call in prison a Pruno Grigio.

**Garth: **Is it any good?

**Izzy M: **It was the most foulest thing I'd ever drank. And that includes that energy drink that Kachan likes to make.

**Bomberman: **It wasn't that bad. You're just weak.

**Izzy M: **It was juice from several Carolina Reapers and a combination of bulk up powder and some of those energy pills and boner pills you get at a gas station.

**Izzy M: **MY BODY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!

**Bass Bitch: **We had to quarantine him for five days after that.

**Poison Ivy: **So that's why you had him chained to a cross during spring break. I just thought you were getting into the Easter spirit.

**Izzy M: **It was biblical.

**Bass Bitch: **Speaking of being in the holiday spirit. Me and Izzy are planning a get together at the 1-A dorms next week for christmas.

**Izzy M: **There will be liqueur and weed for everyone who wants it.

**Battle Fist: **I'm in.

**Reptar: **Same.

**My Little Pony: **What should I bring?

**Literal Iron Man: **If you have any wasabi vodka I'm in.

**Johnny Lawrence: **Sounds like a trainwreck. I'm in.

**Izzy M: **You are bringing your own weed and booze.

**Johnny Lawrence: **Who says anything about me smoking and drinking.

**Knuckles: **Pussy

**Garth: **Ass

**Izzy M: **Bitch

**Johnny Lawrence: **FINE. I'll drink and get stoned with you 1-A bastards.

**Izzy M: **It's like my dad says. Get drunk and get stoned with someone and your bros for life.

**Purple Haze: **Is that why you hang out with that mall Santa?

**Izzy M: **He sells me some good seasonal weed. Like Winter Wonder Weed, Rudolph The Red Eyed Reindeer, It's a Weederful Life, Haunaku Hash, Kwanzaa Cookout and Holiday Helper.

**Discount Sue Storm: **That was almost as funny as that time Midoriya started reading from that book Ochaco was always writing in.

**Anti-Grav: **You read from that? Deku you bitch.

**Izzy M: **Hey don't sell yourself short. Your a great writer. I really liked the grape headed pervert. He was funny. Dark, but funny. Also the green haired guy is an idiot.

**Anti-Grav: **Oh my god.

**Garth: **How is this guy 4th in the class?

**Bass Bitch: **He loves to do the impossible. Remember when he lit that swimming pool on fire?

**Sonic: **I'm gonna point out that he lit it on fire from below the surface.

**Izzy M: **I was trying to light a joint.

**Bass Bitch: **So you had to break the rules of physics.

**Izzy M: **Yes.

**Authors Note: Chapter 34 Answers: Finally explained why Mineta was expelled.**

**Announcement: I'm planning on doing a sort of Q&A series involving the characters from My Hero Academia. I will put up a prologue for this that will leave some breathing room for questions. This will be similar to Shadow Shinobi57's Q&A Trip series so I plan on making this as juvenile and inappropriate as I can so expect it to be rated M. The first few characters involved will be Izuku, Ochaco, Bakugo, Iida, Todoroki and Mineta so I need questions for the first official chapter. The topic will be family history for the first chapter and I will announce the theme for the next chapter at the end of each chapter. Also if anyone wants to appear as a guest who asks questions put in a small description of how you want to be represented in this (I will be putting random jokes with each entrance.) Also feel free to ask me some questions that I will answer in character.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	36. Granny Hooters Magazine

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Wayne** \- Hanta Sero

**Garth **\- Denki Kaminari

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Poison Ivy **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Johnny Lawrence** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

7:00 pm on a Monday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Ninja Mina: **That party was wack.

**Anti-Grav: **Wack?

**Ninja Mina: **Yeah. Wack.

**Bass Bitch: **Better than Kaminari's rap demo.

**Garth: **You just had to bring that up, didn't you.

**Izzy M: **I didn't think it was that bad.

**Bomberman: **Your just saying that because he let you do the B-side.

**Izzy M: **I also liked the name.

**Garth: **Conspiracy to Commit Pimping.

**Knuckles: **Wasn't the title track called Thinking 'Bout Pimping?

**Izzy M: **And the side b track was my acoustic cover of Cat Stevens' Morning Has Broken.

**Garth: **It was a very complex and emotional demo.

**Bomberman: **About as complex and emotional as what I assume could be Deku during sex.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Are you implying Midoriya cries after sex?

**Izzy M: **I can see why he'd think that. I don't have a strong case saying otherwise.

**Knuckles: **There is no shame in teargasming.

**Purple Haze: **WHAT...WHAT THE FUCK?

**Thermostat: **I assume it means when you cry when orgasming.

**Bass Bitch: **Izzy has never once cried after sex...Except for that time with the mousetrap.

**Ninja Mina: **Deets!

**Bass Bitch: **Hell no!

**Izzy M: **Nothing! Happened!

**Discount Sue Storm: **Judging from the context clues. I think Midoriya somehow got a mousetrap to trigger on his junk.

**Izzy M: **God Damn you Hagakure.

**Discount Sue Storm: **I was just guessing.

**Tails: **Anyone else picture that happening?

**Anti-Grav: **I can't not picture it.

**Bomberman: **It brings up images from an old Tom and Jerry cartoon.

**Reptar: **Ah yes, the moments when Tom would get his tail stuck in mouse traps.

**My Little Pony: **Classic.

**Izzy M: **It wasn't like that...Ok it was kind of like that.

**Bass Bitch: **It was kind of funny.

**Izzy M: **Et tu Kyoka?

**Literal Iron Man: **Getting back on track. Where did everyone end up after that party last night?

**Bass Bitch:** I woke up in the empty hot tub in the basement and found Izzy cuddling a pineapple on a shelf in the laundry room.

**Battle Fist: **That's why Monoma was complaining about his pineapple disappearing.

**Froppy: **I woke up in Momo's bed with Kirishima.

**Purple Haze: **I think I was under Midoriya's bed. Also he has a box of money and several copies of Granny Hooters magazine.

**Izzy M: **The only ones from the box Mineta didn't even want.

**Johnny Lawrence: **GRANNY HOOTERS! Where?

**Izzy M: **Under my bed.

**Poison Ivy: **He just ran as fast as he could from the 1-B dorm.

**Battle Fist: **Wait. Come back.

**Literal Iron Man: **Where's he going?

**Johnny Lawrence: **To get me some Granny Hooters. YEEHAW. Gonna be a cowboy Tetsutetsu. YEEHAW.

**Reptar: **He's running towards 1-A's dorms.

**Izzy M: **Ok Monoma just ran from my room holding a stack of magazines.

**Bass Bitch: **He left a vapor trail.

**Garth: **It's like the Quicksilver scenes in Age of Ultron.

**Ninja Mina: **All that for Granny Hooters magazine.

**Izzy M: **I don't know what he could get from that. I got two pages in and got violently ill.

**Poison Ivy: **Ok Monoma just crashed into a wall. I don't know whether to help him or laugh.

**Izzy M: **Take all the money from his wallet and bring it to me. Fucker didn't pay for the magazines.

**Reptar: **Done.

**Sonic: **Midoriya…

**Izzy M: **Before you start. Daddy needs to get paid.

**Bass Bitch: **Besides he has been trying to sell them for a while.

**Ninja Mina: **Yo knew he had them?

**Bass Bitch: **And I made fun of him for having them and for hiding them under his bed.

**Garth: **Better than Mineta's hiding place.

**Wayne: **What hiding place?

**Garth: **Exactly.

**Izzy M: **Also, how did Kaminari manage to light a pool on fire?

**Garth: **Lots and lots of isopropyl alcohol.

**Izzy M: **Never let him near a funeral home.

**Knuckles: **Why?

**Izzy M: **Cause they use isopropyl alcohol instead of embalming fluid these days.

**Authors Note: Chapter 35 answers: Izuku's plan to mess with Kaminari and Kirishima is from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, I got the recipe for toilet wine from Tosh.0, The strains of weed Izuku mentioned were from A Harold And Kumar Christmas, Izuku reading from Ochaco's diary and thinking it's fictional is from the canceled Fox show Titus, and Izuku breaking the laws of physics to light a joint is from Futurama. The Caroline Reaper is the hottest pepper known to man.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	37. Bear Attacks and Geezer Pleasers

**Reader Discretion Advised: I don't believe stereotypes are right or factual. I do however believe they are hilarious.**

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Wayne** \- Hanta Sero

**Garth **\- Denki Kaminari

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Poison Ivy **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Johnny Lawrence** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

7:00 pm on a Wednesday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Anti-Grav: **So anyone do anything fun for new years?

**Purple Haze: **I listened to goth metal and smoked weed.

**Bomberman: **You do that every night.

**Purple Haze:** This time I smoked my namesake.

**Ninja Mina: **Noice.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Wouldn't that be cannibalism?

**Deus Ex Machina: **About as cannibalistic as Midoriya eating a cinnamon roll.

**Ninja Mina: **Anyone else picturing a cinnamon roll eating another cinnamon roll?

**Discount Sue Storm: **Best mental image ever!

**Battle Fist: **Better than the image of Monoma and his copies of Granny Hooters magazine.

**Izzy M: **Tell him he still owes me 150 dollars American for those magazines.

**Literal Iron Man: **He said something about how nobody pays for pornno anymore.

**Izzy M: **Tell him I want my money or I'm breaking his god-damn legs.

**Bass Bitch: **He'll do it to.

**Garth: **I've seen him do it.

**Reptar: **When?

**Garth: **At a head shop. He bought a really expensive bong and some guy tried to steal it and he beat the shit out of that guy with a metal bong.

**Bomberman: **THAT WAS YOU!

**Thermostat: **I heard it was a bear attack.

**Wayne: **Woodland creature or chubby gay dude?

**My Little Pony: **I heard it was both. Working together in a glorious display of nature and lgbtq pride.

**Izzy M: **There was a chubby gay guy in the store.

**Deus Ex Machina: **How do you know he was gay exactly? It could have just been a regular chubby guy.

**Izzy M: **Cause he was wearing tight whight pants with no shirt and was holding sparklers and a rainbow pride flag while eating a cheeseburger.

**Garth: **I don't know. Sounds pretty gay to me.

**Poison Ivy: **Ok. Monoma finally left his room and his left arm is like super buff.

**Literal Iron Man: **It's like that one scene in Family Guy when the neighbor discovered internet porn.

**Izzy M: **In that case.

**Izzy M **Has changed **Johnny Lawrence**'s username to **Geezer Pleaser**

**Geezer Pleaser: **Why?

**Bass Bitch: **Cause your obsession with Granny Hooters magazine.

**Izzy M: **I find your taste in porn disturbing. Would you like me to recogmend you a therapist?

**Sonic: **What is that referencing exactly? You make way too many references.

**Izzy M: **Clippy the Microsoft office mascot.

**Anti-Grav: **So Deku, what did you do over new years?

**Izzy M: **I went to an Asian bar's basement and played ping pong with some guys...Lets just say they were the type of guys who don't like losing very much.

**Ninja Mina: **Then what happened?

**Izzy M: **They worked me over good. Then when I thought it was over. They shoved a paddle up my ass.

**Garth: **Jesus. I don't know what I'd do if someone shoved a paddle handle up my ass.

**Izzy M: **It wasn't the handle.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Then that means…

**Izzy M: **I'm damaged goods.

**Bomberman: **I know for a fact that is bullshit.

**Knuckles: **It was?

**Bass Bitch: **Bakugo's telling the truth. I was at Izzy's parents for new years and Bakugo's family was there also.

**Ninja Mina: **That's a relief.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Any good drunk Midoriya incidents?

**Bass Bitch: **Well he tried to kiss Bakugo at midnight and landed in his neighbors' cactus garden when Bakugo threw him over the railing.

**Izzy M: **I was surrounded by cacti.

**Purple Haze: **It's cactus.

**Izzy M: **IT'S CACTI! Either way it was painfull as fuck.

**Bomberman: **Serves you right.

**Izzy M: **I said I was sorry.

**Bass Bitch: **Why are you apologizing? It was funny as hell.

**Authors Note: Chapter 36 Answers: The title and tracks from Kaminari's demo were from The Jim Jeffries Show, the phrase "Teargasming" is from Scrubs, Shinso's reaction to teargasming is from JonTron, the magazine Granny Hooters and Monoma's reaction to it are from Steve and Larson's Ten FTW series from Machinima. Also as it turns out the Carolina Reaper is no longer the hottest pepper in the world. It is now Pepper X that's the hottest.**

**Also: I still need questions for a Q&A thing I'm doing where you ask the characters the questions, The first topic is family history and the first few characters are Izuku, Ochaco, Bakugo, Iida, Todoroki and Mineta. Feel free to ask as many questions as you want and make them as juvenile and inappropriate as possible.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	38. Lesser Jedi and Drunk Dragon

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Wayne** \- Hanta Sero

**Garth **\- Denki Kaminari

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Poison Ivy **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Geezer Pleaser** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

5:00 pm on a Saturday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Garth: **Anyone notice anything...weird...about Midoriya?

**Thermostat: **I've been wondering about that also.

**Bass Bitch: **He ate like three pounds of shrooms so he's a bit out of it.

**Izzy M: **Everything looks like a fucking cartoon right now.

**Garth: **Are you serious?

**Izzy M: **I have always dreamed of getting this high. Thank you Jesus-God.

**Poison Ivy: **Jesus-God?

**Deus Ex Machina: **Midoriya is a...Interesting guy.

**Izzy M: **Also, thank you Doughboy.

**Reptar: **Doughboy? Like the Pillsbury Doughboy?

**Ninja Mina: **Midoriya is the leader of a cult that worships the Pillsbury Doughboy.

**Poison Ivy: **I don't think God will like you worshiping a false entity.

**Izzy M: **First: I'm not the leader, my dad is. I'm just the Mega Pope. Second: It's something my dad did to get out of jury duty.

**Reptar: **Can anyone join?

**Izzy M: **The Doughboy accepts you into his service.

**Literal Iron Man: **This is by far the dumbest thing I've ever seen. I'm in.

**My Little Pony: **This won't be like that town my uncle lives in? Cause it's a purely catholics only town.

**Garth: **They have those in America?

**My Little Pony: **It's in Florida. One of my uncle's neighbors built a 60 foot replica of the Tower of Babel in his front lawn.

**Geezer Pleaser: **That is kind of funny.

**My Little Pony: **You may be laughing but my uncle's property values are in the shitter.

**Izzy M: **I think my dad trolled the guy who runs that town.

**Knuckles: **How?

**Izzy M: **He tried to buy a place and asked how many alter boys he had to molest be allowed to live there.

**Bass Bitch: **Your dad is the best.

**Garth: **He's my spirit animal.

**Izzy M: **Just for that Kaminari, I will do one task for you. Just name it.

**Garth: **Tie your bathrobe shut when you walk around in the morning.

**Izzy M: **NEVER!

**Invisible Girl: **Glad to see your taking my words of wisdom seriously.

**Izzy M: **Nudism has freed me.

**My Little Pony: **Just be lucky it's him and not that weird headed guy that kept trying to lure me into the gardening shed.

**Reptar: **You would think he would get the message after she shoved that horn up his ass the first time.

**My Little Pony: **Thick end first.

**Izzy M: **That almost makes me feel bad for trying to sodomize him with that taser.

**Bass Bitch: **You don't right?

**Izzy M: **I said almost. He still deserved it, and I regret nothing.

**Wayne: **He attack.

**Garth: **But he also protec.

**Izzy M: **I do anything for the ones I love or want to bang. It's why I regularly get Bakugo's mom's car washed.

**Bass Bitch: **Sounds legit. Mitsuki is extremely hot.

**Bomberman: **Wait. WHAT?

**Izzy M: **She's a hot MILF.

**Bomberman: **Don't you dare.

**Izzy M: **I'm not saying I'd try but….

**Bomberman **has invited **Drunk Dragon **and **Lesser Jedi **to the groupchat.

**Izzy M: **KACHAN YOU BITCH!

**Lesser Jedi: **Izuku Midoriya, you will watch your language.

**Izzy M: **Sorry mom.

**Deus Ex Machina: **If **Lesser Jedi **is Midoriya's mother, then **Drunk Dragon **must be…

**Drunk Dragon: **His father. So how is my little deductible?

**Izzy M: **I'm good. A little tired but, good nonetheless.

**Drunk Dragon: **Just remember our deal. Don't run yourself ragged and I won't show everyone your x-ray from when you broke your tailbone.

**Ninja Mina: **Broke his what?

**Bomberman: **Ass bone. Try to keep up.

**Bass Bitch: **You showed that off the first time he brought me over. First time I saw his penis.

**Lesser Jedi: **You should have seen the look on that male nurse's face. It was like he went from shock, to jealousy, than to shame.

**Anti-Grav: **Wouldn't be the first time we've seen it.

**Froppy: **The couch incident.

**Drunk Dragon: **I taught him that trick. But, I told him not to do it in a leather couch. To hot in those.

**Bomberman: **Of course Earlobes has seen it more.

**Bass Bitch: **BAKUGO YOU BITCH!

**Drunk Dragon: **Thank God I sent you that fishbowl.

**Knuckles: **Fishbowl?

**Drunk Dragon: **You can buy a fishbowl of condoms on Amazon for like 30 dollars these days.

**Izzy M: **KACHAN WHY?

**Bomberman: **Cause paybacks a bitch.

**Authors Note: Chapter 37 Answers: The fat gay guy was Randy from Trailer Park Boys, Izuku's new years story is from Beerfest.**

**Also check out some of my other stories like:**

**Blood Sugar Sex Magic: A crossover between My Hero Academia, Rwby and DC Comics**

**The Deku With The Mouth: Izuku as Deadpool...Nuf Said**

**Into The Dekuverse: Exactly as the title says (Only on fanfictionDotnet)**

**1-A Groupchat 2: Electric Boogaloo: The sequel to this story.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	39. Remake or Remaster

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Wayne** \- Hanta Sero

**Garth **\- Denki Kaminari

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Poison Ivy **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Geezer Pleaser** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

**Civilians**

**Lesser Jedi **\- Inko Midoriya

**Drunk Dragon **\- Hisashi Midoriya

5:00 pm on a Saturday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Knuckles: **Anyone know if the new Final Fantasy VII remake is any good?

**Drunk Dragon: **It's out? I preordered it when it was first announced and after it was delayed three times I canceled it.

**Izzy M: **Best game ever.

**Froppy: **Better than the original?

**Izzy M: **I wouldn't say that. Comparing the two would be like trying to compare the 1922 version of Nosferatu with the NOS4A2 series from 2019. They're both similar, but very different.

**Garth: **What do you mean? Is it a remake or remaster?

**Izzy M: **Remake.If it were a remaster it would be exactly the same as the original.

**Garth: **Elaborate please.

**Izzy M: **The original Final Fantasy VII is a turn based rpg with a massive story, while the remake is more like modern Final Fantasy combat wise and still includes some of the old mechanics from the original, like having to take lots of damage to get your limit breaks and there are multiple ways to win the battles.

**Purple Haze: **But, isn't it just the Midgar section?

**Izzy M: **It is, but Square Enix added a lot of new stuff to the game, like side missions, more mini games, fleshing out the city and side characters and several new improvements.

**Bass Bitch: **I've played some of it too and I can't help but to hear the lines from teamfourstar's abridged series at certain points.

**Drunk Dragon: **I saw that. Cloud sounds exactly like my son in that series. It's fucking eerie.

**Sonic: **Everyone has a doppelganger somewhere. Just happens to be a major coincidence that Midoriya's voices for teamfourstar and played the overall final villain in Fairy Tail.

**Ninja Mina: **Wait, really?

**Anti-Grav: **For one episode when the original VA was not available.

**Garth: **Back to Final Fantasy.

**Izzy M: **I will say this about the original Final Fantasy VII. It hasn't aged well.

**Knuckles: **Say what now?

**Izzy M: **The game is still phenomenal but the graphics don't look great.

**Garth: **Couldn't it just be because it was a product of its time?

**Izzy M: **It came out in 1997. The same year as Star Fox 64, Mario Kart 64, Tekken 3, Harvest Moon, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night, Grand Theft Auto, PaRappa the Rapper, Crash 2 and Gran Turismo.

**Bomberman: **I think what he means is that it's old school.

**Wayne: **How is that different from outdated?

**Bass Bitch: **Old school means that while something is old, it's still enjoyable like old Atari games and Mötley Crüe albums. Outdated means that it isn't enjoyable past the era it first came out. Like Pogs or Temple Run.

**My Little Pony: **I don't think Temple Run even made it out of the year it came out.

**Izzy M: **I forgot you guys were in this chat. Who else is in this outside of 1-A ?

**Battle Fist: **Yo

**Reptar: **Sup

**Poison Ivy: **I'm here for God knows why.

**Literal Iron Man: **Still here.

**Geezer Pleaser: **Unfortunately

**Drunk Dragon **has changed **Geezer Pleaser**'s username to **Smokey**

**Smokey: **I don't get it.

**Izzy M: **I'm pretty sure Mr. Lahey wants his liquor bud.

**MeiDay Parade: **You just got burned Ma-fucka. Knowm sayin'

**Swole Vault Boy: **Nice.

**CutieDevil: **Don't know about you guys, but I fucking hate that guy.

**Smokey: **Why?

**CutieDevil: **Cause you constantly harass my friends from the work study and you referred to me as, and I quote, "Bangalicious"

**Izzy M: **That settles it. I'm taking the other testicle.

**Lesser Jedi: **Izuku, remember what I told you about castrating other students.

**Izzy M: **To not do it unless it's a rapist or pedophile.

**Smokey: **Sucks to be you faggot.

**Lesser Jedi:** On second thought. Use the rustiest tools you have and don't forget to pour as much lemon juice as you can in the cuts.

**Smokey: **Wait, what?

**Drunk Dragon: **You just had to push the f****t button didn't you?

**Bomberman: **Aunty Inko doesn't tolerate that homophobic shit. It's why she refuses to watch Fox News.

**Authors Note: Chapter 38 answers: Izuku's hallucination to mushrooms is a reference to Trailer Park Boys: The Animated Series, including the phrase "Thank you Jesus-God" there actually was a catholics only town in Florida, they didn't sell any birth control or allow pornographic movies on their tv airways. Very cult-like. Kaminari's request and Izuku's response are from The Simpsons, the leather couch thing was from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Also, if you haven't played the Final Fantasy VII remake yet, go play it. It's one of the only new games I've played this year that has truly blown me away. It's that good.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	40. Special Announcement

**This is a special announcement from the author:**

**On July 6, 2020 we will be reaching the 1 year anniversary of the first chapter of 1-A Groupchat. I know most of you read this for my cutting edge on political satire...Or maybe it's dick jokes and substance abuse. That is why before the 1 year anniversary for everyone OVER the legal drinking age (God knows I can't afford to get sued again) I am introducing the 1-A Drinking Game.**

**-Any time someone swears - take a drink**

**-Any time someone is drunk - take a drink**

**-Any time someone changes another person's username - take a drink**

**-Anytime someone changes the chat name - take two drinks**

**-Anytime Mineta pisses you off - just start waterfalling until he stops pissing you off**

**-Any time you catch a reference - take a drink**

**-Any time there is a joke about Jiro and Izuku's relationship - take three drinks**

**-Any time I make a joke about Izuku's strange childhood - finish your drink**

**Happy boozing.**

**FYI I'm on discord now. You can find me Ranger#3935 or just try and find the server called Ranger's Fun House. I won't be on it much but it's a place for me to occasionally drop some ideas.**


	41. Vinegar Strokes, Bumper Stickers and Sel

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Wayne** \- Hanta Sero

**Garth **\- Denki Kaminari

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Poison Ivy **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Smokey** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

**Civilians**

**Lesser Jedi **\- Inko Midoriya

**Drunk Dragon **\- Hisashi Midoriya

7:00 pm on a Tuesday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Bass Bitch: **So if anyone notices Izzy hiding cameras anywhere, make sure they are not in your rooms or above your bed. He's working on some kind of project.

**Bomberman: **What kind of project involves hidden cameras in bedrooms?

**Izzy M: **I'm trying to see what someone's vinegar strokes look like.

**Thermostat: **What are vinegar strokes?

**Izzy M: **It's that point in sex where a guy is close to orgasm and he can't stop. No matter what. Took me getting hit with a heavy object in the face during sex to discover the phenomenon.

**Knuckles: **Why is it called vinegar strokes?

**Izzy M: **It's because the face you make when it happens looks like you held a spoonful of vinegar under your nose.

**Garth: **Why are you trying to film someone else's vinegar strokes? Why don't you film yourself?

**Izzy M: **It's kind of next to impossible to film yourself in any sexual situation. Also I refuse to film Kyoka and me having sex.

**Bass Bitch: **Good idea. If you ever did that I would castrate you on the spot.

**Garth: **How many times have you tried filming yourself?

**Izzy M: **I don't feel comfortable answering that. BTW you might want to change your bedsheets soon.

**Garth: **WHAT DID YOU DO?

**Izzy M: **A gentleman never asks.

**Bass Bitch: **And a lady never tells.

**Literal Iron Man: **Sounds like they did some stuff on your bed.

**Drunk Dragon: **That's my boy.

**Izzy M: **By the way, Monoma, I have to ask.

**Smokey: **Go ahead you 1-A bastard.

**Izzy M: **With your hero costume, are you a magician who is also a rapist or a rapist who likes to do magic?

**Battle Fist: **So you saw it too?

**Bass Bitch: **Everyone sees it.

**Smokey: **I didn't have any of those in mind.

**Poison Ivy: **Sure you didn't.

**Smokey: **Why don't you ask why that 1-A creation bitch dresses like a stripper?

**Knuckles: **Cause no one saw that as a stripper costume. More like a cross between a one piece bathing suit and that fox chick from that game Deku always beats us at when we play gamecube.

**Izzy M: **Krystal from Starfox Assault.

**Bass Bitch: **Your inner nerd is showing.

**Izzy M: **You know you love it.

**Garth: **Not a private chat BTW.

**Knuckles: **You should know by now that they just love messing with us. You're just the easiest.

**Garth: **I'm not that easy.

**Ninja Mina: **Yes you are.

**Izzy M:** Dude, you're so easy that Eri successfully roasts you and she's six.

**Garth: **No she doesn't.

**Bass Bitch: **She put an I Eat Ass sticker on your back just last week. I don't even know where she got it.

**Izzy M: **She might have got it from my room. It's something I got during my last trip to Florida.

**Anti-Grav: **Of course you got it from Florida.

**Izzy M: **If anything, Kaminari got lucky it was the I Eat Ass sticker becauseI got a box full of even more offensive bumper stickers during that trip.

**Knuckles: **What do they say?

**Izzy M: **Lets see, there's; I Fist Ass, My Child Eats Your Honor Student's Ass, I'll Shit On Your Chest, I Chug Jizz, My Other Ride Is Your Mom's C**t, Blue Lives Don't Matter, Black LivesBlue Lives≥Women, Guns Don't Kill People, Cops Do, Dead People Can't Say No, Everyone You Love Will Eventually Die

**Bass Bitch: **At least you censored yourself when saying c**t.

**Izzy M: **I'm not an animal.

**Froppy: **Why do you have them?

**Izzy M: **You all know I have a fucked up sense of humor.

**Bass Bitch: **Can confirm, he has one of the worst ones on his laptop.

**Bomberman: **I need to know what could be worse than any of those.

**Izzy M: **It's a sticker of an anime girl with huge boobs and cosplaying as the Starbucks Logo holding her legs spread eagle while saying the phrase "Drink me senpai"

**Thermostat: **And this is the guy beating three fourths of us in academics.

**Izzy M: **And don't you forget it.

**Deus Ex Machina: **How are you still a student here Midoriya?

**Izzy M: **All of the teachers and Nezu himself are amused by the things I do.

**Purple Haze: **Can confirm. I saw Aizawa, Midnight and Present Mic laughing at the footage of the self defense test.

**Ninja Mina: **Self defense test?

**Purple Haze: **He let me hit him with pepper spray, a stun gun, and a police taser. There was a fourth one but I refused to do it so he did it to himself.

**Sonic: **What did he do to himself?

**Purple Haze: **He wore a bulletproof vest and shot himself point blank in the chest.

**Anti-Grav: **Dude.

**Bass Bitch: **What the fuck?

**Izzy M: **I wanted to know what it felt like.

**Bass Bitch: **You could have let Momo shoot you with a beanbag gun.

**Izzy M: **Yeah but we already had the gun and the vest so might as well use them.

**Bomberman: **If no ones going to ask, I will. What did it feel like to get shot with a bulletproof vest?

**Izzy M: **You saw the video, but it felt like getting punched by a UFC fighter on PCP.

**Discount Sue Storm: **Your not all there in the head, are you?

**Izzy M: **Yeah, I'm a mess.

**Authors Note: Chapter 39 answers: the obvious Trailer Park Boys reference. Let's see how many complaints I get for those offensive bumper stickers, despite the fact I removed the most offensive ones.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	42. 1-A Groupchat (1 Year)

**On July 7 I will be posting the special 1 year anniversary chapter of 1-A Groupchat.**

**Due to this being an amazing accomplishment I want to let the readers choose the major plot points I want to include.**

**On my profile is going to be a new poll for you all to vote on and whichever gets the most votes will take the most importance.**

**However I will be revealing who the UA traitor is (In this story)**

**Here are the poll options**

**Deku decides to go to rehab**

**Deku proposes to Jiro**

**Mineta gets added back to class 1-A for some unexplained and unshown reason**

**Kaminari wins award for smallest penis on the internet**

**Bakugo tries heroine**

**I finally ad All-Might to the chat**

**I add all the teachers to the chat**

**Kaminari and Kirishima try to buy something off Craigslist and accidentally interrupt a mid afternoon orgy**

**All of the above**

**One of those is a fake troll option.**

**Also I am offering a special prize to whoever creates a tvtropes page for 1-A groupchat and gets it on the fan-works page for MHA on tvtropes a cameo appearance in 1-A groupchat as a support student. Just send a link in a PM or leave it in a review. Just change the link' punctuation to words.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	43. Traitor Revealed

**A quick note before we begin: THANK YOU ALL FOR ONE YEAR**

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Wayne** \- Hanta Sero

**Garth **\- Denki Kaminari

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Poison Ivy **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Smokey** \- Nieto Monoma

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

**Civilians**

**Lesser Jedi **\- Inko Midoriya

**Drunk Dragon **\- Hisashi Midoriya

**UA Staff**

**Cryptic **\- Nezu

**Offbrand Batman **\- Eraserhead

**Banshee **\- Present Mic

**Dr. Sleep **\- Midnight

**White Mage **\- Recovery Girl

**Eli **\- Vlad King

**All Might **\- All Might

**League of Villians**

**Mercer **\- Tomura Shigaraki

**Carmila **\- Himiko Toga

**Deadpool **\- Twice

**Lizard Priest **\- Spinner

**Firefly **\- Dabi

**Magic Man **\- Mr. Compress

**Tr8or **\- ?

7:00 pm on a Thursday

**LoV**

**Mercer: **Is the plan set up.

**Tr8or: **The operative is waiting in Midoriya's van as we speak.

**Carmila: **This feels wrong.

**Firefly: **Couldn't we just barbecue him alive?

**Mercer: **It needs to look like an accident.

**Lizard Priest: **Why does it need to look like an accident?

**Mercer: **That way, while they are mourning their fallen comrade we can strike when they least expect it.

**Tr8or: **At his funeral.

**Magic Man: **That seems kind of wrong doesn't it?

**Firefly: **I mean, I've done some pretty bad things but attacking mourners at a funeral just seems like something that we ABSOLUTELY SHOULD NOT DO!

**Carmila: **I totally agree with Dabi on this one.

**Lizard Priest: **A true hero would never stoop so low.

**Deadpool: **Not gonna happen. KILL THEM WITH FIRE!

**Magic Man: **Sounds like it's just you and the traitor alone on this one sir.

3:00 pm on a Friday

**Staff Chat**

**Cryptic: **Due to events earlier we need to crack down on who might be the UA traitor.

**Offbrand Batman: **You don't need to remind us about it. We all remember that earlier this morning a villain assassin attacked the Problem Child in his van.

**Banshee: **And your student purposely flipped his car and caused the villain to die from a broken neck.

**White Mage: **If it wasn't for the fact he didn't injure himself I would be leaving him to wollow in his pain.

**All Might: **Doesn't that violate your hippocratic oath?

**White Mage: **Watch it. I kept you alive, and I can ensure your death just as easy.

**Eli: **Back to the topic at hand.

**Cryptic: **Midoriya was able to retrieve the villain's phone and noticed a contact named Tr8or, which he proceeded to call and was able to figure out who the UA traitor is.

**Offbrand Batman: **And have we apprehended them?

**Cryptic: **Not yet, we're waiting for the right moment to play our hand. Although we do plan on preceding with his arrest before the days end.

**Dr. Sleep: **Who is it?

**Cryptic: **Vlad, you might not want to hear this.

**Eli: **It's one of my students?

**Cryptic: **I hacked into every one of the student's phones and found the villain's phone numbers and a groupchat detailing their plan to assassinate Midoriya and attack his funeral in Nieto Monoma's phone.

**Eli: **I understand what has to be done.

**Offbrand Batman: **I'm truly sorry Kan.

**Eli: **I appreciate the sentiment Shota.

**Cryptic: **In the meantime I will cancel classes for the next few weeks while we up security and deal with the press. Also to let Midoriya recover from his injuries.

**Dr. Sleep: **That bad?

**White Mage: **The steering column came loose, landed on him and shattered his hip and he had several cuts from the glass of his windows and windshield breaking.

**All Might: **And we're wishing young Midoriya a speedy recovery.

**Banshee: **Can't Recovery Girl heal him?

**White Mage: **The cuts I can heal in no time at all. They take almost no energy. Broken bones I could normally heal but the hip is something that I could heal under normal circumstances but his had to be put back together surgically and it will take at least a month until I'll be able to heal it. It still needs to somewhat re-solidify.

**Offbrand Batman: **That sounds like it's going to be extremely painful.

**White Mage: **They gave him some Oxycontin for the pain.

**Offbrand Batman: **Are they sure that's a good idea, considering his history of substance abuse.

**Dr. Sleep: **I already spoke to him about it. He said he thinks the doctor was getting paid to push that drug on patients.

**Banshee: **At least he's smart enough to not overdo Oxy.

**Authors Note: Part 1 of the 1 year anniversary special. Due to most people voting all of the above and I like entertaining my readers I decided to do all of them (Except the troll option of Mineta rejoining) for the 1 year anniversary. Expect the next part to be more lighthearted and fun. Now as usual, Chapter 40 answers: Vinegar strokes is from The League, as well as asking if Manoma was a magician who's also a rapist or a rapist that likes to do magic. All the bumper stickers were from the episode of Tosh.0 titled "I Eat Ass" The Self Defense Test was the precursor to Jackass. Expect part 2 in a few days.**

**As Always**

**Later**


	44. Traitor Aftermath

**A quick note before we begin: THANK YOU ALL FOR ONE YEAR**

**Class 1-A**

**Izzy M**\- Izuku Midoriya

**Bomberman** \- Katsuki Bakugo

**Sonic** \- Tenya Iida

**Ninja Mina** \- Mina Ashido

**Bass Bitch** \- Kyoka Jiro

**Froppy** \- Tsuyu Asui

**Tentacle Hentai** \- Mezo Shoji

**Thermostat** \- Shoto Todoroki

**Discount Sue Storm** \- Toru Hagakure

**Wayne** \- Hanta Sero

**Garth **\- Denki Kaminari

**Knuckles** \- Eijiro Kirishima

**French Fry** \- Yuga Aoyama

**Tails** \- Mashirao Ojiro

**Deus Ex Machina** \- Momo Yaoyorozu

**Anti-Grav** \- Ochaco Uraraka

**Ultra Furry** \- Koji Koda

**Sugar Daddy** \- Rikido Sato

**Tsukuyomi** \- Fumikage Tokoyami

**Purple Haze **\- Hitoshi Shinso

**Class 1-B**

**Battle Fist **\- Itsuka Kendo

**Reptar **\- Setsuna Tokage

**Poison Ivy **\- Ibara Shiozaki

**My Little Pony **\- Pony Tsunotori

**Literal Iron Man **\- Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

**Big Three**

**Swole Vault Boy **\- Mirio Togata

**CutieDevil **\- Nejire Hado

**Support**

**MeiDay Parade **\- Mei Hatsume

**Civilians**

**Lesser Jedi **\- Inko Midoriya

**Drunk Dragon **\- Hisashi Midoriya

**UA Staff**

**Cryptic **\- Nezu

**Offbrand Batman **\- Eraserhead

**Banshee **\- Present Mic

**Dr. Sleep **\- Midnight

**White Mage **\- Recovery Girl

**Eli **\- Vlad King

**All Might **\- All Might

6:00 pm on a Saturday

**THE MITTENS OF DISAPPROVAL**

**Cryptic: **After the events of the last few days we have suspended classes while we increase security. We have also arrested Nieto Monoma for collaborating with the League of Villains.

**Deus Ex Machina: **What about Midoriya's condition?

**White Mage: **Aside from some cuts from the windows and his hip getting shattered in the accident he should make a full recovery.

**Literal Iron Man: **At least he's going to be ok.

**My Little Pony: **I wouldn't call a broken hip ok.

**White Mage: **Shattered, not broken.

**Knuckles: **When will he be discharged?

**White Mage: **About three hours ago. Apparently he was listening to Your Pussy's Glued To a Building On Fire by John Frusciante on repeat the whole time he was awake. They said it was amusing and sort of morbid at first then the other patients and doctors started complaining so they discharged him.

**Ultra Furry: **That's kind of messed up.

**Tentacle Hentai: **Even he's saying it.

**Anti-Grav: **Are all the cryptics coming out?

**Tails: **Sup.

**Tsukuyomi: **Revelry in the dark.

**French Fry: **What do you think?

**Sugar Daddy: **It's almost like some entity keeps forgetting about us.

**Purple Haze: **You guys do tend to blend into the background.

**Bomberman: **He does have a point.

**Ninja Mina: **Plus none of you guys do anything memorable outside of attacks and exams.

**Wayne: **Like last week for example, Kaminari and Kirishima accidentally started a craigslist orgy.

**Dr. Sleep: **YOU DID WHAT?

**Offbrand Batman: **Wait for it.

**Froppy: **Wait for what?

**Banshee: **You'll see.

**Dr. Sleep: **AND YOU DIDN'T INVITE ME?

**Offbrand Batman: **Midnight, there our students. Remember that.

**Reptar: **How did you manage that.

**Knuckles: **Well you see...

**Garth: **The thing is…

**Bomberman: **Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumbass decided to put a troll add on craigslist looking for something called a "Brazilian Porcupine" Unfortunately for them, they didn't make sure it was a real thing and they put Tweedle Dumbass' address down on the add. Turns out the Brazilian Porcupine is an actual sex act involving ten people and a shit ton of lube. Could have been worse.

**Anti-Grav: **How could it have been worse.

**Bomberman: **It could have been one of the moves with the word Alabama in the title.

**Sonic: **How can anything with Alabama in the title be worse?

**Purple Haze: **Every sex act on urban dictionary that has Alabama in the title includes either shit, piss, semen, vomit, incest or all of the above.

**Deus Ex Machina: **What the fuck is up with people from Alabama?

**Garth: **Probably the same thing as the Germans.

**Knuckles: **So that's why Germany is called the Alabama of Europe.

**Purple Haze: **That's unfair to compare the Germans to Alabama people.

**Ninja Mina: **Are you saying Alabama people are worse than Germans.

**Purple Haze: **I don't think Germany named their college football team after a euphemism to a woman's period.

**Garth: **Right, the Alabama Crimson Tide.

**Purple Haze: **Spot on Kaminari.

**Garth: **I was just joking around. That's their actual team name?

**Purple Haze: **It is. And Germany has never refused to show a movie because it had a gay character. Alabama theatres refused to show the live action Beauty And The Beast movie when it was released. Don't get me started on the Alabama cut of the Harry Potter movies. The whole thing is only like 30 minutes of a teen being mentaly abused by his adoptive family because they removed all references to magic and cut all eight movies together.

**Bomberman: **I know he made the last one up but he is right about Alabama.

**Anti-Grav: **Guess that's one place I'm not going.

**Wayne: **Better then Kaminari winning the award for smallest penis on the internet.

**Ninja Mina: **I'm pretty sure that was set up by Jiro and Midoriya as a prank.

**Knuckles: **How did you figure it out?

**Ninja Mina: **Because the presenter was Midoriya in a tv dad's sweater with a fake mustache, while the cameraman was Jiro speaking in a fake Italian accent while also wearing a fake mustache.

**Deus Ex Machina: **Speaking of, where is Jiro exactly?

**Thermostat: **Her and her parents are with the Midoriyas at the moment.

**Discount Sue Storm: **And you know this how?

**Thermostat: **Because when she left she said exactly where she would be, you just weren't paying attention.

**Authors Note: I'm making this a three parter, mainly because I want to do a whole POV chapter with Izuku telling Jiro about the incident and some of the more dramatic plot points I put on the poll. Now, the answers for Chapter 41: Shigaraki's username was the name of the Prototype protagonist Alex Mercer, Toga's was a reference to the book Carmila, a vampire novela from 1872, twice was the obvious one, Spinner's was Lizard Priest based off the Goblin Slayer character, and Mr. Compress was Magic Man after the Adventure Time character. As for the Heroes Present Mic's was Banshee after the X-Man character who used his voice as a weapon, Midnight's was Dr. Sleep after the Stephen King novel of the same name, Vlad King's was Eli after the vampire protagonist from the 2004 novel Let The Right One In. The plan to attack a funeral was from Saints Row 2.**

**As Always**

**Later**


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